Your favourite quotes?

[Magnum]

One of mine would be

"Perfection is a road, not a destination. Every time I live, I get an education." - Burk Hudson

I remember seeing the first part in Viney's sig, and really liked it.

[Sally]

I have no problems with sobriety, in moderation. (My Sig).

Billy Connely:

McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you if you don't
insert the 'Mc' before the item you are ordering..... It has to be a
McChicken Burger, just a Chicken Burger gets blank looks. Well I'll have
a McStraw and jam it in your McEyes you ****ing McTosser

[Bibio]

Golf is a good walk, ruined...

[Magnum]

Oh one more before i hit the hay.

'Frankly my dear, i don't give a damn.' - Gone with the wind (1939)

[Venom]

See sig...

[Venom]

And also this

"Earth provides enough to satisfy every man's need, but not every man's greed" - Gandhi

[Lozzo]

"Never trust the word of a man who wore flip-flops and a bedsheet" - Laurie Birkett, 25/7/2009

[davepreston]

better to be tried by 10 than carried by 6 (words to live by)
if at first you dont succeed, reload (funny)
he's not the messhia he's a very naughty boy (lob v funny)
god has to be irish he's got the same sick sence of humour (my dad)
i have become death destroyer off worlds ( said on first test of A bomb)

[davepreston]

oh and the most usefull i use
officer i used what force i deemed nessesary to stop them being a future threat to myself (used more regularly than i should)

[Mr Speirs]

One I use on my girlfriend who is well into fashion.

Fashion is the only thing humans find so detestable they feel the need to change it every 6 months.

[muffles]

Can't remember where I heard this, an advert or something I think, but I don't think it's famous. However I love it cos it summarises me quite well (I'm impatient) :lol:

"Patience is being bored and doing nothing about it"

[Jinxy43]

"You're not drunk, if you can lay on the floor with out holding on"

Or

"I'd hate to be a teetotaler. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's as good as you're going to feel all day.”

[Samurai Penguin]

I'll throw in a few of my favourites;

"What started as a legitimate effort by the townspeople of Salem to identify, capture and kill those who did Satan's bidding quickly deteriorated into a witch hunt." - Army Man

''I do not want your admiration now, because I do not want your insults in the future. I bear with my loneliness now in order to avoid greater loneliness in the years ahead. You see, loneliness is the price we have to pay for being born in this modern age, so full of freedom, independence, and our own egotistical selves''. - Kokoro by Natsume Soseki

"By a free country, I mean a country where people are allowed, As long as they do not hurt their neighbours, To do as they like. I do not mean a country where six men may make five men do exactly as they like." - Lord Salisbury (1830 - 1903)

"They might have the strength to impose their will, but we will never give them our consent".

"You are in Zapatista rebel territory. Here the people give the orders and the government obeys."

[Paul the 6th]

"You can't blame a compass for pointing north" - Yorkie Chris

"only 5 days till the weekend" - use this one every single monday

when something starts to go wrong = "it's not cricket, is it?"

"this is not the gheyest thread in the world, this is just a tribute" - milky bar kid

"i'm disappointed we didn't get a lunge photo while the bike was still under the car" - Yorkie Chris

"I washed my c*ck especially for this weekend" - Badger on the hardy bikers rideout 2

"allow me to reach into my handbag of hits and play you another bangin' choon' baby.. ooh, what's this I see, oh look it's brian adams again"

etc

[Wideboy]

"what you want, a fecking medal?"

[dawn07]

" I used to be indecisive.....now, I'm not so sure"
" I think, therefore I am.....I'm pink, therefore I'm spam!"

[Jayneflakes]

I saw a great film staring Robert DeNiro a while back, where he played an ex-cop stroke survivor. Part of the story was that he had to learn to speak again so was advised to see his neighbour for singing lessons from her, despite their mutual dislike for each other. Here is the trailer (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C8ZAr9yeqwM).

During one of their arguments she yells at him the following.

"I was more man than you will ever be and more woman than you will ever get!"

That had me in stitches and it was nice to see a Transgendered heroine for a change as opposed to the usual murder victims, social misfits or hookers you usually see represented in the media. :cool:

[Sid Squid]

"Rules are for the obedience of fools, and the guidance of wise men." (I've unquestionably quoted that approximately at best, but the message comes across I think).
Hard to find out with certainty who that should be attributed to.

"However beautiful the strategy, one should occasionally look at the results."
Winston Churchill

"Don't crash."
Sid Squid

[Rorshach]

hmmmm... my sig , was said in parliment by sir Winstion Churchill.

lions led by donkeys...used to discribe the troops and officers in WWI.

its not who we are that matters , its what we do that defines us.

and to quote a mate from ctc. we are now standing on the toes of midgets.

