View Full Version : Help
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 02:37 PM
I`m at this minute working away in my office on my own except for some computer boffin who`s here to install our new operating system. I`m not a violent person but
I WANT TO KILL HIM
He`s driving me mad cos he`s chewing gum (don`t have a problem with that) but it`s the noises he`s making. He`s absolutely disgusting and I think I`m gonna scream. As well as that he keeps peering over the terminal and staring at my boobs. When I make eye contact with him you`d think he`d have the decency to turn away knowing that I`ve copped him looking but no.... he pushes his specs up his nose, carries on staring and chewing. The noises are making me feel ill. How can I gently drop a hint to chew his gum quietly or should I go straight for a butter knife in the neck?
the_lone_wolf
09-02-09, 02:42 PM
kidnap him claire
someone with your medical experience should be able to keep him on the brink of death for weeks...
El Saxo
09-02-09, 02:44 PM
Shout 'stop staring at my t*ts' loud enough for the office to hear and hopefully the shock / embarrassment should cause him to swallow the gum by mistake - 2 birds with one stone! :takeabow:
EDIT - just re-read your OP and noticed the 'working on your own' bit. :oops:
Start staring at his c0ck
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 02:46 PM
Shout 'stop staring at my t*ts' loud enough for the office to hear and hopefully the shock / embarrassment should cause him to swallow the gum by mistake - 2 birds with one stone! :takeabow:
Yes i`m liking this idea but cos i`m on my own in here theres no-one else to hear me shout!
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 02:47 PM
kidnap him claire
someone with your medical experience should be able to keep him on the brink of death for weeks...
Also like this idea.... Kathy Bates and Misery comes to mind
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 02:47 PM
Start staring at his c0ck
Ed I`m feeling sick enough as it is!!!!!! :(
Yuck, yuck yuck
El Saxo
09-02-09, 02:48 PM
Yes i`m liking this idea but cos i`m on my own in here theres no-one else to hear me shout!
hehe, just realised that myself, see above :lol:
Kate Moss
09-02-09, 02:50 PM
say " come here, got something funny to show you" - then show him this thread!
:smt018
dizzyblonde
09-02-09, 02:52 PM
http://slog.thestranger.com/files/2007/05/Monkey_Nerd_with_Glasses.jpg
is this him?:mrgreen:
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 02:54 PM
http://slog.thestranger.com/files/2007/05/Monkey_Nerd_with_Glasses.jpg
is this him?:mrgreen:
lmao...... thats him Lou. Except for the fact that he`s wearing a navy blue and white gingham shirt, buttoned to the top and no tie
dizzyblonde
09-02-09, 02:56 PM
lmao...... thats him Lou. Except for the fact that he`s wearing a navy blue and white gingham shirt, buttoned to the top and no tie
http://www.terrapass.com/images/blogposts/nerd200.jpg
oh then this will be him for sure
Claire, I too cannot stand to hear people chewing gum!!! Why don't you threaten him with a Lynx can :twisted: if he doesn't stop doing those things.
Or alternatively if you have some gum in a box to hand do what that woman did with the Brazil nuts* and then offer him a 'fresh one' LMAO!!
*Sorry, didn't mean to remind you of the Brazil Nuts ;)
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 03:00 PM
http://www.terrapass.com/images/blogposts/nerd200.jpg
oh then this will be him for sure
Wow thats him!!! the spitting image
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 03:00 PM
Claire, I too cannot stand to hear people chewing gum!!! Why don't you threaten him with a Lynx can :twisted: if he doesn't stop doing those things.
Or alternatively if you have some gum in a box to hand do what that woman did with the Brazil nuts* and then offer him a 'fresh one' LMAO!!
*Sorry, didn't mean to remind you of the Brazil Nuts ;)
lmao... i`ll go and ask one of the male nurses if they have any lynx with them... thats a very good suggestion! whilst i`m gone i`m gonna leave this page open on my terminal and hope he reads it
timwilky
09-02-09, 03:05 PM
flash your bird bits at him if he is so interested. A real pair will probably scare him out of the building and leave him scared for life
First, take it as a complement that your physical beauty is irresistible to all men.
Secondly, make him a cup of tea but add some laxatives and knock out drugs. When he is out cold take him to the X ray lab and take 50 X rays of this manhood.
