Would you save a stranger? (TV programme)

[ThEGr33k]

Wow, there are some moving stories. Its quite scary really. :(

I cant believe people do stand by and let things happen. The bus one for example... WTF!?

Would you help?

I know its not a simple question, some situations are plain scary! :( I think if I knew how to handle myself (self defence) then id be more willing to help people in these situations... Problem being that in those situations its normally a group.

[svdemon]

The trouble is in this country you would end up getting done for assault for trying to help someone. Scary to think the way this country is going!!

[Baph]

I can't really comment on the given situations as I haven't seen the programme. When/what channel was it on??

If it's a medical situation, I'm generally there ready to jump in (and have done so in the past). Fighting, well, it depends TBH.

[Spiderman]

I can't really comment on the given situations as I haven't seen the programme. When/what channel was it on??

If it's a medical situation, I'm generally there ready to jump in (and have done so in the past). Fighting, well, it depends TBH.

IT@LL BE ON Ch4 +1 now if you wanna atch it. Pretty heavy stories tho.

Sadly ive both been on the attacked side and theby standers side so i can see it from both sides and you know what....neither is pretty.

Crime and punishment is a joke in this country in this day and age. That scumbag animal who punched a guy in a supermarket queue and killed him, the wrong guy at that, only gets 4 yrs. The sick biatch who put him up to it only gets 18months. For killing a man for gods sake. :roll:

I really do despair.

[Magnum]

Im watching it on channel 4 +1. Its only just started, but id like to think i WOULD help a stranger. Id put my life on the line to help someone.
That said, in a dangerous situation you may be in a different mind set.

[ThEGr33k]

IT@LL BE ON Ch4 +1 now if you wanna atch it. Pretty heavy stories tho.

Sadly ive both been on the attacked side and theby standers side so i can see it from both sides and you know what....neither is pretty.

Crime and punishment is a joke in this country in this day and age. That scumbag animal who punched a guy in a supermarket queue and killed him, the wrong guy at that, only gets 4 yrs. The sick biatch who put him up to it only gets 18months. For killing a man for gods sake. :roll:

I really do despair.


Aye... Its shocking!!!! What about the fact that speeding now gets you in not far off as much trouble!? =D>

[Baph]

Im watching it on channel 4 +1. Its only just started, but id like to think i WOULD help a stranger. Id put my life on the line to help someone.
That said, in a dangerous situation you may be in a different mind set.

I've worked in a few pubs, so from that mindset (I was pretty much in charge of security when we had no doorstaff - it was my job to keep order when things got rough), I'm confident I'd step in.

I agree with Spiderman though, neither side is pretty. In the pubs, I just used to get stuck in because that's what needed to be done. But I wouldn't advise anyone else ever consider it.

Typical example, a fight up the top of the front stairs of a pub I worked in. I was carrying plates at the time. So I put the plates on a table with customers on it, apologised to them, then sprinted over.

By this point, one guy was in a headlock & a couple of guys laying into him. I prized him free, only for him to stand up & smack me square in the chops. He then ran around pub, hitting a few other random people, and left. I went to the doors to see where he'd gone, only to see him coming back. So I stepped through the door, blocked & hit back, just in time for the cops to arrive.

It was only after (a couple of days after), I found out this guy was high as a kite & had killed someone in a pub around the corner.

Point is, from the outside of the situation, you can't tell what's happening, all you can do is split everyone up & then talk to them, if they'll talk to you.

[ThEGr33k]

It was only after (a couple of days after), I found out this guy was high as a kite & had killed someone in a pub around the corner.

Point is, from the outside of the situation, you can't tell what's happening, all you can do is split everyone up & then talk to them, if they'll talk to you.

DAMN! That sucks bad :(

Good example thought that you cant be sure what the crack is :(

[BanditPat]

I saw the end of it. It was quite nice to see the bald guy talking to the people that I assumed helped him. I'd like to think that i would help but for a stranger I don't know if i would. I did see a CCTV video in court while on work experience of a guy beating the absolute crapola out of some one in the street, in the middle of the day. the guy who got the beatings family were gutted when they saw it. And every one walked past and round it was fairly disgusting. I wasn't there for sentencing but im guessing he got next to nothing

[Holdup]

All comes down to how brave u feel really, id worry would i get more seriously hurt than the person they are attacking

[madness]

I watched the program last night and found it quite disturbing. I'd like to think that I would help someone, but until put in that sort of situation, I just don't know whether I would. I really hope that I never get to find out.
Society's attitude towards things like this needs to change, if no-one turned a blind eye, then attackers would think twice before attacking.