[Milky Bar Kid]

"this is not the gheyest thread in the world, this is just a tribute" - milky bar kid

I did not say "gheyest"! I said greatest.

[davepreston]

well arent you my f***ing hero
my mate yoda to a yank marine after he came running up screaming to his mate he went over the boarder into iraq, we'd been there for 4 months

[Sally]

well arent you my f***ing hero
my mate yoda to a yank marine after he came running up screaming to his mate he went over the boarder into iraq, we'd been there for 4 months

Was that part of a story from Friday night GMII?
I think I remember you telling me that one.. :rolleyes:

[Holdup]

"With you i run in certain and walk out confused!" (or along those lines any way) - Gene Hunt, Life On Mars :D

[embee]

Just too many to choose from. A fragrant nosegay..........

Sex - one of the 9 reasons for reincarnation. The other 8 are unimportant.
Henry Miller

Work - the refuge of those who have nothing better to do.
Oscar Wilde

Xenophobia - the resentment of the fact that most people in the world are foreigners
Anon

Cabbage - A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.
Ambrose Bierce

Democracy - the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard
H.L.Mencken

[carnivore]

'I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.'
Hunter S Thompson. :smt028

I read about the evils of drink, so stopped reading.

[Ruffy]

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around, you could miss it!" - Ferris Bueller. Do you feel guilty abput taking a day off just for yourself?

"Live simply so that others may simply live" - Anon. Posted above the door of every science lab at my school. I never fully understood why but it always intriged me and has stuck with me since as not a bad approach to life.

[Mr Speirs]

I'd rather sit in the middle of no mans land, smoking endless cigarettes with a luminous balaclava on, then have my tongue stapled to the floor with a croquette hoop.

Blackadder

[Von Teese]

Time is a great healer but a lousy beautician


An eye for an eye leaves both people blind



God give me Patience......AND HURRY!

[Holdup]

A lion eat a bull untill the bull was all gone, the lion then roared and roared as loud as he good untill he was shot down by a hunter, the moral of the story? when your full of bull, keep your mouth shut - Unknown

[Bri w]

"Every day is a nice day. But some are nicer than others." Anon.

"A mistake is a sign i was working." Anon

"For those of you watching in black and white, the pink is behind the brown." David Coleman

[Jinxy43]

I forgot this one

"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist."

[xXBADGERXx]

"F*ck off , and when you`ve F*cked off , F*ck off some more" Can`t remember when I said it or to whom , but I wasn`t very happy with their presence in my company .

"My eyes are as Red as the Devil`s Scrotum" Paul the 6th , Hardy Bikers Rideout II

"There is no such thing as bad Weather , only bad Clothing" Billy Connolly

[Richie]

a few army quotes.

A Plan is only a plan until you get incoming fire.

10.25, 10.26 COME ON, 10.28, COME ON, COME ON. 10.30 Fail....!

Drop and give me infinaty !

Don't get a sad on, get a mag on and Stag on.

The Balls in your court now.

Army V RAF = Dig in, not check in.

It's not training if it's not raining.

At the end of the day the sun goes down.

poo happens

Get a life.

Get a Grip.

Are we nearly there yet?

In coming rounds have right of way. FACT

Check your 5 & 20's

Cameling Cameling Cameling stops... jump off, hump off, Look inside. On inspection you find "No water", refill camel, Hump on, jump on, Carry on cameling.

Never trust a grunt.

Early knock off lads, POETS day tomorrow. (Pee Of Earlie Tomorrows Saturday)

A moaning wingeing squaddie is only truly happy if he's moaning or wingeing. FACT

[sv-robo]

It's like oral sex.....one slip of the tongue & your in the sh*t!!

[Swin]

Most anything by Oscar Wilde, Groucho Marx or WC Fields :)

Particular favourite (as I don't like cut flowers much) by Wilde:

I like flowers, I also like children, but I don't feel the need to cut children's heads off and store them in vases in my rooms

[xXBADGERXx]

I like flowers, I also like children, but I don't feel the need to cut children's heads off and store them in vases in my rooms

I do .

[yorkie_chris]

Alcohol free beer, it's like licking your sisters kitten. Tastes the same, but it's just not right.

A plan never survives first contact with the enemy/reality.

We keep designing things to be idiot proof, and they keep designing better idiots.

[Lou M]

'These are the days that must happen to you' used by Dan Walsh, taken from Walt Whitman, I'm a big Walt fan.

Also, see signature.

[Paul the 6th]

I did not say "gheyest"! I said greatest.


sorry for mis-quoting you mkb :( (it does sound better though :))