View Full Version : Facebook. How many friends? How did you choose them?
-Ralph-
09-10-12, 10:11 AM
Just interested in this.
Remember that threads in IB are like a book cover, if you don't like the look of it. you don't have to read or contribute to it. This thread isn't for Facebook bashing and comments about how it's a load of carp and the downfall of society.
I have 85 friends currently. Most of those are couples and families, where both partners and in some cases their children are on my Facebook friends list, so that immediately cuts the number in half. So I estimate I have about 50 households with access to my Facebook page, of which approximately
10 are family
20 are friends who I've known for a long time and trust even if I don't get to see all of them all that often
10 are .org forum members who I have met and socialised with on at least 3 or 4 occasions .org weekends away, SV Ecosse and Madlanders rideouts, etc. They are people I like, know they have a good heart, and are not are not likely to cause any problems for me in any way. If I've met a forum member once, on a rideout or .org weekend away, they won't be on my friend list.
5 the family members of good friends, whom I also know and have met and socialised with on more than one occasion
5 neighbours
My Facebook is (I think) totally locked down. If not on my friend list, or if logged out, you should see nothing but my profile picture and my name.
I use Facebook to share photo's, including those of my child or my wife on the beach in her bikini. I share news via status updates, which may sometimes be of a personal nature. For me it's a means of communication in a busy world where, there isn't always time (or willing, by the time I sit down at night I'm usually knackered), to phone or write to everyone personally. I don't want the world to see this stuff.
I have teenage cousins and removed rights for 'friends of friends' from my security settings, because they have 400 odd 'friends' on Facebook, so if they commented on something I'd posted, half their school, and presumably others in their households parents, brothers, sisters, etc were getting a peak too!
I realise everyone uses Facebook for different things, some see it the opposite to me, it's a public medium, their security settings are configured default, it's the internet and they wouldn't put on anything private.
So how do you use yours?
How many friends do you have on your Facebook page?
What is your criteria to decide if someone should be a Facebook 'friend'?
dizzyblonde
09-10-12, 10:22 AM
My profile is totally private, as far as I am aware, only friends can see things, unless I have allowed access for a specific photo or post.
I do every now and again remove friends, not because I dislike them, just that they serve no purpose. I never accept requests from friends kids, I am an adult and therefore sometimes content is not u rated!
I have never blocked somebody, but do occasionally limit audience....ie something I don't want my mum to see, amongst other people.
Peg has about 30 friends, he culled everyone at one point, no disrespect to anyone, but he has who he wants on there, even friends he has met and likes with respect aren't there, hey, he doesnt even have missyburd, and he sees her often!!
I can't understand these people who seem to add randoms, or folk they met once from the other side of the world and are not likely to meet again. Sometimes it does seem folk have millions of friends just to look popular....ego massage!
322 friends, might have to look and see how many I actually need there ;)
yorkie_chris
09-10-12, 10:37 AM
I can't understand these people who seem to add randoms, or folk they met once from the other side of the world and are not likely to meet again.
Surely it has a purpose there if you got on with someone and want to stay in touch?
More so than having people on there who you see regularly even.
Dunno how many friends, don't care, can't be bothered deleting people I don't put much personal info on anyway.
Specialone
09-10-12, 10:43 AM
Just looked, I have 78, quite a few are family or friends of family, there's quite a few off here as when I joined up FB, it had a suggested list so naively I just went along with it.
I hardly add anyone, not because I don't want to be FB friends with them, just can't be bothered.
Realistically, I could get mine down to about 60 with no bother.
Btw, I'm one of the Ralph's lucky ones.
40 odd, mostly family with some real life friends and that's about it, mostly use fb to share holiday snaps with friends
About 80. All are friends, people I've met and chatted to. Got most of the GM on there. I use it to upload photos, chat to people I don't see regular and to catch up on things.
Paul the 6th
09-10-12, 11:14 AM
I had a massive cull in April and got down to 35 or 38 friends... Back upto 150 nearly now. My rule is I don't add people, they can add me. Then I can decide whether I know the person well enough to class them as a friend when they send a request.
Also recently set up my options to let me approve photo & status tags as I have a few people I work with on there, then various people get upset when I delete their status updates because I don't think it's suitable for said work people. I honestly think it would be nice to go back to a pre-facebook world though.
davepreston
09-10-12, 11:32 AM
50 and i use it as a social tool
by social i mean arrange ****ups and abuse friends
security well 1/ i dont even use my real name 2/ non of my family are friends 3/ nothing of consiquence goes on
Jayneflakes
09-10-12, 11:33 AM
My Facebook is open to anyone because I use it as a way of promoting my writing, promoting my Blog and being in touch with people who listen to my radio show (when I am not banned for my constant swearing/flatulence/being mean on air). I tend to post jokes, fake status updates that are silly/rude/imply that I am mentally ill and just use it as a fun tool. I also post Human Rights campaigns, political cartoons or statements that I think promote comments and I enjoy seeing debate on my page. However, if something posted by some one else annoys me, or is too pointedly implying that I am something that I am not, I will delete it.
