View Full Version : City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
PsychoCannon
08-02-11, 03:21 PM
OK so I'm getting almost daily tickets from a numpty of a warden who thinks it's ok to issue tickets on private property.
we get them every so often and appeal, usually with no problems and any that do drag on dissapear before court anyway.
Basically I'm parking on company property off the road but the public (who have NO RIGHT OF WAY) pass through as a short cut, this includes traffic wardens who for the most part know not to ticket bikes here.
I've had another ticket, appealed it, and another...and another...all from the same warden.
seems some monkey thinks he's found a jackpot and is visiting every day so I now have a nice pile of totally un-enforcable £120 tickets and I'm so sick of having to take time out to appeal these every single time that I want to make use of the orgs devious minds.
How do I make the most fun and amusment for myself with these tickets and waste these idiots time and money the way they keep wasting mine by forcing me to defend myself from them?
punyXpress
08-02-11, 03:31 PM
Did you / can you claim loss of earnings?
PsychoCannon
08-02-11, 03:44 PM
Not for them sticking some glorified stickers to my bike no :)
Mental anguish maybe lol ^_^
Was thinking more along the lines of anything I can do to tie the buggers up and make them work before I send them the photos of the bike and big bronze plaque mentioning that this is in fact private property with no right of way for the public and telling them to kindly go forth and multiply with themselves...again...
Biker Biggles
08-02-11, 03:45 PM
Make a formal complaint (in writing)to the issuing authority.The complaint should be along the lines of its OK to make a mistake and issue a ticket once or twice,but when it is established that you commit no offence any further tickets amount to harrassment and you are looking for compensation.At the same time ask for a copy of their complaints policy to make sure they stick to the timelines in it.
Water Bucket.
Next time he comes round, soak him. Your not actually abusing him, jsut making them wet.
Then remind him that he's trespassing on private property, and if he steps on it again, he'll get another bucket load. With ice this time.
Now thats a good one......
Then throw water? Double buzz?
PsychoCannon
08-02-11, 03:57 PM
Hehe we could take this to a whole new level of psychological torture couldn't we?
Charge the bike but increase the charge slightly each day so it starts at static slowly getting to OW you bugger!
Then we start with the puddles of water and "suddenly breaking water pipes" + charged bike.
Give the guy a phobia of touching bikes for life!
send them a ticket for entering private property without the owners permission.
send them a ticket for entering private property without the owners permission.
+1
where abouts on your bike do they stick these tickets?
PsychoCannon
08-02-11, 09:17 PM
Sometimes the screen, sometimes the rear seat, had it wrapped around my bars once which really annoyed me for some reason 0_O
fizzwheel
08-02-11, 09:23 PM
Is the area clearly marked as "Private Property"
If so can you not wait for the phantom ticketer to turn up, perform a citizens arrest for trespass and then phone the police ?
I know nothing about the legality of any of this, but it'd sure p*ss me off if somebody did that to me.
Is it the same warden each time ?
Know what time he comes round?
Hide in a bush, jump out and scare the sh!t out of him?
Hide under youre bike cover and jump out when you hear him...
Emmm I shall have a think!!
yorkie_chris
08-02-11, 09:38 PM
Follow the c*ck home and clone his plate so he sends himself a ticket.
dizzyblonde
08-02-11, 09:45 PM
follow him home, and stick all the tickets hes given you, on his vehicle, see how he likes that!
keith_d
08-02-11, 09:56 PM
Start photocopying tickets for a week or two so you've got details of the number of tickets issued.
Then, when he passes buy ask for his identification. When he asks why, explain that you are going to complain to his manager about harassment. When he claims he's only doing his job, point out that he's on private property and not entitled to ticket your bike there. So what he's doing is harassment!
If he doesn't back down at this point it's time for a formal complaint. That's in writing with copies to:
a) His boss.
b) The numpty responsible for parking enforcement in the borough
c) The head of the council
d) Whoever is specified in the official complaints procedure
Be sure to include details of the location including photos, details of the tickets and the name of the warden(s) in question.
