Disappointed in a friend

[Shellywoozle]

I have a good mate and I have recently found out that the friend has told some acquantaince some awful things about me saying I am a nut case and my head is a mess due to things that happened to me as a child. :confused:

I am livid what would you do if this was you?

I kinda want revenge but that is not my style, I feel hurt and let down.

I am a nut case mind but not cause I been messed with (which this part of my life I can't recall but it must have happened cause they said so ) :shock: that's down to being a Woozle

[Baph]

:grouphug:

TBH, my approach would be to talk to the 3rd party (the person that was told) and explain that they'd get less bull**** if they went to a cattle market!!

Then, just cut the guilty party out, have nothing to do with them. It's not worth the stress.

[Shellywoozle]

:grouphug:

TBH, my approach would be to talk to the 3rd party (the person that was told) and explain that they'd get less bull**** if they went to a cattle market!!

Then, just cut the guilty party out, have nothing to do with them. It's not worth the stress.

I have done exactly that but still hurts toknow that someone I thought alot of obviously hates me and thinks it funny to talk about me. I guess they didnt expect me to have an indepth chat with the 3rd party.

Fireworks day may be early this year

[Blue_SV650S]

I think your nutter-ness actually all stems back to that time I took you roughly from behind ... (by surprise) :D

[Shellywoozle]

I think your nutter-ness actually all stems back to that time I took you roughly from behind ... :D

Oh yeah it could have started from then ;) the affect you had on me baby

[Blue_SV650S]

Oh yeah it could have started from then ;) the affect you had on me baby

Well {trying to keep U-rated} 'it' rattled ya brain about a fair bit in the process didn't it!! :D

[Blue_SV650S]

p.s. Do you want me to repeat the process on your friend to 'learn' her like I did you!?!? :D

[Sean_C]

It takes a long time for me to tell people about myself/life/past in any detail.. A lot of talking and building trust. Should someone abuse that trust I'd be livid.. Have a think so that you can go and talk to both, say what you want to say, and get your point across without being irate.. Taking the time to think so you can calm down (twas days for me). Hope you sort things out ok..

[neio79]

confront him in front of all to show him up . See what he has to say then. Or ill get some mates and we will come up and have a word .

[Shellywoozle]

confront him in front of all to show him up . See what he has to say then. Or ill get some mates and we will come up and have a word .

Who said it was a he :smt026

I am hoping the fact I never speak to this friend again will upset them. The fact what they told the 3rd party sounds complete tosh and I am mad that they would want to make me look like a fruit and nut case to get them looking good.

What goes around comes around and it need have no influence by me.

Sean, at this moment in time I can't ever see myself calming down. But I am sure I will in time as I am a big softy and will end up feeling sorry for my mate (ex mate).

[Sean_C]

Never talking to somebody again is something I wouldn't find particularly difficult. Gets your point across, if you can do it ;)

[Speedy Claire]

Sorry to hear this Shell... can understand you feeling betrayed. Take a few days to calm down as has already been suggested. Then when you`re calmer approach this friend. Afterwards you will still probably never want to speak to him/her again but at least you will have let them know how disgusted you are in them x

[Shellywoozle]

Never talking to somebody again is something I wouldn't find particularly difficult. Gets your point across, if you can do it ;)

I have done this partially, then I got more information and I had already said my piece and good byes by then. I figured they can't respect me enough to do this to me so why should I let them know they have really hurt me.

Why do people manipulate others for their own means .. how cruel is that?

Sorry to hear this Shell... can understand you feeling betrayed. Take a few days to calm down as has already been suggested. Then when you`re calmer approach this friend. Afterwards you will still probably never want to speak to him/her again but at least you will have let them know how disgusted you are in them x


Yeah I may feel different in couple of days, when the Woozle has vented

[xXBADGERXx]

A shovel , a Dark night , and 10 acres of land .

[Paws]

BIGG BIGG huggs huni,
can me and you get anymore alike in certain things that have gone on in our life over the past year and bit LOL.
Its times like this you find out who your true mates are, ive been there (and am actually still going therough it), at end of dy someone is jealous as you have a better/happier life than what they have and they want to true and make you miserable, just ignore it- act like the adult 9even though we all know your a big kid) ;) amnd stay being yourself, loves ya just the way you are :) x

[phil24_7]

Name and address of said friend please, I'm sure I have some words of advice for them though I may not be very articulate with them!

