AR rubbish excuses thread

[davepreston]

right if i have to drag my a5re down to what is practical france and be surronded by them babysham drinking towie brained lot, why the feck arent you

i see some notable names missing from that list to which im not happy about
electro, speedplay ffs even scoobs aint on there

so i insist on a proper complete reason on your non attendance or suitable recompence shall be dealt


tim wilky will be getting a personal interogation in the next few days

and i warn you these best be good

begin

[Cymraeg_Atodeg]

Dodged a bullet here... XD

[andrewsmith]

I'm travelling to what is the equivalent of Southern Spain from here!

Preston more or less London to me

[robh539]

SP will be washing his hair that day ;)

[flymo]

mmmmm, tempted. Can you take motorbikes on the train? :-)

[Specialone]

I can't be bothered and I don't like anybody, that's it.

Oh and I'm probably doing the ww1 sites in northern France / Belgium that weekend.

[SuzukiNess]

ridiculous fuel prices and a very thirsty bike :(

[andrewsmith]

ridiculous fuel prices and a very thirsty bike :(

Ness

I'd think of a better one!

[robh539]

I dont ride futher than a ball the ball of string allows. I dont know anyone , its far away. take ya pick lol

[timwilky]

Mother is not well, it is her birthday that weekend. I get the feeling it may well be her last.

[SuzukiNess]

Ness

I'd think of a better one!

:(

best i got.. :smt019

i'm washing my hair?? annual bath? :)

maybe i'll end up doing what i did last year and change my mind the day before and end up going... :rolleyes:

[Wideboy]

i'll be on the isle of man, sorry but there's no competition ;)

[Fruity-ya-ya]

It's too close to the wife's due date.

I can't fit a newborn in the top box.
Well I can fit one in but there'd be no room for beer.

[robh539]

i'll be on the isle of man, sorry but there's no competition ;)
thought you werent going? :(

[andrewsmith]

i'll be on the isle of man, sorry but there's no competition ;)

Good one!
I'm also over on that fair isle in July so need to be a bit Yorkshire'ish for a month

[maviczap]

i'll be on the isle of man, sorry but there's no competition ;)

What's the point of going there, if there's no competition ;)

[maviczap]

thought you werent going? :(

Special VIP invitation for the Baron :p

[Wideboy]

thought you werent going? :( i was a bit gutted and nearly crying as work got in the way, so now popping over as foot passenger, not going for the week and not taking the bikes. but at least i can still go

i thought you were out because of you hip? sorry im out of touch and busy, i dont keep in contact with anyone anymore lol

Good one!
I'm also over on that fair isle in July so need to be a bit Yorkshire'ish for a month

What's the point of going there, if there's no competition ;)
well i was going to send a postcard but now i'm not sure ;)

[xXBADGERXx]

Metallica are playing in a field in Donnington and are doing the "Black" Album in it`s entirety ..... along with a few more bands .

[Lozzo]

Metallica are playing in a field in Donnington and are doing the "Black" Album in it`s entirety ..... along with a few more bands .

Jesus Christ, that's the best reason I've seen so far... for being in Essex instead

[missyburd]

Found out you were going Dave so thought better of it :smt040

[Cymraeg_Atodeg]

Jesus Christ, that's the best reason I've seen so far... for being in Essex instead

I would have to disagree :smt064

[Owenski]

Too much going on in or around that time that the chances of me having that weekend free are pretty much zero... but I said that last year and still made it.

[Sir Trev]

What's an AR?








:joker:

[speedplay]

i see some notable names missing from that list to which im not happy about
electro, speedplay ffs even scoobs aint on there


I'm note able?!
And when was the last AR I went to...?

SP will be washing his hair that day ;)

Probably ;)

Actually...

I was thinking of coming down.
Going to be bringing the bike on the trailer though as I can't be bothered to load all the luggage on the bike.

[timwilky]

why am I to get a "personal interrogation"?

Does this mean dark hood and stress position. Or knowing Dave something more personal and stressful like opening my brandy bottle and watching him pour coke with it.

[robh539]

In to minds to be honest. If I do will be in the car.

[Quiff Wichard]

been there before..

cant get gravy or mushy peas.

[timwilky]

been there before..

cant get gravy or mushy peas.


How about a babbies yed? No point going if there is no real food

[Luckypants]

I have two excuses, I'll be on a ferry to France to go cycling in the Alps and if that hadn't been the only weekend all my bike buddies could do, then I would be attending a wedding. Essex comes a poor third this time. :)

[Supervox]

been there before..

cant get gravy or mushy peas.


I get both in my local chippie :-)

[monkey]

I'm hanging round with a bunch of sweaty, unwashed men in a field.

