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View Full Version : The end is nigh ..........


xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 12:41 AM
Dear friends ..... It is my solemn duty to report that the most terrible of events has occurred . After a night of debauchery in North Wales it is with great regret that I report to you that Dave Preston is BROKEN . He has had a malfunction of the sorriest order and has spent New Years eve on my sofa squinting like a Japanese Sniper and living on Paracetamol and ................... shock Horror , a glass of Water . He has Gemma checking his pulse every 15 minutes and his life insurance policy and licking her lips at the prospect of never having to pay the mortgage again . Like all great men he went out with some poetic words ..... "God damn you Badger"

Milky Bar Kid
01-01-11, 12:48 AM
Well done Badger! You broked him!!

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 12:57 AM
He is now classing water as a Soft Drink ....... I said he will be drinking glasses of Cotton Wool next

Milky Bar Kid
01-01-11, 12:59 AM
Is he just really drunk? Surely he should be sober enough nwo for another drink! Normally if I get that drunk early I'm fine again in a few hours!!

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 01:02 AM
No Milky .... I killed him last night , he is still dead , he went to bed at quarter to 8 this morning , every so wobbly and woke up at 3 this afternoon and has had 3 naps that I know of , he has not touched a drop of anything harder than Welsh tap Water , Honest .

Milky Bar Kid
01-01-11, 01:04 AM
Give him beer. He will be fine!

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 01:06 AM
I walked past him with Port earlier and he nearly fainted

Milky Bar Kid
01-01-11, 01:11 AM
What a big fanny he is!!

Shellywoozle
01-01-11, 01:13 AM
What a big fanny he is!!

How did you get fanny past the swear filter .... or is it turned off for 2011 :p

Milky Bar Kid
01-01-11, 01:13 AM
Fanny has always been available!! Probably because I'm like the only person who ever calls anyone in the world a fanny or a fud!

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 01:21 AM
To be fair we did drink a bottle of Schnapps , then went to the pub and had 5 or 6 pints , then back home to polish off half a bottle of JD and a some of Gemmas Beer .... the carpet was a minefield of glasses and empty cans . He`s still bitching about me throwing Oranges at his nut bag

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 02:38 AM
Normal service has been resumed , DavePreston has grudginglt demanded a can of Ale and is now being very Bohemian by munching Cheese and Crackers with Grapes

Milky Bar Kid
01-01-11, 02:39 AM
Told you a can of beer would sort him!

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 02:40 AM
He has a Pooh eating grin on his face now

Milky Bar Kid
01-01-11, 02:41 AM
Tell him I say he's a fanny for lying sleeping all tht time when he could have been drinking!!

toxic
01-01-11, 04:20 AM
Fanny has always been available!! Probably because I'm like the only person who ever calls anyone in the world a fanny or a fud!

amazing we have summat in common... is this some karmic-chi love thing happening here or what?

Bluefish
01-01-11, 10:54 AM
and how is he this new years morn? :smt039

-Ralph-
01-01-11, 11:10 AM
If he would stop drinking that Irish paint stripper spelled "Whiskey" then he'd be able to hold his drink a bit better. It has damaged his stomach, and now he doesn't have one. He need's to drink Scotch for a while and give it a chance to grow back.

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 09:04 PM
and how is he this new years morn? :smt039

He arose quite chipper but still broken from the drinking from Friday night , just waved Bye-Bye to them after spending a day having a nice Dinner in Wethers in front of a crackling Fire then finished the evening off with a few Beers in Conwy and then to the cinema to see Tron Legacy ..... I look forward to doing it all again next time they are down for a visit :)

andrewsmith
01-01-11, 10:20 PM
If he would stop drinking that Irish paint stripper spelled "Whiskey" then he'd be able to hold his drink a bit better. It has damaged his stomach, and now he doesn't have one. He need's to drink Scotch for a while and give it a chance to grow back.

I don't know how anyone does drink that stuff!!

Badger, that sounded like a heavy one but not that heavy. was the schnapps 200 proof?

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 10:23 PM
I don't know how anyone does drink that stuff!!

Badger, that sounded like a heavy one but not that heavy. was the schnapps 200 proof?

I dunno there was a litre of the stuff and probably more Beer than we care to admit , it all got a bit blurry when we got back as Dave put the Kinect on and we ended up drinking and laughing ourselves sick

andrewsmith
01-01-11, 10:32 PM
I give you your due, drinking an Irishman under the table.

Tried doing it to my mate 'on the pull' and he's won and I've been rough for a day

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 10:33 PM
I wouldn`t say I drank him under the table , I just fared better than him over the next 2 days lol

andrewsmith
01-01-11, 10:38 PM
:lol:

a lot by sounds

xXBADGERXx
01-01-11, 10:42 PM
I did spend a lot of time secretly sniggering to myself , you`d swear I had driven him off a cliff by the way he was moving lol

andrewsmith
01-01-11, 10:44 PM
I can imagine.
No doubt Dave could drink me under a table (not hard anymore)

Sally
02-01-11, 01:53 AM
Somethings wrong, why doesnt he get back on it :( :drunken:

Ed
02-01-11, 01:53 PM
Now, a Sally-v-Preston match, that would be worth watching:lol:

andrewsmith
02-01-11, 03:28 PM
now, a sally-v-preston match, that would be worth watching:lol:

+1

ar11?

davepreston
04-01-11, 06:54 AM
Now, a Sally-v-Preston match, that would be worth watching:lol:
done GmII, and he was owned
badger is a very bad man, i just now have got the ability to type again after the shakes have supsided

i here by hand over all drink related shenanigans to my right honourable friend badger

may he cause the pain and anguish in others that he caused to me

and NO i dont feel bad for doing it to you (the org) all those times before

AndyBrad
04-01-11, 07:23 AM
good lad badger :) i was wondering if i should have run a book on it :)

andrewsmith
04-01-11, 08:07 AM
good lad badger :) i was wondering if i should have run a book on it :)

haha!

I would have been out of pocket :stupid:


Dave, Sally; rematch?