View Full Version : Too fat to work
gettin2dizzy
19-11-07, 02:01 PM
Almost two thousand people who are too fat to work have been paid a total of £4.4 million in benefit, it emerged last night. Other payments went to fifty sufferers of acne and ten incapacitated by leprosy.
Billions of pounds is being paid in benefits to people claiming to be unable to work because they suffer from depression, stress, fatigue and unknown or unspecified diseases.
The full list of ailments of the 2.7 million people claiming £7.4 billion in incapacity benefits, obtained by using Freedom of Information laws, will fuel suspicion that it is being used to keep them off the official jobless total. It will also fuel the debate over whether British workers could have been hired for more of the one million new jobs taken by migrants since 1997.
Overall more than £1.1 billion was paid to people suffering from a depressive episode plus a further £276 million to the estimated 116,000 claimants with “other anxiety disorders” and £122 million to the estimated 50,000 suffering from a “reaction to severe stress”.
A total of 15,600 people received benefits for “malaise and fatigue” and a further 8,100 for “dizziness and giddiness”. The figures disclose that 4,000 claimants had headaches, 2,700 migraines and 1,890 suffered from eating disorders. About £100,000 in benefits went to those with acne and a similar amount to 60 people with “nail disorder”. Nausea and vomiting cost £2 million in benefits for 900 people.
I bet they spend their days on internet forums ;)
I bet they spend their days on internet forums ;)
what r u trying to say?
Caddy2000
19-11-07, 02:04 PM
I'm just too stupid not to work....... :smt117
Too fat to work ;)
http://i91.photobucket.com/albums/k295/hovi5/Homer_simpson_-_muumuu.jpg
Speedy Claire
19-11-07, 02:16 PM
I`m only on here cos i`m off sick today :D
who the hell has leprosy these days??? 10 people ??? where did they catch that then
Caddy2000
19-11-07, 02:18 PM
Why is it that I feel that it will be only a matter of time before our Nation's great Tabloid Media (and I am taking the right royal) will link this with a certain yellow cartoon character............
gettin2dizzy
19-11-07, 02:18 PM
Acne?! Unless the spot is big enough to cover both of their eyes, I don't understand how you can get the day off!
I`m only on here cos i`m off sick today :D
who the hell has leprosy these days??? 10 people ??? where did they catch that then
http://www.break.com/index/horrible-disease-turns-man-into-tree.html
i'm off sick today!
But I am really sick. I just went to superdrug for lemsip & neurofene & all these old ladies with trolleys get pushing past me & crowding me out. Really pushy, bossy & beligerent.
No hoodies for me to worry about!
i'm off sick today!
I just went to superdrug for lemsip & neurofene !
i put it to you that if you are well enough to go to the shops........... you are well enough to go to work
i put it to you that if you are well enough to go to the shops........... you are well enough to go to work
erm, i didn't pop down the west end...local shop 5 mins away & I've been breathing like an asthmatic pervert on a school bus ever since.
Its a pretty crazy statistic. This new questionnaire they are proposing wont do a damn thing though.
erm, i didn't pop down the west end...local shop 5 mins away & I've been breathing like an asthmatic pervert on a school bus ever since.
im not intrested in your personal fetish's
too many peeps have time off work cos they have a cold, or somthing equally lame (IMO)
im not intrested in your personal fetish's
too many peeps have time off work cos they have a cold, or somthing equally lame (IMO)
If it was just a sniffle, fair game I'd be at my desk but this one floored me all of yesterday & I'm still feeling it today. If I did go in I would only end up feeling crap, infecting everyone else & delaying my recovery.
too many peeps have time off work cos they have a cold, or somthing equally lame (IMO)
Proud to say I cant remember the last time i was off ill......I work pretty much through everything. I was even out at 4 am one morning with a stonking migrane.....ended up having to pull over and sleep for 3 hrs in a layby to recover slightly.
Best way to get rid of an illness is to be out and about with your body working hard.