[Shellywoozle]

BIGG BIGG huggs huni,
can me and you get anymore alike in certain things that have gone on in our life over the past year and bit LOL.
Its times like this you find out who your true mates are, ive been there (and am actually still going therough it), at end of dy someone is jealous as you have a better/happier life than what they have and they want to true and make you miserable, just ignore it- act like the aaadult 9even though we all know your a big kid) ;) amnd stay being yourself, loves ya just the way you are :) x


Aww Paws you just made me cry with that and your text. God knows why I am so upset, this is so not like me :( I think 2 hours talking to 3rd party has just about topped it all off, I have had to make myself say night to them as it was all too much.

We have pretty mirrored lives over the past year ain't we mate, difference being you have a wonderful caring man in your life and I have a mad dog. (some say they both the same LOL, men and dogs - not you Mat ya lovely ;))

Name and address of said friend please, I'm sure I have some words of advice for them though I may not be very articulate with them!

Aww fankoo but me would never disclose the ex mates details as I fear they will get what they deserve in life. I am not going to lower myself to their levels

[phil24_7]

Fair enough though the offer remains open!

Oh, and your probably better off with the mad dog, just ask Kate!!

[Paws]

Aww Paws you just made me cry with that and your text. God knows why I am so upset, this is so not like me :( I think 2 hours talking to 3rd party has just about topped it all off, I have had to make myself say night to them as it was all too much.

We have pretty mirrored lives over the past year ain't we mate, difference being you have a wonderful caring man in your life and I have a mad dog. (some say they both the same LOL, men and dogs - not you Mat ya lovely ;))



Your upset as someone you was close to has betrayed your trust and dragged (or tried to) your name through the mud for their own sad and selfish reasons, yer we have had alot of issues that are alike havent we lol, and trust me-i had to kiss ALOT of frogs (or should that be toads??) to get my prince ;) (ok i'll stop with the sloppy stuff now), told ya-id swop matt for sammy-both snore, both hairy and both naughty LOL
Dont cry sweetie and dont let it get you down, your a bright and bubbley lass and we loves ya that way :kiss:, if you dare to change i'd be forced to slap ya ;)

[Shellywoozle]

Your upset as someone you was close to has betrayed your trust and dragged (or tried to) your name through the mud for their own sad and selfish reasons, yer we have had alot of issues that are alike havent we lol, and trust me-i had to kiss ALOT of frogs (or should that be toads??) to get my prince ;) (ok i'll stop with the sloppy stuff now), told ya-id swop matt for sammy-both snore, both hairy and both naughty LOL
Dont cry sweetie and dont let it get you down, your a bright and bubbley lass and we loves ya that way :kiss:, if you dare to change i'd be forced to slap ya ;)

Oh I will hold you to that slap. I may enjoy it LOL.

Although I may be smiling again on Friday as I have a date with a biker mate (not an orger) who has been after me for ages. I have decided, if for the wrong reasons I don't care, to give in and see him. He is lovely and I put him off as I didnt have time for a bloke. For some unknown reason he has not given up the chase and he won ! Shell gave in to a man and I hope he can cheer me up and make me smile and forget my hassle.

I shall keep ya's updated ;)

[MiniMatt]

First off before you go cutting off friendships it's surely worth double checking we haven't just got wires crossed here. Sounds like you're going on third hand information here and perhaps it's worth giving your friend the benefit of the doubt first? I agree that true friends wouldn't do that to you, but I also know that true friends balls things up from time to time.

As a potential scenario, is it possible that third party said something like "Shell went off on one over something completely innocuous I said", and your friend said "Go easy on her, she had a rough childhood that involved nasty scenario X/Y/Z", chinese whispers develop and somehow the impression gathered is that your friend has been telling stories and spilling personal sensitive confidences.

[Shellywoozle]

First off before you go cutting off friendships it's surely worth double checking we haven't just got wires crossed here. Sounds like you're going on third hand information here and perhaps it's worth giving your friend the benefit of the doubt first? I agree that true friends wouldn't do that to you, but I also know that true friends balls things up from time to time.

As a potential scenario, is it possible that third party said something like "Shell went off on one over something completely innocuous I said", and your friend said "Go easy on her, she had a rough childhood that involved nasty scenario X/Y/Z", chinese whispers develop and somehow the impression gathered is that your friend has been telling stories and spilling personal sensitive confidences.

