View Full Version : What constitutes work place bullying?
DanDare
26-02-08, 01:44 PM
I am having a few problems at work at the moment with a certain individual.
Now he's the worlds biggest loser and I have nothing but utter contempt for him.
Recently we fell out because I ordered an item to his exact spec, but it was wrong. I told him I was trying to help and he called me a tw**. I lost my rag and told him I am not standing for abuse for helping out a colleague and told him to organise himself.
Anyway since then he has kept dropping comments everytime we pass in the office, then denies it when I confront him. I have had my time card hidden.
When I go past his unit I get verbally abused. He has also lied to my work friends about me. Its all about stirring things up.
No don't get me wrong, I am not a wimp of any sort or would normally go down this route, however knocking seven bales of sh** out of him would probably lose me my job. And I haven't got time to lower to his level.
So i have decided to lodge a complaint of work place harrasement to shake him up. I won't fully persue it I just want him to sweat a bit. Do I have enough to warrant a case, although there's no evidence.
What's everyones thoughts?:smt100
Evidence is a subjective thing. The whole point about bullying is unless he's daft enough to email you or leave a voice mail you won't be able to prove it so I'd go down the same route as people who have disputes with neighbours.
Log everything
Every time something is moved, a snide comment is made, a lie is told, write it down. It is then far harder for him to shrug it off when you manager sees it as "one or two comments being taken out of context"
HTH
Jambo
Flamin_Squirrel
26-02-08, 01:54 PM
Failing that, invest in a dictaphone.
Put your mobile phone on record when you go past, see if you can pick it up and use it against him.
Failing that, burst the mofos tyres all round ;)
Failing that, invest in a dictaphone.
It's better to use your fingers whilst in the office.
Log everything
Every time something is moved, a snide comment is made, a lie is told, write it down. It is then far harder for him to shrug it off when you manager sees it as "one or two comments being taken out of context"
Dan, I had a similar issue with one of my superiors in this job. As most folk on the org know, I don't take workplace issues laying down.
So, as Jambo has said, I logged everything, even if it wasn't to do with the person in question, it got logged. Half of the time I was logging things thinking "I'll never need to come back to this, but it's worth noting just in case it comes in handy in the future."
My method of choice was sending an email to my GMail account (plenty of storage there), and my GMail account was setup to auto-label and auto-archive mails with a certain keyword in the subject ("WorkLog" as it happens).
Then he sent an email to our entire team, which I interpreted as a snide comment towards me. It was an underhand type of comment, the type where most people wouldn't give it a second thought, but a couple of other people in the office have noticed what has happened, and they mentionned it to me too.
This resulted in me printing the email, and having a chat with my manager (this guys superior). Of course, he didn't believe me at first, so I told him about the log that I'd been keeping, and would he like to view it? He did, so I showed him.
The result, I've been moved to a different team with nothing to do with that person. My job hasn't changed much, and in fact, I'm actually working on the team I was originally employed to be on. There have also been other structural changes within the office meaning that staff can be more closely monitored.
I'm with Jambo, log everything, then when you really do need to complain, you come at them with a big gun!
gettin2dizzy
26-02-08, 06:04 PM
Just bring it up in a meeting/mention it in a place where everyone can hear so he knows everyone is aware of it. Failing that, **** his mother.
Miss Alpinestarhero
26-02-08, 06:08 PM
I am having a few problems at work at the moment with a certain individual.
Now he's the worlds biggest loser and I have nothing but utter contempt for him.
Recently we fell out because I ordered an item to his exact spec, but it was wrong. I told him I was trying to help and he called me a tw**. I lost my rag and told him I am not standing for abuse for helping out a colleague and told him to organise himself.
Anyway since then he has kept dropping comments everytime we pass in the office, then denies it when I confront him. I have had my time card hidden.
When I go past his unit I get verbally abused. He has also lied to my work friends about me. Its all about stirring things up.
No don't get me wrong, I am not a wimp of any sort or would normally go down this route, however knocking seven bales of sh** out of him would probably lose me my job. And I haven't got time to lower to his level.
So i have decided to lodge a complaint of work place harrasement to shake him up. I won't fully persue it I just want him to sweat a bit. Do I have enough to warrant a case, although there's no evidence.
What's everyones thoughts?:smt100
Its interesting you ask this because I was thinking the exact same thing in relation to my job. I too have one particular individual whos behaviour makes me feel 'picked' on.
I dont think anyone else has managed to make me cry 3 times in one week :(
Maria
Just bring it up in a meeting/mention it in a place where everyone can hear so he knows everyone is aware of it. Failing that, **** his mother.
LOL. ! i like it":smt081:smt038
Warthog
26-02-08, 06:09 PM
Failing that, **** his mother.
Hehehehe
Seriously, I would try to collect evidence, then go to his boss.
Its interesting you ask this because I was thinking the exact same thing in relation to my job. I too have one particular individual whos behaviour makes me feel 'picked' on.
