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gruntygiggles
12-03-09, 12:19 PM
Hi folks, I just watched an interview on This Morning with a woman that has suffered with anorexia for over 7 years and was given a choice of being sectioned or admitting herself to a residential clinic when she weighed just 5st 2lb.

Please bear with me, there is a point to this thread.

My family is still trying to make sense of my 16 year old cousin dying of anorexia three years ago and so this is a subject close to my heart. Ellen wanted to lose a few pounds for a school prom and it went from there. That was February and she died that August, she really did just stop eating. She would sometimes have 2 rich tea biscuits or 5 grapes a day and would measure out her water allowance.

Now.......She was 16 and we were constantly told that we could not force her into a home and the doctors always maintained that she needed to go on a body image programme. She saw the first GP that referred her to this in April and her referral came through two weeks before she died, at which point she had just been admitted to hospital at a little over 4 stone because she collapsed and her eye could no longer stay in the socket.

Despite beng chased up constantly, that referral was just way too late. her school nurses actually said that she'd grow out of it and the hospital staff would not tube feed her against her will because they did not understand the illness. She was a 16 year old on an adult Cardiac ward and the nurses just didn't have the training.

Pointless thread for most this may be, however, I have a question out there for parents or would be parents and it is this:-

If there was a charity set up for the families of children or adults with eating disorders that could offer practical and legal advice, not just telephone support, would you find that useful if you had a son or daughter suffering this or any other eating disorder?


I am not thinking of doing anything right now, but maybe in a year or two, with help, set something up so that people like my auntie don't have to just trust what the doctors are saying and can seek proper, impartial, legal advice.

The different GP's and nurses that had involvement with Ellen were all cautioned over their lack of action in Ellens case, but My auntie didn't want to take it any further. We have since been told that we could have forcefully taken Ellen to a phychiatrist and had her sectioned and the hospital SHOULD have referred her to a psychiatrist when she was admitted mid August. Because she was stuck on an adult cardiac ward, they did not have this knowledge and were going by the advice of if the patient refuses, you have to accept that.

We'll never get Ellen back and I'll never forget sitting with for an hour after she died because I didn't want her to be alone before going to the morgue.
If the system can so utterly fail a girl of just 16, what's to say this isn't happening all over with many families suffering through lack of knowledge and advice.

There are charities and organisations that offer advice on the subject, but all are unwilling to discuss the actual process of sectioning. They just tell you it's a final option and won't actually talk you through the process.
I'm not saying I would want all people with eating disorders sectioned, but for people like my aunt, all she needed was someone to say that she had the right to demand her GP refer Ellen to a psychiatrist and we may still have her with us now.

So.......would you wise guys and girls of the Org feel that setting up a more practical charity would be of benefit and something that I should indeed look into doing?

Thanks for any of your thoughts!

Rai86
12-03-09, 04:42 PM
I am not a parent or have had anybody i know gone thro this, so i cant relate too much...but readin your post nearly made me cry. I am so sorry you and your family have had to go thro this. And yes the system well and truly failed.

I think a practical charity guiding, not only the person that is suffering but also their friends and family thro the disorder would be a wonderful idea. And i am suprised there is not something already in place.

And group of people getting together to help others thro what they have been tho is a very commendable idea

Good luck and please give me a shout if you need any help fund raising. I have run alot of charity events and would be happy to help out

Rach

ophic
12-03-09, 04:53 PM
The charity is a great idea, but its existence should not be required, if it wasn't for the failings of the NHS. I'd support its existence though.

When you go for medical care, you expect to be looked after. You don't expect to have to keep pushing and shoving to get your problem dealt with properly. I fully understand why people don't want to go to their GP or hospital, cos you just end up with a load more stress and frustration - often starting with "where can i park?"

Messie
12-03-09, 04:54 PM
I am realy very sorry to hear about your cousin.
I'm sure you've heard of BEAT, based in Norfolk which is one of the older charities for all kinds of eating disorders. Also many organisations and charities for younger people have specialists who deal with eating disorders. I'm sure all of these would welcome your help, ideas and money.
Sectioning is a very complicated and difficult process which invloves the medical professiona nd the law. It's not a simple process to explain to anyone and it is by no means the final option. It can be done for varying lengths of time, from 24 hours to 6 months, and there has to be demonstrable threat to the health and well being of the patient or others. It is, after all, locking someone away.
I can PM you more info about this if you'd like
Sally

anna
12-03-09, 04:59 PM
Great idea ... just a quick question.. is there a reason why currently charities or organisations wont talk through the process of being sectioned? Do they have a legal reason or are they just protecting themselves?