I will give the friend a chance to explain but I am going to hide some info I know for defo and see how they play it. Like keeping crucial evidence from a defense solicitor in interview and watching their client crumble in front of them :) ha ha ha I feel cruel as I am hurting, is that bad LOL

[TazDaz]

Shelly - if you know 100% what's been said and you didn't like it, I'd assess whether it's worth spending time trying to talk to him/her. Is what's been said something which can be brushed under the carpet and forgotten about? If it isn't then it's going to be hard to continue the relationship anyways, so might be best to call it quits.

[Shellywoozle]

Shelly - if you know 100% what's been said and you didn't like it, I'd assess whether it's worth spending time trying to talk to him/her. Is what's been said something which can be brushed under the carpet and forgotten about? If it isn't then it's going to be hard to continue the relationship anyways, so might be best to call it quits.

No it can't be brushed under the carpet, I suppose all I want is to know why they did it. But I think you are right, calling it quits is the best.

Gutted but I have plenty of mates who I know are true.

[Lozzo]

I think your nutter-ness actually all stems back to that time I took you roughly from behind ... (by surprise) :D

You too huh?

Blimey, she must have it bad then.

[Lozzo]

A shovel , a Dark night , and 10 acres of land .


And two sacks of lime powder

[Dangerous Dave]

Confront your friend....

[Tara]

Confront your friend....
+1 with that listen to what they say first

[RichT]

I'd be mad, but prob feel sad for said friend and cut them out (at least for a while).

If the most important thing in his/her life is to gossip about your personal matters, those that were intrusted to them, then they're either sad, lacking in sensitivity/compassion or simply thoughtless.

Next time you see him/her. Tell them you're really disappointed in them and leave it at that. Cut them out for a while, until they have properly appologised. If not, it's their loss.

[clanger]

Nah...it wouldn't bother me too much, it's not worth wasting time thinking about. Although if it is worrying you, perhaps you should either a) ask the offending friend about it outright, or b) don't tell them anything else about you from now onwards, c) invent something really juicy and tell them and see how long it takes to get back to you...thus making it really funny!

[stewie]

Thats the trouble with friends, it hurts more when one lets you down like this, Id confront them and get the truth out of em and take it from there, good luck with it :D

[silverelephant]

I agree with what many have already said, confront your "friend" and give them the opportunity to give their side of the story - is it possible that the 3rd party is the one doing the stirring??

Try and be calm and see what they have to say, if you don't like it or don't believe them, that's when you make the decision whether to cut them out. Betrayal is such a horrible thing to experience and I can only say from my own personal experience that if you feel yourself missing them, just remember what they've done, it gets easier. (Being a Scorpio helps as I can hold a grudge for yeeeeeears haha)

Can't make any comments on your nuttiness as I don't know you but you're not alone lol :smt026 Hugs x

[Geoffrey]

Confront your friend....
+ 1, if they do not understand you are not pleased with them they may think it is ok to do it again.

[Shellywoozle]

Just read all your replies thank you for your advice. I didnt sleep much last night and I am finding it hard to work out fact from fiction in all this.

I tried to call my friend this morning and the phone was off, which made me fear something bad may have happened and that started me thinking into how much they mean to me and how I would miss them. I am a big softy and don't hold grudges and I figured life is too short. Maybe I have just calmed down, but I finally made contact and are going to meet up.

I have no intentions of arguing, I just want to hear the truth even if it is bad and I won't like it. Suppose I should forgive and be the better person.

I know my friend is hurting by what they have done and they have said sorry.

big hugs back to you all - fankoo xx

[Dangerous Dave]

I hope it works out.

[missyburd]

He/she'll get their comeuppance, tis a disgusting way to treat a friend and betray them like that. I personally wouldn't confront them as I'd be in danger of going completely off on one and no doubt saying something I'd regret, the silent treatment is usually a good bet. However, if you've only heard this from someone else then, as people have said, tis only fair to give them a chance. Only the one chance mind!

Hope you can start feeling better about it soon, this sort of thing is horrible to deal/cope/try and forget about #hug#

[Shellywoozle]

Well we have made up, I have listened to my mate's side and they are in bits. They are genuinly sorry and have admitted to the majority, maybe 3rd party did a bit of stirring.

Funny thing is I never shouted, never questioned the honesty and acted how I would not normally act in these situations. I used to be fiesty and firey, maybe I am calming down a bit - things will be forgotten as life is too short.

I am still hurting but in time those feelings will pass. But if they ever hurt me again I will not be so nice next time LOL

Hoping I can sleep tonight now and I may actually do some work tomorrow instead of day dreaming and getting angry !