Ha, tricked you! You thought that meant I'll be in Essex didn't you?

If I wasn't going to Download I wouldn't be there anyway. Last year I met a horrendous lanky Irish fella whom I really didn't like and am keen to avoid. I think it was swigging from his bottle that gave me hepatitis :( and scabies :( and rabies :( and babies :(.

[Littlepeahead]

I am going to plant an anthrax bomb at Download and then the bands will be forced to relocate to Essex thus solving the music problem.

Can't believe that Keith Flint, from Essex, and a keen rider of motorbicycles is instead going to download too. I know he's headlining, but that's no excuse.

[NTECUK]

You lot are so going to miss LPH party pice.
And no pic's are allowed out.

[-Ralph-]

Don't need an excuse, if I just don't fancy going I won't go. I'll decide nearer the time.

[andrewsmith]

I am going to plant an anthrax bomb at Download and then the bands will be forced to relocate to Essex thus solving the music problem.

Can't believe that Keith Flint, from Essex, and a keen rider of motorbicycles is instead going to download too. I know he's headlining, but that's no excuse.

Anthrax eh...

http://youtu.be/zlLn0UicWrM

zlLn0UicWrM





They're playing download also ;)

[missyburd]

been there before..

cant get gravy or mushy peas.
And their faces when you ask for a butty! :rolleyes::p

[andrewsmith]

and batter :smt040

[orose]

and batter :smt040

If you're telling me I can't get a deep-fried battered pickled egg on demand, then the whole county is a write-off

[tinpants]

Sadly, this years AR clashes with the family holiday. Bugger.



That is all.

[xXBADGERXx]

Sadly, this years AR clashes with the family holiday. Bugger.



That is all.

If that`s what you do on Family Holidays , I`d hate to see what you would do at the AR :smt040

[wyrdness]

I've got my Small Person that weekend, so won't be able to ride anywhere. The campsite is probably going to be too noisy for small kids. However, if the weather's good, then it's not too far to bring him down for a while to look at the bikes. What time is everybody expected back at the site after the ride on Saturday?

[NTECUK]

It might be worth e mailing
ar2012essex@gmail.com
Also LPH added this if you want a propper bed
http://www.crouchvalley.com/BOC/service.asp?ccd=crouch_valley_hotel

[Littlepeahead]

I've got my Small Person that weekend, so won't be able to ride anywhere. The campsite is probably going to be too noisy for small kids. However, if the weather's good, then it's not too far to bring him down for a while to look at the bikes. What time is everybody expected back at the site after the ride on Saturday?

Hi Ian, I'll ask Supervox about timings but he's bringing his small ones, and Saaed may also bring his little girl so no reason why you can't join in. If you can't make it in the evening then there is always the lunch stop - my sister is goig to come for a picnic with her two boys of the wether is nice - which it will be as there isn't going to be ANY rain. If you want to camp then no reason why you can't set up in the other field with the less noisy normal campers - well away from Dave Preston.

[timwilky]

Although I cannot be there I will smile safe in the knowledge that Dave will be taking his own megaphone this year just in case he needs help finding his tent at 3 in the morning again.

[NTECUK]

There is quite allot of things for the younger ones to do do they don't get board around the close area.https://www.maldon.gov.uk/info/1049/event_hosting_permissions/20/parks_and_open_spaces/2
The military museum is good for older kids too.
And the resivors full ish at
http://www.essexwt.org.uk/eventsactivities/abberton_reservoir_visitor_centre_events/

[Littlepeahead]

Although I cannot be there I will smile safe in the knowledge that Dave will be taking his own megaphone this year just in case he needs help finding his tent at 3 in the morning again.

I could borrow a megaphone from work. But I'm not going to. Instead I'm thinking about a gag and straitjacket.

[pookie]

blimey you have a gag and straitjacket at work..i'm impressed with the cricket training :)

[-Ralph-]

blimey you have a gag and straitjacket at work..i'm impressed with the cricket training :)

No, she didn't say she would borrow them from work, just that she was considering using them instead of a megaphone borrowed from work.

She keeps the gag and the straight jacket in her cellar. ;)

[Milky Bar Kid]

I'm not going because there is a high chance I shall be running around the country in the back of a van somewhere with my helmet and a shield again this year!! A VERY high chance...

[paddy t]

afraid i ll be fully embracing my continuing mid life crisis , and doing my best dad ,nay,grandad dance to Saxon and Metallica in a muddy field , and pretending to know all the words !!!

[Paul the 6th]

F**k the world I am now DEFINITELY GOING TO BE THERE...