londonlady
12-03-09, 05:19 PM
Wow...yeah i also watched this morning, very interesting/heart rending to watch. good luck with everything you hope to do and achieve with it :)




Good luck and please give me a shout if you need any help fund raising. I have run alot of charity events and would be happy to help out



what charity events have u run rai? cool

Rai86
12-03-09, 05:24 PM
what charity events have u run rai? cool

Mainly charity abseils and Tyroleans. Done it for many years now. And now i work for a charity full time - athlo in a different role

ArtyLady
12-03-09, 05:40 PM
I saw that too. I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your cousin, but yes AFAIK you can be sectioned if you are a danger to yourself or others - the hospital staff should have known that - it is unforgiveable :( and yes I think it would be a good and worthy venture.

Milky Bar Kid
12-03-09, 06:07 PM
Not had any direct experience of this but I think your charity would be greatly supported as eating disorders amongst young girls, and men, are so common these days.

I would certainly give to and support a charity such as the one you are proposing.

All the best x

gruntygiggles
12-03-09, 06:24 PM
I am not a parent or have had anybody i know gone thro this, so i cant relate too much...but readin your post nearly made me cry. I am so sorry you and your family have had to go thro this. And yes the system well and truly failed.

I think a practical charity guiding, not only the person that is suffering but also their friends and family thro the disorder would be a wonderful idea. And i am suprised there is not something already in place.

And group of people getting together to help others thro what they have been tho is a very commendable idea

Good luck and please give me a shout if you need any help fund raising. I have run alot of charity events and would be happy to help out

Rach

Thank you Rach, I will keep that in mind!

gruntygiggles
12-03-09, 06:39 PM
I am realy very sorry to hear about your cousin.
I'm sure you've heard of BEAT, based in Norfolk which is one of the older charities for all kinds of eating disorders. Also many organisations and charities for younger people have specialists who deal with eating disorders. I'm sure all of these would welcome your help, ideas and money.
Sectioning is a very complicated and difficult process which invloves the medical professiona nd the law. It's not a simple process to explain to anyone and it is by no means the final option. It can be done for varying lengths of time, from 24 hours to 6 months, and there has to be demonstrable threat to the health and well being of the patient or others. It is, after all, locking someone away.
I can PM you more info about this if you'd like
Sally

Thanks Sally,

My mum and I got in touch with BEAT, amongst other charities at the time and all were fantastic in supporting Ellen, but she just learned very quickly how to say the right thing. Her family, we that knew her better than anyone could see right through this and badgered the different charities for help and advice, even on practical things like, "what do we say when she refuses to eat" or "how do we deal with her when we find food in the bin".
All we were told was that we just have to let her know that she can talk to us, encourage her to eat, but not check on her or watch over her and rely on her GP for the correct care.

We needed more than that and when we called back to ask about having her sectioned after she was admitted to hospital, we were told that the doctors could do that for us, but when we asked the doctors, they said, go back to your GP and get a referral. Two weeks later Ellen died and it just never fails to amaze me how not one of those doctors thought that at just over 4 stone and in the state she was in, she wasn't seriously ill enough to warrant a direct and instant referral.

What I would like to do is either set up a new charitable organisation or give an add on service offering real advice and legal advice. What we needed at the time was for just one person to tell us how quickly we could have got Ellen sectioned. We now know that we could have had it done so that we could take the decision to have her tube fed while in hospital, but she was otherwise free in her decisions. We just wanted to save her life and suport her through everything else after that.

Thanks guys for your comments. It means a lot and maybe I will go forward with this idea towards the end of the year.

There are so many families going through this now and there will be many more in the future, so something has to be better than nothing in trying to help them all through it.

big hugs!!!

Cheryl x

Baph
12-03-09, 09:06 PM
GG, In response to your first post, as a parent, would I find a service such at as that useful? Yes.

As I'm sure your family have done, I'm confident that I'd use any resource available to get information/help should I ever be forced into that position.

My daughter has in the past expressed feelings that she wanted to loose weight, and she's only 8 and one of the slimmest kids in her school!! As I'm sure you can imagine, shocked wasn't the word! But luckily she talked to us about it before she did anything, and the issue went away naturally, though I'm fearful it could raise itself in future.

With that in mind, should you go ahead to setup anything (full on charity or just helping another charity), I'm more than happy to undertake as much IT related work as I have the time for to help you get setup and/or keep running. All work will be provided at cost if you want it doing. Either PM me on here whenever, or my MSN details are on my profile.

gruntygiggles
13-08-12, 02:01 PM
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gruntygiggles
13-08-12, 02:01 PM
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