Edit - you might also want to set up CCTV monitoring your bike (with your bosses permission) so that if he vandalises your bike after his disciplinary hearing you can approach the council for compensation (and probably cost him his job). Vindictive but effective.
MisterTommyH
08-02-11, 10:10 PM
Sounds like harassment to me. Try a restraining order against the CEO - he's obviously got some grudge against you and shouldn't be allowed within 50 feet of you or your bike.
speedplay
08-02-11, 10:18 PM
have a look on the tickets and see if the time of issue is more or less the same each day.
would be worth having a word with the police saying that some knob is messing with your bike daily at xxxxx time.
yorkie_chris
08-02-11, 10:36 PM
And some weird adhesive near the primary brake controls, attempted murder if you ask me!
Follow the c*ck home and clone his plate so he sends himself a ticket.
Haha that is the best idea I have ever heard, this is definitely a must!!
If it's in London he is most probably a Nigerian immigrant, they used to ticket and clamp me all the time in Nottinghill, I'm so glad I don't work in London anymore...
andrewsmith
08-02-11, 10:49 PM
as has been siad, check the issuing times and if the same time everyday its harassment.
Check the private property signs and see you boss about stopping up the access used as a shortcut (as presumed right in law will become your enemy circa 20 year and its presumed right of way).
Camera the area as I've had this with a guy who got me a ticket (where presumed right was now happening as it had the parking in that location was evidencable for 30 years) and he was told where to go and had his car clamped (someone else did this after he peeved off the wrong person).
Racist.
Bollox. It is NOT racist.
Bollox. It is NOT racist.
I know :) Sorreh was just taking his comment out of context on purpose.
DarrenSV650S
09-02-11, 12:43 AM
Put a cover over your bike.
andrewsmith
09-02-11, 06:43 AM
I know :) Sorreh was just taking his comment out of context on purpose.
Dont turn into matt-jokes
right, if the guy has stuck it on your rear seat, claim that the glue used on the ticket has affected the material and caused a visual damage to the seat and also caused your brake lever to stick sometimes, usually after you have removed the ticket from the handle-bars, and your screen is now scratched due to the wardens PERSISTANT ILLEGAL ticketing.
tactcom7
09-02-11, 08:57 AM
Stand there with a handy cam and just film him doing it, make sure you are polite and don't swear then send the evidence to his boss.
454697819
09-02-11, 09:17 AM
Stand there with a handy cam and just film him doing it, make sure you are polite and don't swear then send the evidence to his boss.
the winner,
send it with a polite but firm letter stating x y & z and that this is your final correspondence and as such any further issued tickets will not be appealed and no court appearances will be made.
here's hoping.
you could always just taser him and hide the body in an industrial unit, flee to brazil or mexico and live in luxury........for a week or two =P
Water Bucket.
Next time he comes round, soak him. Your not actually abusing him, jsut making them wet.
Then remind him that he's trespassing on private property, and if he steps on it again, he'll get another bucket load. With ice this time.Thats assault im affraid.
in fairness, just whack a cheap cover on your bike, they cant touch the cover, so you wont be annoyed with tickets, and your bike wont be attacked by small grit/gravel when the wind picks up like it has been lately.
PsychoCannon
09-02-11, 09:48 AM
Some good ideas ;)
And I have always wanted to visit Mexico :)))
I was under the impression the rules/law had changed and wardens could now remove/move covers etc in order to check plates etc as long as due care was applied?
The Soho lot (been a while since I went :() should know :)
Hmm, you need to get hold of a traffic Warden uniform, or something that looks very similar. Get a mate dressed up in it, go mad with the fake blood and then bundle your mate into the boot of a car whilst the real warden is around to see it :D
PsychoCannon
09-02-11, 11:40 AM
LOLLLLL!
I love it.
Then calmly turn to the guy, dust off your jacket and say, "sorry mate can you come back in *check watch* 20 minutes?, thanks!"
SoulKiss
09-02-11, 11:42 AM
LOLLLLL!
I love it.
Then calmly turn to the guy, dust off your jacket and say, "sorry mate can you come back in *check watch* 20 minutes?, thanks!"
Want to borrow the MAC11 back?
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