Thanks all I needed to vent last night and you helped ! XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[xXBADGERXx]

Hopefully a Happy ending , if they hurt you again , then HUNT THEM DOWN :D

[Shellywoozle]

Hopefully a Happy ending , if they hurt you again , then HUNT THEM DOWN :D

Oh don't worry they won't get a 2nd chance and I WILL let them know they messed with the wrong Woozle LOL

But we all make mistakes, I made enough in my past. Anyway I have sown my mates gob up with rusty fishing wire so no more jackanories.

[xXBADGERXx]

Nobody gets a second chance with me I`m afraid to say . I keep very good friends around me who have never said a word out of turn apart from Banter :D . The last person that crossed me ended up moving away from the area ...... I suppose it was a case of that or get dangled over a rather large cliff ........ but anyway , enough of that :D

[G]

Black bike.....black clothing....menacing helmet......loud can revving at 2 in the morning at the end of their drive....show them who's boss lol

[Shellywoozle]

Nobody gets a second chance with me I`m afraid to say . I keep very good friends around me who have never said a word out of turn apart from Banter :D . The last person that crossed me ended up moving away from the area ...... I suppose it was a case of that or get dangled over a rather large cliff ........ but anyway , enough of that :D

Wasnt rusty fishing wire bad enuf :shock: I not got the strength to dangle noone nowhere lol

[Shellywoozle]

Black bike.....black clothing....menacing helmet......loud can revving at 2 in the morning at the end of their drive....show them who's boss lol

pmsl ---- he he good idea ;)

[kwak zzr]

Funny thing is I never shouted, never questioned the honesty and acted how I would not normally act in these situations.

mm you must be mellowing hunnie.

[Shellywoozle]

mm you must be mellowing hunnie.

Yeah maybe ! They got off lightly that's all I can say !

Anyway what ya mean you not seen any other side than a mellow Shell, oh but maybe when you hear my road rage LOL that's showing fiesty me

[xXBADGERXx]

I not got the strength to dangle noone nowhere lol

I have , and I have Dangled a few people by their necks , tends to get the message across nicely ......... anyone remember the beginning of Star Wars where Darth Vader dangles that rebel commander ? LOL (B<

[kwak zzr]

Anyway what ya mean you not seen any other side than a mellow Shell, oh but maybe when you hear my road rage LOL that's showing fiesty me


mmm road rage yea seem to remember that, didn't you want to re arrange someones face lol

[Shellywoozle]

mmm road rage yea seem to remember that, didn't you want to re arrange someones face lol

Yea but again they deserved it, overtaking me doing 45mph ;) in a 40mph zone whilst I was wearing my uniform gong past grinning at me, then driving like a *unt in front of me. So he gets a flash of me warrant card.

He then makes the poor devil in front of him pull over so he goes for the overtake just missing an on coming car, with me behind furious.

And for the record yes Daz heard it as i was on HANDS FREE !!

I was furious I was gonna go and have words with him at the next set of traffic lights, he only did it cause he saw my uniform.

[kwak zzr]

you'll spot him again someday hun when your in your panda on duty :)

[Shellywoozle]

you'll spot him again someday hun when your in your panda on duty :)

Mmmm thats gonna be ages away :( but I don't forget so one day ! LOL

[Lozzo]

Anyway what ya mean you not seen any other side than a mellow Shell, oh but maybe when you hear my road rage LOL that's showing fiesty me

I've been in a car with you driving, that was scary enough :D

[yorkie_chris]

Yeah yeah.

More importantly, whens the Paws-Woozle spanking thread going up?

[Lozzo]

Will there be a live streaming webcam?

[Paws]

Yeah yeah.

More importantly, whens the Paws-Woozle spanking thread going up?


lol, whens shes naughty again hey shell ;),
nahh i love shell to bits as a v good mate, we both went through alot at the same time and scarily enough it was same things :o, shes re-built my confidence in female friends and her and treacle get on well :cool: (hes our bbq chef-so has some uses LOL) :kiss:

Glad your sorted shell huni :)

[Shellywoozle]

I've been in a car with you driving, that was scary enough :D

What was wrong with my driving !!! Come on out with it

lol, whens shes naughty again hey shell ;),
nahh i love shell to bits as a v good mate, we both went through alot at the same time and scarily enough it was same things :o, shes re-built my confidence in female friends and her and treacle get on well :cool: (hes our bbq chef-so has some uses LOL) :kiss:

Glad your sorted shell huni :)


Cheers hun, I have to say I find it hard to be good mates with girlies coz of their general bitchyness but you my dear are not like that at all. We are very similar in alot of respects, probably why we hit it off.