So when he wakes up he will of **** his pants and never be able to reproduce.
the_lone_wolf
09-02-09, 03:22 PM
Also like this idea.... Kathy Bates and Misery comes to mind
i was thinking more like pulp fiction:mrgreen:
Kilted Ginger
09-02-09, 03:23 PM
Ask him politely if he would mind getting rid of the gum and stop staring at your breasts as it it making you uncomfortable, the direct approach is often the best.
JamesMio
09-02-09, 03:28 PM
Ask him politely if he would mind getting rid of the gum and stop staring at your breasts as it it making you uncomfortable, the direct approach is often the best.
Then drop kick him in the face anyway.
Luckypants
09-02-09, 03:34 PM
liking the pic-lax in the tea idea :D
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 03:42 PM
I`m liking all of these suggestions as it`s giving me images of him in my head with various knives and implements sticking out of him. Picolax also a nice thought lol
I`m thinking that the direct approach might be a good one and I`m currently working up the nerve to do it.
the_lone_wolf
09-02-09, 03:50 PM
I`m thinking that the direct approach might be a good one and I`m currently working up the nerve to do it.
give the guy some credit, if you're wearing a naughty nursy costume any red blooded bloke would be glancing;)
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 03:53 PM
My nursing uniform is sedate and covers all it should so there :p
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 04:23 PM
Yay I`ve been very brave.
He was asking me a question and looking straight at my boobs whilst talking to me. I said to him "could you please look at me whilst your talking to me, it makes me feel very uncomfortable that your looking at my breasts"!!!
He turned the colour of beetroot lmao.
He`s still chewing tho and making me sick that way
Yay I`ve been very brave.
He was asking me a question and looking straight at my boobs whilst talking to me. I said to him "could you please look at me whilst your talking to me, it makes me feel very uncomfortable that your looking at my breasts"!!!
He turned the colour of beetroot lmao.
He`s still chewing tho and making me sick that way
LMAO, now hand him the bin and tell him to kindly place his gum in it :D
dizzyblonde
09-02-09, 04:41 PM
LMAO, now hand him the bin and tell him to kindly place his gum in it :D
oh matron:mrgreen: anything you say ..lol
i can just imagine that red faced git doing anything for clare now!
the_lone_wolf
09-02-09, 04:47 PM
My nursing uniform is sedate and covers all it should so there :p
http://www.grahammccann.co.uk/mediac/400_0/media/carry~on~doctor~2.jpg
oooh matron;)
missyburd
09-02-09, 04:51 PM
LOL funny thread. Glad you've managed to put him in his place :cool:
Now get a nursey friend to stand near him and have a conversation with her about how chewing gum has been proven to cause brain damage and erectile dysfunction, not to mention turning your tongue green :-D
Speedy Claire
09-02-09, 05:50 PM
lmao and oi I look nothing like Hatti Jacques (erm at least I don`t think I do!!!)
I didn`t need to ask him to place his chewing gum in the bin as he left shortly afterwards and I had to open the window cos of the heat radiating from his face but cos I was feeling confident and empowered I was gonna hand him the bin and say "would you like this for your chewing gum" lol
Luckypants
09-02-09, 06:13 PM
good on you hun!:mrgreen:
I had a similar situ where I used to work (with the boob staring not chewing gum) so I said to the chap, could you talk to the face cos the boobs aren't listening.
He too went beetroot and walked off. He struggled to ever talk to me again, which was difficult as we worked in the same office!!!
LOL!!! For some reason I'm surprised you didn't tell him that first time round :D
I'd love to witness the scene though!!!
Speedy Claire
10-02-09, 09:28 AM
ok we`ll recreate it, any computer geeks available??? :smt024
the_lone_wolf
10-02-09, 09:59 AM
I'd love to witness the scene though!!!
perv:o
Start staring at his c0ck
lmao
Dave20046
10-02-09, 10:52 AM
I`m at this minute working away in my office on my own except for some computer boffin who`s here to install our new operating system. I`m not a violent person but
I WANT TO KILL HIM
He`s driving me mad cos he`s chewing gum (don`t have a problem with that) but it`s the noises he`s making. He`s absolutely disgusting and I think I`m gonna scream. As well as that he keeps peering over the terminal and staring at my boobs. When I make eye contact with him you`d think he`d have the decency to turn away knowing that I`ve copped him looking but no.... he pushes his specs up his nose, carries on staring and chewing. The noises are making me feel ill. How can I gently drop a hint to chew his gum quietly or should I go straight for a butter knife in the neck?
