View Full Version : HELP - funny suggestions please...
gruntygiggles
13-08-10, 05:07 PM
Or serious ones.
Last night, watching the meteor shower, we were confronted with the noise of people dogging along the next lane up from the house. Rather annoying, don't care if they go somewhere no-one lives, but we live here and I don't really like it. I don't like the condoms being found on the National Trust common land and I especially didn't like, in fact felt a bit sick, when we heard a baby in the car.
Depraved is the word that fits I think. What I am going to do is speak to the local police community officer and the National Trust as I really don't want this outside my bleedin front door.
What are your other suggestions though??? C'mon, be creative!
Quiff Wichard
13-08-10, 05:08 PM
sorry .. I will try and find somewhere else to do it..
my apologies xxxx
Bedhead
13-08-10, 05:11 PM
A flash from a camera is always good!
A few bangers let off can put an end to most carnal activities or one of thos flashy LED bike lights with some blue film over it to look like a police light will have them pulling their kecks up!
gruntygiggles
13-08-10, 05:11 PM
Please do.....thank you!
;-)
Tell them to try this ...
http://forums.sv650.org/showthread.php?t=155904
instead!
Or join in :D
whats the name of your road?:-dd
Borrow a horsebox and park in the car park. When a car drives in, flash your lights. When somebody approaches the car tell them to get in the horsebox and enjoy themselves.
gruntygiggles
13-08-10, 05:18 PM
A flash from a camera is always good!
A few bangers let off can put an end to most carnal activities or one of thos flashy LED bike lights with some blue film over it to look like a police light will have them pulling their kecks up!
Oh there were plenty of camera flashes....into the car!
yorkie_chris
13-08-10, 05:19 PM
Air rifle and a night sight
set up a Sound stage with wolf noises, and fishing line tied to a few random tree branches... Worked well on a school trip, scared the living crap out of two of the teachers :0)
http://forums.sv650.org/showthread.php?p=2343167#post2343167
girth seems to know a bit about it
gruntygiggles
13-08-10, 05:21 PM
Richie, I think if that was going to work having a big black lab x rottie running at you howling and barking should work too and it doesn't. One couple ran into their car a few weeks back, but the reat just ignore.
Seriously though, this was 1am and they were doing this in a car ........ WITH A BABY IN IT!
Sick!
that is wrong, i'd complain to the council and the police, and poss the national trust as its their land, one of them will end up doing somethin about it
Simply drive a big 4x4 over their car :0)
Kilted Ginger
13-08-10, 05:28 PM
Go down, not alone. Big Camera big Flash, make sure to get their registrations and faces. Lewd and indecent behaviour is the charge i think, plod may not have the manpower to chase them away but must act if presented with evidence, alternatively youtube is your friend.
or sneak round the cars whilst they are busy and let all their tyres down.
Littlepeahead
13-08-10, 06:22 PM
A loudhailer and a large spotlight. Tell them you will be publishing photos and reg numbers in the local paper the following week.
We went out looking for the meteor shower last night in a local field and when I was lying on my picnic rug with a pillow under a blanket I did wonder what any passers by might think if they were not aware what an amazing show was going on in the skies last night.
MisterTommyH
13-08-10, 06:45 PM
Can you get a recording of a police siren and some good speakers?
Applaud when they finish?
Blue flashing lights and a siren, job done!
A mate at work has a ex French or Italian police bike from the early nineties with full working sirens and lights, now that would move them!
does the posh B&B owner know?
Wideboy
13-08-10, 09:01 PM
does the posh B&B owner know?
she's in on it!!
i say send gary round.... the place would be full of tumbleweed then
Stick a sign up stating, Hidden Cameras / if you have come here for sex please sign the release form on your way out as we would like to say who is starring in the adult movie
Dicky Ticker
14-08-10, 08:21 AM
1,000,000 candle power hand held torch or bangers tossed under the car.
Big box of carpet nails strategically sprinkled where they park---not by you obviously;)
wyrdness
14-08-10, 08:35 AM
There's a baby involved? I'd have been straight on to the police. Mention suspected paedophiles and they'd have been straight round.
Drew Carey
14-08-10, 09:06 AM
Thats sick about the child being there. +1 for calling the cops.
Raise it at the next neighbourhood watch meet. Doing something legit has a better chance of long term results........
However...........:D Now I put my mischevious head on.....
1. Find some army surplus, get about 10 of you. Hide camo'd up in the bushes around with fake guns and then attack!!!!.
2. Hide some microphones in the bushes etc. Then just play really loud kiddies music as soon as they go at it.
Again on a serious note, I have known the National Trust previously to chain off bad layby's etc with the help of local helpers etc. If people are then caught on camera removing the signs etc they can be prosecuted. I know people go there for sunsets etc. But can be chained after that each night.
timwilky
14-08-10, 09:58 AM
Family friend got fed up of people parking on his road (about a mile long dirt track) for a bit, that one day he wrenched open the door and threw in a full opened can of bright yellow emulsion.
Explain how that happened to your wife/husband when you get back home.
Bedhead
14-08-10, 10:12 AM
Family friend got fed up of people parking on his road (about a mile long dirt track) for a bit, that one day he wrenched open the door and threw in a full opened can of bright yellow emulsion.
Explain how that happened to your wife/husband when you get back home.
Hammerite would have been better! :D:D:D
What you can do is buy and old £50 banger off gumtree, park it across the entance to the car park and set fire to it, then sit back and watch the trapped shaggers having to deal with the cops and fire brigade!.