[Magnum]

I have a lot of respect for the man that tried to stop the armed robbers. He could have easily died that day. At the same time, he put his life on the line with a gun in his face whereas others on the bus completely ignored less dangerous attacks. If i was on the bus alone, to be honest i probably wouldnt confront a gang of 15 boys the same age as me but i would try and prompt others to help me.
The other case on the bus with the group of girls shows the scum we have in london. I would have definitely done something there. Most probably moved them out the way so the two victims could have got away.
That programme really angered me.

[Ceri JC]

I've not seen this, so the following is just on the general topic, rather than the program itself. The psychology of groups and witnesses means that the more there are of them, the less likely one of them will stop and help. Primarily for two reasons; they assume someone else will do it and they don't want to be the one to deviate from the group's default reaction of passive observation. If you are in need of help and a load of people are standing round, you are actually best off directing your cries of help at one particular individual than appealing to the group as a whole.

I know from numerous experiences that I am one of the people who do stop and help and frankly consider it a pretty poor reflection upon society and mankind in general that the majority of people don't.

[madness]

a pretty poor reflection upon society and mankind in general that the majority of people don't.

I'm in total agreement there. Society needs to start speaking and acting against the things that will ultimately cause it's downfall. We all moan about things, but fail to do anything to stop them happening.

[Miss Alpinestarhero]

I have a lot of respect for the man that tried to stop the armed robbers. He could have easily died that day.

That reminds me of a story i read in the newspaper a good few months ago - an elderly man stepped in and ripped a balaclavar off the face of a robber who was attempting to rob a jewelerry (sp?) store in broad daylight. The robber was so shocked he legged it :D well done to that old guy :D

Back to the topic -
Id like to think I would stop and help but it really does depend on the situation and the nature of it. If it was a group of men beating up someone then Id call the police because I would probably end up getting attacked as well. If it was a group of children picking on someone, Id step in (and I have done - poor girl was being bullied and having things flung at her on the bus).

Unfortunately due to the way society has gone (and is going), im much more inclined to not get directly invovled purely due to my own safety and fear of getting attacked / dragged in.

Maria

[Ceri JC]

Unfortunately due to the way society has gone (and is going), im much more inclined to not get directly invovled purely due to my own safety and fear of getting attacked / dragged in.


I wouldn't expect everyone to get involved in breaking up fisticuffs or preventing robberies, but there are plenty of scenarios those people could get involved in: helping at traffic accidents, people collapsing in the street, lost children, etc. from the sounds of it you would help at those and that is very admirable.

[plowsie]

Working at the pub. Bloke and his wife had been arguing in the bar for ages, we told them it was getting out time and that they had to leave. I checked with her she was okay, she smiled and lightly replied 'yeah'. Anyway, been nosey we could still hear them arguing outside, I stepped outside mainly to see if she was okay, she was in the car he was by the window and he was in the window shouting at her face. Next thing, he stepped slightly back and landed her one right in the chops. I was over there like a shot, she was bleeding and crying her eyes out trying to start the car, our manageress was not far behind and she had seen the lot, she got the lady out the car and saw to her, meanwhile I have confronted the bloke and pushed him away asking him WTF he thought he was doing...his reply "none of your business", 'fair reply mate, but why the **** do you think its right to hit her?', "I don't need to answer to you fatboy" with that he has tried to push me back and then swing for me. I landed him one on the chops and shouted how the **** do youlike it...and then as soon as that happened, security from the hotel over the road grabbed holt of me. The bloke came back for more but was restrained by two others from the pub.

On the return to the pub after all had calmed down, people were saying well done etc, the manageress however said "well done, but you do realise, this will be investigated". I was told to take holiday whilst the investigation was done, and was issued with a disciplinary hearing with the AM. There was footage of it from the car park but it was without sound, and it was unclear the bloke was shouting...Therefore I was issued with a written warning.

Looking back on it, I didn't know the full situation, only basics of what I sort....Was it stupid? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably not the way i dealt with it that time, however, put it like this - I will never stand by and let that sort of thing happen.

NEVER HIT A WOMAN.

Nowadays, I will always step in and try to stop violence whatever the background, whether the person deserves it or not.

[yorkie_chris]

I reckon you got a written warning because you said the wrong thing plowsie. You don't get f###ed over for what you've done in such a situation!