Pedro68
19-11-07, 03:25 PM
Not to mention that some medicines can cause drowsiness and some even stipulate that you don't operate heavy machinery whilst taking said medicine (car & bike would probably fall into that category, which means that you'd better either use public transport (and infect a much larger number of people, and cause an epidemic), or stay at home and endanger nobody and nothing except your own sanity with the drivel that is daytime TV - is there anything more likely to get a person to return to work than THAT cr*p??
kwak zzr
19-11-07, 03:27 PM
is this why i'm putting on all that weight?
If it was just a sniffle, fair game I'd be at my desk but this one floored me all of yesterday & I'm still feeling it today. If I did go in I would only end up feeling crap, infecting everyone else & delaying my recovery. i belive you
Proud to say I cant remember the last time i was off ill......I work pretty much through everything. .
wot he said
well, I discovered today that "This morning" is now in London. With Philip Scofield & Jabba the Hutt.
gettin2dizzy
19-11-07, 03:34 PM
If it was just a sniffle, fair game I'd be at my desk but this one floored me all of yesterday & I'm still feeling it today. If I did go in I would only end up feeling crap, infecting everyone else & delaying my recovery.
Exactamundo!
use public transport and infect a much larger number of people, and cause an epidemic, or stay at home and endanger nobody
Thats rubbish, short of sneezing in someones face or giving them a big snog you are unlikely to give anything to anyone.....pure myth
Welsh_Wizard
19-11-07, 03:40 PM
Had 1 day off this year, no days off last year and 3 days off in 2005. I only know this 'cos i am filling out a medical form right now..
I either get absolutely hammered by a cold, or nothing.. never in between when i am just 'under the weather' - man/death flu or nowt.
Thats rubbish, short of sneezing in someones face or giving them a big snog you are unlikely to give anything to anyone.....pure myth
No it isn't. Coughs and sneezes spread diseases. If any of my lot have a cold I send 'em home.
Had 1 day off this year, no days off last year and 3 days off in 2005. I only know this 'cos i am filling out a medical form right now..
I either get absolutely hammered by a cold, or nothing.. never in between when i am just 'under the weather' - man/death flu or nowt.
I got really ill in 1999 and was in hospital for a long time....since then I seem to have been imune from most stuff. I just get major migranes because of my crap eyes, back aches from all the lumber punctures from when i was in hospital, and I reckon I'm getting arthritus in my hands and knees from a combination of clicking them to much and my hands constantly being in freezing cold water when i was younger.
No it isn't. Coughs and sneezes spread diseases. If any of my lot have a cold I send 'em home.
Unless you are literally stood in someones face you are highly unlikely to catch anything, theres plenty of workplace and scientific studies about which confirm it. I cant be arsed googling it to back the above up but about 5 years back it was something i was forced to study at uni :rolleyes: yawn
All I really remember is you can sneeze upto a speed of about 180kph and particulates travel upto 2 metres, very very few of those particulates can infect.
Unless you are literally stood in someones face you are highly unlikely to catch anything, theres plenty of workplace and scientific studies about which confirm it. I cant be arsed googling it to back the above up but about 5 years back it was something i was forced to study at uni :rolleyes: yawn
All I really remember is you can sneeze upto a speed of about 180kph and particulates travel upto 2 metres, very very few of those particulates can infect.
So where did I get this terrible cold from? Don't remember snogging any pretty ladeez in the last week!
No it isn't. Coughs and sneezes spread diseases. If any of my lot have a cold I send 'em home.
:smt041
Awesome! I hate it when sick people go to work.
I don't WANT their lurgy. On the tubes and trains you can smell it on their breath... When they're coughing and hacking, sneezing, blowing their noses they're spreading the germs. I've caught bugs off people countless times from close proximity on public transport or at work.
So where did I get this terrible cold from? Don't remember snogging any pretty ladeez in the last week!
The most common way of contracting germs is off objects like door handles, worktops, clothing, food.
If you shared gloves with someone who hadnt washed their hands after blowing their nose, or shared a balaclava with someone recently, anything like that.
yorkie_chris
19-11-07, 04:02 PM
Too fat to work?