No excuses, no bad weather, not even a woman could stop me. I'll kick her in the shin if she tries it!

[Sid Squid]

At last a correct attitude is displayed - well done that man!

[rictus01]

I think the best (as in worst) I've heard so far are...

"I've tickets for the olympics this summer" I doubt they were competing.

and

"got to feed the goldfish"

Cheers Mark.

[Paul the 6th]

Sorry guys, plans have changed already; I'm nailing my c*ck to a burning building with a rusty nail that weekend I'm afraid.

[andrewsmith]

Sorry guys, plans have changed already; I'm nailing my c*ck to a burning building with a rusty nail that weekend I'm afraid.

Whilst wearing a Mankini?

[Paul the 6th]

nah just a slice of leerdammer like a tarzan patch ;) oh and gsx-r 750, a bearing shell spun round in it's seating... we reckon it could be down to slight oil starvation at some point which has caused a weakness which then failed massively while I was riding it.

Gonna get it fixed, sell it and buy a blade. Simples :) Hopefully in time for AR!

[andrewsmith]

nah just a slice of leerdammer like a tarzan patch ;)

http://i1034.photobucket.com/albums/a426/andrewsmith1708/e-needpics.gif

oh and gsx-r 750, a bearing shell spun round in it's seating... we reckon it could be down to slight oil starvation at some point which has caused a weakness which then failed massively while I was riding it.

Gonna get it fixed, sell it and buy a blade. Simples :) Hopefully in time for AR!

Owned by a wheelie merchant previously

[Paul the 6th]

aye... feck my life. My new car has developed a massive boost leak somewhere on the way home tonight, running rough as feck and smoking, and also sounds like a hand dryer in a public toilet when turbo is on full boost..

Someone hates me :D

[maviczap]

Owned by a wheelie merchant previously

Yep, +1

[andrewsmith]

aye... feck my life. My new car has developed a massive boost leak somewhere on the way home tonight, running rough as feck and smoking, and also sounds like a hand dryer in a public toilet when turbo is on full boost..

Someone hates me :D

Audi again?

[Paul the 6th]

noppers, ford mondeo this time :( outstanding car though, been running great, pulls really well, 550 miles to a tank of diesel (£65), super comfy with climate controlled ac, cruise control, auto lights & wipers, heated front & rear glass, sony 6 cd changer, reverse parking sensors, towbar & dual electrics... Just need to find the hose which has split and it'll be reet :)
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-vW39ZSZeK2w/T412n85N6hI/AAAAAAAAFm0/tl0QC59cb3s/s720/monty.JPG

[DJ123]

No excuses from me, i'm there!

[NTECUK]

I thought I'd post this in the right section for LPH.
Quote LPH
" Littlepeahead Member Mega Poster

Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Essex Posts: 1,241

Re: AR12 - Attendance list

I may now be out as might have to head to Birmingham to collect a trophy. But the good news is that Messie is BACK so all will be well. __________________ Follow the rainbow over the stream Follow the fellow who follows a dream

Today, 08:05 PM

[Littlepeahead]

Don't you start, the Wisden Trophy has been the bane of my bloody life this week. I managed to get a colleague to take it to Edgbaston on Wednesday so I don't have to miss the Slash gig but now we have to arrange to get it back and I'm the named person with the insurance underwriter. I'm trying to persuade them to allow the deputy editor of Wisden to take my place, but it's worth £20k so I don't know why they are trusting me with it anyway. I fell down the stairs while holding the offficial replica of the Ashes Urn!

I will be there on Friday night with cake whatever happens.

And I'm sure Dave Preston will squeeze into the bikini if I'm absent.

[NTECUK]

The cake will be fine .
Take the bikini with you . Its a family pub and we don't want people throwing them selves on the fire to escape DP mankini :shock:

[Messie]

Messie will only be there for the ride though.

[paddy t]

and here s me feeling guilty i m not going ,Messie and LPH not going !!!! atleast mines my 30th anniversary of going to Download ,and Metallica are playing the Black album , just for me on my 47th birthday :) ...you getting a bike sorted out for a couple of summer ride outs Messie ???

[Sid Squid]

The Black Album is by The Damned.

Apparently some wannabe losers called 'Metallica' titled their poor offering the same some years later, but it isn't the real thing.

[Littlepeahead]

Well I got a call last night, if the insurers agree to it, the lovely man from Wisden will collect the trophy for me. Top bloke.

[NTECUK]

Back at ya Paddy lol.
And Messie is attending the ride out.

