Tris
23-04-08, 07:18 AM
Sorry if you have seen this before, but they made me laugh :D:D
SWAMP DONKEY
A deeply unattractive person
TESTICULATING.
Waving your arms around and talking bo%%ocks
BLAMESTORMING.
Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or aproject failed, and who was responsible
SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, cr%ps on everything, and then leaves
SALMON DAY.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get scr$&ed and die.
CUBE FARM.
An office filled with cubicles
PRAIRIE DOGGING.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake
SINBAD.
Single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate
PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
The fine art of whacking the cr%p out of an electronic device to get it to work again
OH-NO SECOND.
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all')
JOHNNY-NO-STARS.
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent whoworks in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level of training
MILLENNIUM DOMES.
The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing
MONKEYBATH.
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: 'Oo! Oo! Oo!Aa! Aa! Aa!'
MYSTERY BUS.
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in thetoilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in
MYSTERY TAXI.
The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wakeup whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your bed instead
BEER COAT.
The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3:00am
BEER COMPASS.
The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how you got here, and where you've come from
TART FUEL.
Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women
TART CART.
Stretched Limo full of women on a hen night
PICASSO BUM.
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she'sgot 4 buttocks
SWAMP DONKEY
A deeply unattractive person
TESTICULATING.
Waving your arms around and talking bo%%ocks
BLAMESTORMING.
Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or aproject failed, and who was responsible
SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, cr%ps on everything, and then leaves
SALMON DAY.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get scr$&ed and die.
CUBE FARM.
An office filled with cubicles
PRAIRIE DOGGING.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake
SINBAD.
Single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate
PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
The fine art of whacking the cr%p out of an electronic device to get it to work again
OH-NO SECOND.
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all')
JOHNNY-NO-STARS.
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent whoworks in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level of training
MILLENNIUM DOMES.
The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing
MONKEYBATH.
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: 'Oo! Oo! Oo!Aa! Aa! Aa!'
MYSTERY BUS.
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in thetoilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in
MYSTERY TAXI.
The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wakeup whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your bed instead
BEER COAT.
The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3:00am
BEER COMPASS.
The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how you got here, and where you've come from
TART FUEL.
Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women
TART CART.
Stretched Limo full of women on a hen night
PICASSO BUM.
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she'sgot 4 buttocks