I'll admit I'm no stranger to the back seat of a car with a girl, but I wouldn't want someone looking in at us.
As for the baby ----- SICK!!!:smt013:smt013:smt013
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=He82NBjJqf8
that is totally sick!!!
+1 on calling the police about suspected pedos.
invest in a paintball gun, so much fun could be had
gruntygiggles
14-08-10, 10:48 AM
Yep, there was no-one there last night, so no point calling the police unless they can come and catch them in the act.
I'm not going to do anything myself like shining torches as I don;t want to spook them. I want the police to be able to have maximum impact.
metalmonkey
14-08-10, 11:27 AM
My suggestion would be to make a note of the time they are, what day ect and maybe the number plate of the car as well and pass it over to the police. If they are not aware they I would hope some interest to be shown.
Whilst jumping out of a bush with a fake gun maybe funny, not everyone may find it funny. I'm sure you can understand why.
Well if you happen to be walking the dogs at night they do bark ect...just be creative!
As for the kid in the car that is very messed up, those people need a talking too at the very least...
metalangel
14-08-10, 11:32 AM
They were probably telling the baby in 2 minutes you're gonna have a new brother/sister...
gruntygiggles
14-08-10, 11:39 AM
MetalMonkey - as you'll have seen in my original post, I know what I am going to do, the funny stuff is just to vent in a good way.
No point taking down number plates and passing to the police. Keep a log yes, but the police need to come here when it is happening in order to actually do something.
Yes, they could take the numberplate and as MBK just said (being a cop herself she knows what she's talking about) all they can do is keep a look out for the car or visit the registered keepers address and have a word. The problems I have with that are a) I would have to shine light on the cars/people in order to get registrations, see them clearly enough to identify and there is no way I am putting myself in that position and no cop would advise me to and;
b) I would rather, given that they are doing this with a baby in the car, that the police attend when it is in progress, make arrests and ensure that the future welfare of that baby is at the very least investigated and monitored.
I'm liking the funny replies, not going to use any of them, but keep them coming as they make me feel not quite so sickened by it!
TheOnlyNemesis
14-08-10, 02:13 PM
buy a scream costume and grab a kitchen knife and have fun
edit: for the license plate thing, instead of shining a light to see it, i can lend you my night vision goggles if you want XD
gruntygiggles
14-08-10, 05:05 PM
buy a scream costume and grab a kitchen knife and have fun
edit: for the license plate thing, instead of shining a light to see it, i can lend you my night vision goggles if you want XD
That could actually work...but only if they were binoculars as well as I don't want to go walking up there.
Just called the non emergency line as one of the dogs bought a condom into the house. NOT HAPPY!
They are going to send unmarked cars to check and asked me to let them know when it's happening.
TheOnlyNemesis
14-08-10, 05:13 PM
they do has a zoom on them as well
gruntygiggles
14-08-10, 05:18 PM
Cool, I'll deffo borrow them then Stu. Might get Dan to get the reg's though as I don't really want to see what they are up to.
TheOnlyNemesis
14-08-10, 05:19 PM
with WB down, he can do it, he'd enjoy it
gruntygiggles
14-08-10, 05:23 PM
with WB down, he can do it, he'd enjoy it
Oh no he wouldn't......he's cringing just as much as me...it's gross!
dizzyblonde
14-08-10, 05:40 PM
If they are doing it in the car, why can't you just climb onto the car and bounce up and down on it?
I would, roof surfing anyone?
Anyway, how do you know these people don't have anywhere else to do it? They may live with the olds and have no privacy and think they aren't harming anyone. Taking baby in car for ride as cover? No different to parents having nookie in their bedroom when babbs is new born. Jus thinking out of the box.
Not that its any excuse mind!
metalhead19
14-08-10, 05:55 PM
You could attach a rope to their car and then drag it across the field with ur land rover
Jayneflakes
14-08-10, 11:05 PM
You could provide a litter bin and recycle the condoms, just wash them out under a tap!
See it as an opportunity, you could sell a lot of Ice cream, cool beers or Butt plugs to the folks just there to watch. Don't forget, drinks at such venues can be three or four times the price of those in the pub.
Hope that helps!
Dress up as a white mime artist and peer in the car
Dress up as a white mime artist and peer in the car
I'd definitely be put off my stroke if I looked up to see three or four Ronald McDonalds or other clowns looking into the car. I doubt I'd go back there either.
xXBADGERXx
15-08-10, 12:03 AM
What you need is some volunteers , Water Balloons , a Funnel , A big pot of Chilli , Laxatives , Gloves and a Catapult . Eat the Chilli and laxatives , bum chug into the funnel and fill the balloons , put the gloves on and load the catapult .......... take aim .......... oh oh oh oh and some sick individual to come and film it as well , I like Chilli :)
Video it, then post it on the internet... and Make some cash !!
or take down the Reg of the car spend a few quid on a DVLA search and push the video to his/her parents :0)
(or ask a friendly cop to do an illegal car reg search?)
Or... Drive you 4x4 behind then and wack your Full Beam on... Whilst taking your dogs for a walk :0) <--- Thats what I'd do. :0)
BanannaMan
15-08-10, 05:08 AM
Have 4 or 5 people in ski masks carrying appropriate objects such as metal pipe, suitable pieces of wood, pry bars or other such objects decend on said car and do some custom bodywork on it before disapearing back into the woods. They won't be back...or anyone else they know. LOL
If only it had been last week....:rambo:
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