Simple solution, don't pay the lardy gets a penny, they'll soon be slim enough to work!
The most common way of contracting germs is off objects like door handles, worktops, clothing, food.
If you shared gloves with someone who hadnt washed their hands after blowing their nose, or shared a balaclava with someone recently, anything like that.
:lol: Which means that only someone with OCD is going to NOT give someone else their cold. :D
:lol: Which means that only someone with OCD is going to NOT give someone else their cold. :D
I have a cleaning fetish :smt010 its true. Honestly though its not as easy to catch something as people make out, blooming scare mongerers :p
I have a cleaning fetish :smt010 its true. Honestly though its not as easy to catch something as people make out, blooming scare mongerers :p
:mrgreen:
Try using the tube... or even overground trains down here on the commute to London where everyone's WAHAY too close for comfort... :thumbdown:
:mrgreen:
Try using the tube... or even overground trains down here on the commute to London where everyone's WAHAY too close for comfort... :thumbdown:
frottage....
:mrgreen:
Try using the tube... or even overground trains down here on the commute to London where everyone's WAHAY too close for comfort... :thumbdown:
I commute in london a fair bit either drive as most places i go have underground or private parking or opt for underground from stanmore then taxi from then on in.
I know what your saying though. Windows open an a nice warm blast of air sorts out smelly people :p
metalmonkey
19-11-07, 07:10 PM
:mrgreen:
Try using the tube... or even overground trains down here on the commute to London where everyone's WAHAY too close for comfort... :thumbdown:
Thats why i ride or drive most places, normally take pubic transport when going out.....I was off work for 34 days this year becasue of surgery, I hope not to have any more time off! It doesn't look good on my file in hr if I'm off sick so I try not to take any sick time unless I have too, I had that cold flu thing going around last month. I went from bed-work-bed to get better. If are you are ill and can take off then do so you heal quicker.
wheelnut
19-11-07, 08:15 PM
There will be even more people claiming benefits with Bronchitis & smoking related diseases since they brought in the smoking ban.
How am I supposed to keep warm stood outside the pub having a fag in this weather?
gettin2dizzy
19-11-07, 08:18 PM
The most common way of contracting germs is off objects like door handles, worktops, clothing, food.
If you shared gloves with someone who hadnt washed their hands after blowing their nose, or shared a balaclava with someone recently, anything like that.
workspace = shared space! Which ever way you put it, you're more likely to infect someone if you go in to work ill.
MeridiaNx
19-11-07, 09:45 PM
If benefit is from here on in calcualted to be less than the cost of a KFC bargain bucket then the problem should be gone before too long?
Ah, though I suppose they could then sue for emotional distress related damages?
timwilky
19-11-07, 10:56 PM
would a gigolo/prostitute qualify for sick pay in the event of catching a "Social Disease"?
would a gigolo/prostitute qualify for sick pay in the event of catching a "Social Disease"?
No, because although it's the oldest profession in the world, they're generally self-employed.
gettin2dizzy
20-11-07, 07:52 AM
OOooh. Feeling a bit fat after breakfast. Not sure if I can work...
Pedro68
20-11-07, 08:22 AM
use public transport (and infect a much larger number of people, and cause an epidemic), or stay at home and endanger nobody
Thats rubbish, short of sneezing in someones face or giving them a big snog you are unlikely to give anything to anyone.....pure myth
Harsh but fair ... but then again ...
No scientific research has yet been done on this but experts in virology believe poor ventilation and a lack of space can make some forms of public transport a fertile breeding ground. However there is a strong argument this fear may be over-hyped. [1]
So it's neither proven, nor disproven ... hardly rubbish, but then not exactly based on scientific fact (admittedly) either ;-)
[1] http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/4056411.stm
Pedro68
20-11-07, 08:26 AM
would a gigolo/prostitute qualify for sick pay in the event of catching a "Social Disease"?
No, because although it's the oldest profession in the world, they're generally self-employed.
Try telling that to their pimp ;-)
vBulletin® , Copyright ©2000-2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.