Love ya too and Treacle xx my car seat still aint mended Matt LOL

[silverelephant]

So glad to hear you got this all sorted out and well done for staying calm x

[phil24_7]

Woozle, your a big soft mattress, wrapped in cotton wool in a pool full of feathers, that's how soft you are!!

Glad everything's good and fingers crossed you never have to go through anything like that again with either this friend or any other for that matter.

XxX

[kwak zzr]

What was wrong with my driving !!! Come on out with it


you drive too fast!!!!!! woozle Mc Rae!!!!

[Shellywoozle]

you drive too fast!!!!!! woozle Mc Rae!!!!

Who says safe aint I?

Shame I ain't a bit fast on 2 wheels hey LOL

Look what Lozzo has started, I am gonna get ya Lozzo you just wait til I see ya LOL

Thanks silverEfalump, I mean silverelephant and Phil24_7 LOL. I am big puddy cat really :)

[Lou M]

And, when is/was your date? How did it go??

[Shellywoozle]

And, when is/was your date? How did it go??

It's tomorrow night :shock:

[kwak zzr]

I am big puddy cat really :)


id say more lioness:smt047

[Shellywoozle]

id say more lioness:smt047

Explain !

[Paws]

Treacle xx my car seat still aint mended Matt LOL

That a hint that you need him back up there with his tool kit to fix it?? :D;)

[Shellywoozle]

That a hint that you need him back up there with his tool kit to fix it?? :D;)

No I have a mechanic that is meant to be doing a back hander but he just hasnt bothered. I have the part in my boot, been there a few days after you came down LOL.

I just not moved that seat since Matt moved it back LOL. No sex for me in that seat on Friday LOL ha ha (Joke)

[Baph]

No I have a mechanic that is meant to be doing a back hander
You still talking about tomorrow night there? :shock:

[Shellywoozle]

You still talking about tomorrow night there? :shock:

No fraid not

[kwak zzr]

get him to fix ya car shell hehe

[Shellywoozle]

get him to fix ya car shell hehe

Nah I get me mechanic to do it, rather pay someone, you know what I am like people doing me favours. Anyway, he won't be here long, he gotta go work at 11pm.

[kwak zzr]

good look hunnie hope all goes well, if you need a get out phone call just gimme a text hehehe joke, enjoy.

[Shellywoozle]

good look hunnie hope all goes well, if you need a get out phone call just gimme a text hehehe joke, enjoy.

OK ta hun! He he he I should be OK seen him plenty of times before, LOL I keep thinking of the last time we met ha ha ha. Bless him he is a a lovely bloke, must be for putting up with me and all the pushing away I done :o awwww. Bonus he a biker too !

[silverelephant]

silverefalump, I like it :D

soooo, how'd it go??

[Shellywoozle]

silverefalump, I like it :D

soooo, how'd it go??

Sorry that's what I call elephants he he efalumps, never had to spell it tho !

Date, well lets just say I can't go into detail on the org as I don't want to appear to be misjudging the poor guy, but from a few things he said to me I will not be seeing him again. It was nothing personal about me but alarm bells rang as to his "personal interests" and due to my job I need to go with my gut instincts. He was only interested in watching TV and any conversation was instigated by me, I was bored to say the least LOL

Na yawn yawn yawn all the way LOL ..... and he smokes and I forgot about how much I hate smokers breath ! Sorry for all your smokers but for a non smoker it's an acquired taste ....... you smell it a mile of :(

[xXBADGERXx]

Sounds like a "Catch" ....... NOT :D

[Shellywoozle]

Sounds like a "Catch" ....... NOT :D

LOL ha ha ... at one point he even said to me "get out of copper mode", it was the shocked look on my face when he said something I couldnt believe he said LOL

God I pick em.

Where are all the nice men? I must be such a nasty nasty person LOL ha ha ha noone loves me :rolleyes:

[xXBADGERXx]

<---------- Passes the Worms over

[Shellywoozle]

<---------- Passes the Worms over


LOL :) hellllllllppppppppppppppppppppppp

[xXBADGERXx]

~~~~~~~~~0 <---- Lunch

[Iansv II]

Where are all the nice men? I must be such a nasty nasty person LOL ha ha ha noone loves me :rolleyes:

sorry, I'm taken now.... carry on :p

[silverelephant]

Awww sorry to hear it didn't go well!! There are good ones out there and you'll find one when you least expect it, although I suppose that doesn't help much when you've just had to endure a bad date, soz!