That's me! :o
Dave20046
10-02-09, 10:53 AM
Yay I`ve been very brave.
He was asking me a question and looking straight at my boobs whilst talking to me. I said to him "could you please look at me whilst your talking to me, it makes me feel very uncomfortable that your looking at my breasts"!!!
He turned the colour of beetroot lmao.
He`s still chewing tho and making me sick that way
I didn't know you lot could tell...
well done speedy. should have asked if he had a good enough view or did he want you to unbutton some more. lol but saying that I wouldnt have the nerve to do that, well maybe lol
Speedy Claire
10-02-09, 02:41 PM
I didn't know you lot could tell...
lol if you`re as obvious as he was then YES!!!
Speedy Claire
10-02-09, 02:42 PM
well done speedy. should have asked if he had a good enough view or did he want you to unbutton some more. lol but saying that I wouldnt have the nerve to do that, well maybe lol
lol.... it took me ages to summon up the courage :D
timwilky
10-02-09, 02:45 PM
Reminds me of when I nearly got in trouble at work.
Lisa was a game lass with a lovely set of attributes, so one day I say.
"Oi Lisa, bet I can make your boobs wobble without touching them"
"No way"
"Ok I will put money on it, 10p says I can do it with just my psychic powers"
"No touching"
"No, pure psychic power"
"OK, your on"
So I wave my hands over them, under them, calling on my physic powers to make them wobble.
"Oh sod it, for 10p it is worth it as I give them a right good wobble". The whole office cracked up in laughter. I then thought whoops what have I done. am I going to get sacked, her husband thump me etc.
Good job she was a game lass and a while later I got to see the real things.
ok we`ll recreate it, any computer geeks available??? :smt024
Sorry not a geek :)
perv:o
Someone called?
Luckypants
10-02-09, 04:41 PM
Good job she was a game lass and a while later I got to see the real things.
Bet she would not have been game if she had caught you looking in her windows :twisted:
and that joke is almost as old as you! x
Well done Clare.
I always tell them to ask permission to stare first! The brave ones do, so I let them (briefly)!
the_lone_wolf
10-02-09, 05:23 PM
Well done Clare.
I always tell them to ask permission to stare first! The brave ones do, so I let them (briefly)!
**makes mental note for the AR**
:smt112
Dave20046
11-02-09, 08:45 AM
lol if you`re as obvious as he was then YES!!!
Well we all think we're not! I've recently found out you can also tell when we're trying extremely hard not to look.
Damned if I do damned if I don't :rolleyes:
Speedy Claire
11-02-09, 12:35 PM
Well done Clare.
I always tell them to ask permission to stare first! The brave ones do, so I let them (briefly)!
pmsl..... brilliant :D
gettin2dizzy
11-02-09, 12:40 PM
The IT department tend to have their own... aroma too ;)
Speedy Claire
11-02-09, 01:09 PM
The IT department tend to have their own... aroma too ;)
http://uploads.bikechat.net/Speedy Claire/puke.wmf
chris8886
11-02-09, 01:18 PM
As well as that he keeps peering over the terminal and staring at my boobs.
has anyone posted about this thread being useless without pictures? ;):p
Well done Clare.
I always tell them to ask permission to stare first! The brave ones do, so I let them (briefly)!
and i thought you were a responsible teacher... mum :p:smt083
Luckypants
11-02-09, 02:57 PM
has anyone posted about this thread being useless without pictures? ;):p
They are very nice :-D
http://i174.photobucket.com/albums/w111/luckypants_photos/Photo-0073e.jpg
chris8886
11-02-09, 03:09 PM
They are very nice :-D
http://i174.photobucket.com/albums/w111/luckypants_photos/Photo-0073e.jpg
you're as bad as a lady, you big tease! ;)
SoulKiss
11-02-09, 03:28 PM
**makes mental note for the AR**
:smt112
You will probably have to ask Bear to move his hands too tho.......
Yeah this thread did remind me that he refers to them as 'the community chest' Good job I don't take offense easily lol
Speedy Claire
11-02-09, 05:50 PM
They are very nice :-D
http://i174.photobucket.com/albums/w111/luckypants_photos/Photo-0073e.jpg
erm they`re actually Luckypants boobs :D
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