Maybe devolution isn't such a bad idea...

[the_lone_wolf]

"A man caught trying to have sex with his bicycle has been sentenced to three years on probation."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7095134.stm

:smt043

[Mr Toad]

I feel sorry for the guy. If you can't bonk your bicycle in the privacy of your own bedroom what's the world coming to :roll:

[metalmonkey]

:smt046:smt046 That made laught, a lot thats dam funny......Yeah you would have though the dude would have been save in the bderoom though, at least it didn't involve a dyson:eek:

[tigersaw]

[quote=bluethunder;1340988 at least it didn't involve a dyson:eek:[/quote]

Indeed. I bet if Dysons were sold in America they would carry a disclaimer - not to used as a sex aid - weve got several Dysons, and they dont half suck.

[-Ralph-]

Hang on a minute....

OK, the bicycle things pretty weird.....

Maybe it was the latest model mountain bike or something. The iPhone of the bicycle world. Who knows? But thats not the real story here.

He was in a locked hotel room and they walked in on the guy! How could he possibly have been breaching the peace by simulating sex in a hotel room. He wasn't up the chicken aisle in Tesco's, or even in the bicycle section of Halfords, or even in a public toilet! And the sex offenders register? Was that the national society for the protection of bicycles that persuaded the judge of that one? "Put him on the register, he'll never get a job with Raleigh after that! And certainly not the bicycle division at the post office!"

Lets turn the tables a bit. Your in a locked hotel room. No actually, the judge is in a locked hotel room. He's not just simulating sex, but doing his wife for all he's worth. Of course he ignores the bloody door, this is the first time she's not had a headache in three months and wild horses wouldn't stop him. Or maybe he's just having a lonely right hand tango over a picture of his labrador. The hostel owner barges in and calls the police 'cos he's breaching the peace?

OK, you wouldn't catch a judge dead in a hostel, but you get my point.

[Richie]

maybe he was ringing the bell too loudly...

NO.. I completely agree with -Ralpf-...


Watch out...
Next they will be saying ladies using vibrators are breaching the peace by simulating sex

[metalmonkey]

Yeah he was in a private place, don't know how it was worked out, but just made really laugh, wrong for laughting probally, but hey was funny

[hovis]

my bike is sexy

[phil24_7]

You'll hump anything Hovis!

[jumjum_0214]

Ok definition time:

A breach of the peace occurs when Harm is actually done or is likely to be done to a person or a persons property or a person feels they will be harmed through assault affray riot unlawful assembly or other disturbance.

To me a bloke having his wicked way with his beloved bike in the privacy of his own room/home does not constitute a breach of the peace.????????

It is weird though :-)

[the_lone_wolf]

my bike is sexy
ooo, carbon fibre splinters...

nasty:eek:

[scooby2102]

kinda brings a new meaning to the phrase "riding ma bike"


wonder if he's a queen fan

[philipMac]

He was in a locked hotel room and they walked in on the guy! How could he possibly have been breaching the peace by simulating sex in a hotel room.

Right.
I seriously dont get this.
At all.
wft are the charges??? Breach of the peace?
I mean, we all laugh at (and rightly so) countries who forbid kissing, or holding hands in public. We are allowed wear a mini skirts, or Christ help us, pink leathers in public.


And... some lad puts his weiney in a... emm, I suppose I dont know... a bike somehow, and he is all over the news?

How is this different to having sex with one of those sex doll things? Or... jesus, I dunno, using a vibrator? I mean... its a thing. Its not an animal, or a person. Its a piece of metal. Or plasic. Something anyway.

Is there a rule book somewhere that sets out the things you are allowed touch your weiney or your woo-woo off?
Apparently there is. Apparently the UK morality police are displeased.

Is it ok to say that an Elka rear shock is sexy? Or is that in breach of the moral police code too?


This stuff... seriously... seems pretty brain damaged to me.
Maybe I am missing something very fundamental here.

[SVTONYB]

Ok definition time:

A breach of the peace occurs when Harm is actually done or is likely to be done to a person or a persons property or a person feels they will be harmed through assault affray riot unlawful assembly or other disturbance.



jumjum that is the English definition of A Breach of the peace

1. In England and Wales: a riot or disturbance which violates the public peace, involving harm to people or property, or fear of assault.

2. In Scotland: a disturbance of the public peace which might reasonably lead to the public being alarmed, and is classed as a crime.

[hovis]

You'll hump anything Hovis!

you knows it:smt045

[the_lone_wolf]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7098116.stm

So this isn't the first time our northen brethren have been getting jiggy with strange objects...

"In 1997 Robert Watt, 38, was fined £100 for trying to have sex with a shoe in an Edinburgh street"

:D

[jumjum_0214]

Im not defending the weirdo but it wasnt even in public.

[Wideboy]

haha i'd like to hear this when he goes for a job interview.

have you got any criminal convictions?..... yes.... what for?.... well sir, to be frank, i was caught shaggin' my push bike

:smt044

[redbouy]

For sale. one push bike. ridden one time :smt103

[phil24_7]

:sick:

[The Basket]

He admitted his guilt and therefore had to be convicted.

Common sense was lost here. But he shouldn't have been arrested in the first place.

But would you want this guy anywhere near your Raleigh Chopper? I rest my case.

[hovis]

i see a money making opertunity here, get a few old bikes, and pimp them out

[phil24_7]

Feel my pimp hand b1tch!