It's the sad thing about this country that you are more likely to get into bother doing the right thing than the people who go through their worthless lives consistently doing wrong.

And people wonder why anyone with sense has no respect for the forces of law and order in this country. I can understand when people enjoy having a dig at the police, I don't agree, but I understand. I think the establishment repeatedly showing themselves to be a bunch of c##ts might have something to do with it...

[metalangel]

When the missus and I were set upon by chavettes, loads of people watched but nobody lifted a finger to help us. And I was helpless to do anything as I knew I couldn't do anything but try and hold them off lest I get banged up for beating the **** out of a teenage girl (despite the fact she ****ing deserved it).

[flymo]

I would step in whenever I thought it necessary. If I deemed it too dangerous I might not wade in there but I wouldnt ignore it, I'ld be looking/calling for help from somebody.

How could anybody live with the guilt of walking past while somebody gets worked over or even killed?

On the subject of landing the wrong side of the law....If I thought it was the correct thing to do then I'ld do it, regardless of the consequences. Real interesting point from Baph though, in some cases you really do have no idea of the circumstances that started an attack.

[anna]

After working myself in a bar numerous times, as a female normally going to split a fight between two guys I would have more luck then the bouncers.

Saying that, in my last bar job there really wasn’t a Thursday or Friday night that at least once during the night I wouldn’t have to hit the "police panic" button. :plod:

Believe me during those times I never had an inclination to go across the bar to help or sort anything out. We had bouncers and rightly or wrongly I was not going to cross the bar, especially when most of the bar stewards were new and didn’t know the drill. The first time this would happen on a guy’s first shift they would automatically want to go and jump in. I had to stop them and lock everyone in the glass wash area to ensure that they couldn’t and that they were safe. I know this sounds harsh but we are talking about a pub that had an incident in it 6 months before I joined of gun fights.

However, riding in London I saw a bloke grab a girl’s push bike in the middle of an entrance of a roundabout and start to scream at her. I went around the roundabout and he was still doing it and had physically grabbed her to stop her moving, so I pulled up and walked over and asked if everything was ok. He answered but I wouldn’t move until she answered by which time he had let her go and she was able to be on her way. I´m no hero and only did this because I was in full leathers and never once took my lid off.

I guess I´m highlighting incidences here that put "help" into context. It´s natural to put your own survival in an equation of going to help someone after all we are animals as well. That´s what makes it so impressive when others do step into help where their own safety isn´t guaranteed.:smt023

[Baph]

Saying that, in my last bar job there really wasn't a Thursday or Friday night that at least once during the night I wouldn't have to hit the "police panic" button. :plod:


I remember those buttons well. In one of the pubs I worked in it was agreed 3 squaks of the radio means the police come running.

In a later pub, the button was only ever used once whilst I was there. Accidentally. The talking to the cleaner got from an armed response officer ensured it never happened again. :lol:

[flymo]

In a later pub, the button was only ever used once whilst I was there. Accidentally. The talking to the cleaner got from an armed response officer ensured it never happened again. :lol:

Oh my god, this reminds me of a little incident I was involved in as a kid :-)

My dad was (still is) a watch repairer and at the time used to collect/repair/return watches and clocks from all the local jewellers.

So, one day I'm out with my dad while he does his rounds, think I was about 6 at the time. I got left in the back room of a jewellers while my dad was chatting to the owner in the shop. I thought it would be a great idea to make everybody a cup of tea, filled the kettle and was pushing on the red button on the wall to make it boil :-)

5 mins later a shop full of police turned up with guns all wanting a cuppa I guess........my dad went ape**** when he realised what happened.

#END DERAIL

[missyburd]

Entirely depends on the situation. I have spoken sternly to bullying kids before, having been in the same situation myself I now utterly despise anything of the sort. As for a fight I know I'm not of the capacity to do anything much in the way of defence, but I'd certainly alert someone to the situation, call the police or whatever, just make sure it was being taken care of.

The whole business about "not wanting to get involved" is understandable but at the end of the day I wouldn't want anything on my conscience, knowing that I could have done something but deliberately didn't would play on my mind for a long time.

[Miss Alpinestarhero]

I wouldn't expect everyone to get involved in breaking up fisticuffs or preventing robberies, but there are plenty of scenarios those people could get involved in: helping at traffic accidents, people collapsing in the street, lost children, etc. from the sounds of it you would help at those and that is very admirable.

Of course - If it was a member of my family in that situation, or even myself, Id want someone to help. "Treat others the way you would like to be treated" concept.