I dont think anyone else has managed to make me cry 3 times in one week :(
Maria
:grouphug: Thats just plain nasty! No one should have to feel subjected to crying from a colleague at work (group hug for u)
Have they got a phone number? we could play some pranks on them:p
Miss Alpinestarhero
26-02-08, 06:16 PM
:grouphug: Thats just plain nasty! No one should have to feel subjected to crying from a colleague at work (group hug for u)
Have they got a phone number? we could play some pranks on them:p
lol cheers for the hug :D
*has visions of phonejacker* :p
Maria
Nostrils
26-02-08, 07:43 PM
Jambo +1 - I would also check with HR or your contract (which you should have!) detailing what your company regards as bullying. Bullying in the office is a big thing and not always picked up because many senior personnel are the ones doing it. Dont forget that if you make it official with the company, they are duty bound to investigate and offer you their findings in writing, if they dont, they too can be seen as part of the problem which in the end could result in Constructive Dismissal and seeing them in court!!
The link below is something to chew over
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Employment/Employees/DiscriminationAtWork/DG_10026670
Good Luck
seedy100
26-02-08, 07:59 PM
Jambo and Balph are spot on.
Keep a log, note all the comments, dates, times etc.
When you write the comments down you may well find that there is more than one interpratation of the meaning. If so also write down your interpratation, at the time.
These form "contemperanious notes" which will be given more weight than explanations given at a later date.
When there are witnesses, even if they may not have been aware of the significance of what they see/hear make a record of who was present.
You will need at lease a dozen or so incidents.
Dont "go off half cocked" as they say. Make sure you have plenty of evidence, otherwise your manager may have an excuse to fudge the issue.
Also ensure that the other party does not find out what you are doing - so dont tell anyone or leave the log lying around.
As a coping stratergy in the mean time just think that every comment or remark that you have to put up with is another nail in the coffin.
HTH
Good luck with it.
Wideboy
26-02-08, 08:06 PM
i had the same thing at work, words where exchanged and he squared up to me, threatened to take me outside ECT and i started laughing, i had more satisfaction out of laughing and winding him up than i would have punching him square on the the nose :D
but we get along now :scratch:
Dictaphone would be a great idea but don't go handing in the evidence until you have him saying something really bad, that way you can get him into some serious trouble and not just a slap on the wrist.
Hi DanDare,
I'm an employment tribunal representative and have dealt with many cases including grievances, harassment, victimisation and discirimniation. The advice that you've received so far is pretty good. Obviously, it's helpful if you have proof. However, this isn't always necessary. Your grievance is a "civil law" matter which means that your employer should make a decision based on the balance of probability. There is a statutory dispute procedure as per the Employment Act 2002. The first step is to put your complaint in writing, thereafter your employer must arrange a formal meeting. You have a right to have a witness or representative present (either someone you know whose an accredited trade union rep - he or she doesn't have to work for your employer - or a workmate.) Your employer must then issue you with a decision and if the decision is against you, your employer must allow a right of appeal.
It may be difficult to win through, but the situation you describe should be dealt with seriously by your employers (unless they're very stupid) as harassment claims can prove to be very expensive. There's much more to this than I've put here, if you PM me with your email address I can send you some useful info and help you prepare a case to put to your employer.
Jambo and Balph are spot on.
Keep a log, note all the comments, dates, times etc.
As a coping stratergy in the mean time just think that every comment or remark that you have to put up with is another nail in the coffin.
Jambo and who? :D
As for the coping strategy, mine was that I was giving him enough rope to hang himself with, which is basically the same as "speedy100" said. ;)
Biker Biggles
27-02-08, 11:45 AM
You could probably stop this very quickly by doing as advised and keeping a diary of the events.Rather than go straight to management with it I would confront the person with your diary and give them the option to behave.They should be made aware of the consequences of not doing so.This usually does the trick.
The reason I suggest doing it yourself first is that you will need to think about continuing to work in your normal environment after it is all sorted,and getting management involved will lead to formal proceedings which will cause longlasting feelings among all staff.My experience of management involvement in disputes among staff is that it should be an absolute last resort as the outcome is always bad for all concerned.Best sorted among peers if possible.
Its interesting you ask this because I was thinking the exact same thing in relation to my job. I too have one particular individual whos behaviour makes me feel 'picked' on.
I dont think anyone else has managed to make me cry 3 times in one week :(
Maria
What you need Maria is a group of big hairy bikers to come and meet you after work and mock and jeer the creep/creepess, along with something that may or may not be construed as threatening behaviour. Or you can do a little wee in his mug and every time you see him/her you'll snigger. Or if it's a bloke imagine him naked dancing to the sound of music.
As for the main topic I'd do what everyone else has said. If your Manager or his Manager is funny and tries to dismiss it be prepaired to go over his head. When you get the evidence just do it. Have a stiff drink first at lunch time if you're nervous. Work is a huge part of many people's lives and it shouldn't be spoiled by anyone.
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