[paddy t]

thats ok , as they didn t actually call it that anyway , i believe it just became known as that by American DJ s ,as the album is actually called "Metallica",but was just to save confusion.. as for "wannabe losers" don t really understand that,as i ve seen both Metallica and The Damned over the last 30 odd years (with and without Sensible ) and there s not a whole hog of difference on their ability to play to the crowd...

[Sid Squid]

Ability wise you're right, there's not a whole to choose, but Metallica are just one, (and not even the best), amongst a host of too similar to tell the difference 'metally' bands, whereas the Damned are the very definition of a section of musical history, with an imagination and latitude that is difficult to match.

But that's just what I think. And no-one ever listens to me anyway :D.

[Viney]

The Black Album is by The Damned.

Apparently some wannabe losers called 'Metallica' titled their poor offering the same some years later, but it isn't the real thing.Wrong. its by that J Zed fellow dont you know. There is also a Grey album which is the lyrics from the aforementioned Black Album by J Zed over the top of the White Album by those Scouse chaps from a few years back.

[hindle8907]

I had a baby and my bike is off the road. :(

[xXBADGERXx]

The Black Album is by The Damned.

Apparently some wannabe losers called 'Metallica' titled their poor offering the same some years later, but it isn't the real thing.

Incorrect , the album that is Black with the Snake on the cover is actually called "Metallica" ........ it was the public that called it the Black Album

[maviczap]

I had a baby :(

Now I don't think you did, did you ;)

[hindle8907]

Now I don't think you did, did you ;)

:smt019

[monkey]

Incorrect , the album that is Black with the Snake on the cover is actually called "Metallica" ........ it was the public that called it the Black Album

How come you're not going to Download?

[xXBADGERXx]

How come you're not going to Download?

Tell ya later

[Spank86]

Incorrect , the album that is Black with the Snake on the cover is actually called "Metallica" ........ it was the public that called it the Black Album
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_AiGg18hn8Tk/ShtYQuWHzMI/AAAAAAAAAOY/hXTmgpx3z5Q/s320/Prince-The-Black-Album-311961.jpg


Controversial? :p

[jambo]

Wrong. its by that J Zed fellow dont you know. There is also a Grey album which is the lyrics from the aforementioned Black Album by J Zed over the top of the White Album by those Scouse chaps from a few years back.

Are you all quite sure you're not thinking of "Smell the glove" by Spinal Tap?

Jambo

[xXBADGERXx]

Is that available in DOBLY ?

[NTECUK]

True Rock but only when its turned up to 11 and Dubbly

[xXBADGERXx]

Jeanine: "Everybody knows that you don't do Heavy Metal in Dobly."
Nigel: "In Dublin?"
David: "She means Dolby....."

[BernardBikerchick]

well mine is only half an excuse really as attending the sat night but just not the ride out hehehehe :) but hey haven't been on here much so thought I'd post !!! :p:p

i shall miss those that aren't going especially my fellow northerners :) x

[xXBADGERXx]

I was actually going to put in a surprise visit , but by car . Something came along that stopped me going to Download and the AR ... plus the weather is now epically sherhite so I don`t feel so gutted about the choice , hope it isn`t bad down there for you all this weekend though .

[widepants]

was hoping to go just to please Dave Preston and joked on Faceache that my shed had blown over in the storms . I got home from the misses this morning to find the shed roof felt in a tree .
FAIL

[monkey]

i shall miss those that aren't going especially my fellow northerners :) x

Thanks.

[BernardBikerchick]

Thanks.

and YOU of course D heheheh xxxxx

[Richie]

I'd had a hard on and didn't want to waste it, now wrist too sore to Ride =0)

[widepants]

grief how long did that one take?

[Richie]

had to change hands at 99.
999 times @ 120 bpm... you do the Math :0)

[BanannaMan]

There was a big ocean in the way.

[wyrdness]

I'd had a hard on and didn't want to waste it, now wrist too sore to Ride =0)

I guess that at your age you need to make the most of them, if and when they happen.

;)

[Littlepeahead]

I'm currently stuck on the slow train to Birmingham to collect the Wisden trophy from Edgbaston. Should have asked KP to chuck it in the back of his car, except there's not much boot room in a Ferarri.

Oh well, it's the price I pay for making it to AR.

[Scoobs]

Right. I've decided I'm going to go to this now. When is it? I don't want to turn up a month early, like I did last time.

[Littlepeahead]

It's in two weeks, and you have to turn up wearing sequinned Speedos and a glitter cowboy hat. Just follow the signs for the Harley meet, we'll be at the far end of the field.

[NTECUK]

Were just behind this lot
http://www.essexchapter.com/images/ChapterBBQGroup.jpg

[Scoobs]

I'll be there in...err...swimwear.