My mum collapsed in a busy shopping center once and im so grateful to those who stepped in, called an ambulance and read her medic-alert tag and gave her glucose.

A little act of kindness/help goes a very long way.

[Biker Biggles]

Working at the pub. Bloke and his wife had been arguing in the bar for ages, we told them it was getting out time and that they had to leave. I checked with her she was okay, she smiled and lightly replied 'yeah'. Anyway, been nosey we could still hear them arguing outside, I stepped outside mainly to see if she was okay, she was in the car he was by the window and he was in the window shouting at her face. Next thing, he stepped slightly back and landed her one right in the chops. I was over there like a shot, she was bleeding and crying her eyes out trying to start the car, our manageress was not far behind and she had seen the lot, she got the lady out the car and saw to her, meanwhile I have confronted the bloke and pushed him away asking him WTF he thought he was doing...his reply "none of your business", 'fair reply mate, but why the **** do you think its right to hit her?', "I don't need to answer to you fatboy" with that he has tried to push me back and then swing for me. I landed him one on the chops and shouted how the **** do youlike it...and then as soon as that happened, security from the hotel over the road grabbed holt of me. The bloke came back for more but was restrained by two others from the pub.

On the return to the pub after all had calmed down, people were saying well done etc, the manageress however said "well done, but you do realise, this will be investigated". I was told to take holiday whilst the investigation was done, and was issued with a disciplinary hearing with the AM. There was footage of it from the car park but it was without sound, and it was unclear the bloke was shouting...Therefore I was issued with a written warning.

Looking back on it, I didn't know the full situation, only basics of what I sort....Was it stupid? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably not the way i dealt with it that time, however, put it like this - I will never stand by and let that sort of thing happen.

NEVER HIT A WOMAN.

Nowadays, I will always step in and try to stop violence whatever the background, whether the person deserves it or not.

Bloke I know has recently been sacked from his job and lost his entire career in similar circumstances.I believe the Daily Mail may do a story on it tomorrow(rumour has it).
Bottom line is there is no official support for have a go heros and the system is heavily stacked against them.Hence fewer and fewer people are willing to get involved.

[gruntygiggles]

Hmmm, didn't see the programme, but I know from experience that I am not capable of just walking by or ignoring something.

I was a Night Manager in a City Centre hotel when I was younger and would have to work a night shift on my own, no security with a Duty Manager (always less experienced and less confident than me) sleeping upstairs. We used to accommodate football fans of teams playing in Cardiff and all the hen and stag weekends and I cannot tell you how many times fights broke out in the bar. I decided early on that the only way to stay safe was to stay behind the bar and be make it absolutely clear in the most polite way that I would take no sh*t off anyone. We didn't have a police panic button or anything and thankfully, I only had to call for the police once, but usually, when a fight broke out, hitting the botton that released the cast iron safety door on the old safe would be enough to stop everyone. That thing came down and it sounded like a bomb going off. No-one would ignore it. Everyone would go deadly quite wondering what the hell had just happened and I'd use my sternest but calmest voice and just say, "anyone still in this bar in 2 minutes is going to have to spend the night in a police cell or on the street because if you don't calm down and go to bed I'm going to have the police come here and throw you out"

Occasionally there would be a smart ar$e that would say I wasn't strong enough to throw them out so I'd just say I wouldn't touch them for fear of catching something and would let the police do it for me. Always worked a treat and most people became apologetic and were embarrassed the next morning.

The only other really nasty thing I've witnessed was a extremely brutal beating by 6 lads on a young father who was with his wife and disabled baby. The lads had been calling the baby names, the father totally ignored them and tried to walk around them, standing between them and his wife and baby. I wa at the cash machine behind a big brick pillar and was watching them. One of them decided to lash out and then the rest set upon him like animals.....it was one of the worst things I have ever seen. I had already started to get my mobile out when a woman the other end of the street shouted and one of the lads ran to her and I think would have hit her if she hadn't got into her car in time as he kicked the door as she drove off. I stayed behind the pillar, called 999 and as the local police station was only about 300 yards around the corner, help arrived literally within a minute. It must have been only a 3 minute attack and the victim was hospitalised for a very long time. I am glad I stayed quiet and chose to call the police as it would have been stupid of me to try and stop a fight like that when I would have no way of overpowering even one of the lads, let alone 6.

If I can help, I will and I will never just stand by, but I think you have to put your own safety first. If I had ended up beaten up by those lads, who would have called the police???