I am lucky enough to have Some Org friends on there too, but I know that given the content of my page, it is not for every one and I know that some people add me and then remove me due to this contect. I am not offended by this because the the Facebook thing is not a true representation of who I am, if anything it is another caricature, one of the many facets that make up my radio personality.
I had given thought to actually having a locked down personal one where do I do share my personal feelings and thoughts, but to be honest, I don't enjoy Facebook enough to do so. Were it not for the Radio station, I would have probably closed my FB account by now and spend the time reading, writing or torturing my owl with a cattle prod! ;-)
yorkie_chris
09-10-12, 11:34 AM
imply that I am mentally ill
Imply? :rolleyes:
MisterTommyH
09-10-12, 11:47 AM
176
Family, Extended Family, Friends, Extended social group, People I went to school with, People I know through other activities but not necessarily close friends with, People off the .org, people I've worked with (at my employer - business contacts are kept for LinkedIn only).
Basic criteria is that I know who you are and don't consider you to be a complete kn0b and can be bothered to add you - which probably means that I need to get rid of a few people. I could probably get rid of most people from school, because I don't have much to do with them, but I'm nosy.
I'm trying not to add new people as I need to have a cull as it is.
-Ralph-
09-10-12, 11:56 AM
My rule is I don't add people, they can add me.
Interesting approach actually, I like it.
TBH the only time I add anybody, is when I've become friends with somebody, seen them more and more often, and we are talking about something and what you're talking about would be easier if they'd been able to visualise a picture on Facebook, then I say to them 'Do you use Facebook?'. So it tends to be face to face agreement to add each other, which then happens later that evening.
I don't have anyone from work. Because I work from home I don't tend to make Friends at work, and to have a work person on Facebook, they really would have to be a friend who I trust 100% not to repeat things at work. Facebook and work, IMO, don't mix.
If I've met somebody once and they send me an FB request, and it's someone I liked and don't mind them having a little more insight into my life then I won't refuse it, it feels a bit rude to do so, but I'll accept, let them have a mooch around, then delete them from the list after a week or two. Lets be honest I'm not that interested in their facebook updates, they are not that interested in what my kid did at the weekend, so they don't need to be involved in ongoing updates and photo posts moving forwards.
-Ralph-
09-10-12, 11:58 AM
854...
2 are family..
So your FB page is as not really much different to a twitter feed. It's essentially public, and you have followers?
-Ralph-
09-10-12, 12:02 PM
Btw, I'm one of the Ralph's lucky ones.
Your household (you and Clair) would be included in the 20 friends households, not the 10 .org members.
Specialone
09-10-12, 12:10 PM
Your household (you and Clair) would be included in the 20 friends households, not the 10 .org members.
Oh I thought I was one of the special 10 :(
So your FB page is as not really much different to a twitter feed. It's essentially public, and you have followers?
Not public, still private to my 'friends'... Haha :rolleyes:
Facebooks different for my generation!
I have people I have met once on nights out
Football Team
School friends
Work friends
People I have met on holidays
People I have grew up with
Alot are bars, clubs, dj's, artists, etc etc
But theres no one there I wouldn't know how we met, when, etc etc
All in all, its basically for looking at the girls/women/quines holiday pictures ;) :smt103
Paul the 6th
09-10-12, 12:12 PM
Interesting approach actually, I like it.
And it's also good for when girls say "will you add me on facebook?" and you say "No, you'll add me."
Win:Win.
Spank86
09-10-12, 12:18 PM
ABout 150, and I've mostly followed Paul the 6ths rule of not adding others.
(Although If we all did that it might get lonely)
I've also refused lots of requests from people I used to know but no longer want to/people from school I long since lost tough with.
To be honest Its difficult to keep it down any lower, I seem to know a lot of people when I actually think about it and the ones on my friends list I dont contact frequently through facebook are almost all family or people I see often in real life.
EDIT: Paul appears to be on my friends list, One of us must be lying!
Also got around 1500 photos I am tagged in, not included pictures I have uploaded...
I 'like' ~ 900 pages, which also appear in my newsfeed, on top of the 854 friends I have...
My facebook is pretty busy, but I use it for everything (near enough) in my life.
Finding new music, finding out about club nights/quizzes/special offers, organising holidays/nights out/festivals, football training/games...
And facebook chat is good too, use it more than texting.
carelesschucca
09-10-12, 12:23 PM
Facebooks different for my generation!
He's calling you OLD Colin!!!
-Ralph-
09-10-12, 12:25 PM
If you have 850 'friends' and 'friends of friends' is also allowed in your settings, then your FB page is as good as public. You probably have a wider audience on FB than there are active members of this forum.
Yep, I'm OLD!
-Ralph-
09-10-12, 12:27 PM
Oh I thought I was one of the special 10 :(
Would you rather be considered a friend or just some bloke I know off a forum? LOL
He's calling you OLD Colin!!!
oldER :)
dizzyblonde
09-10-12, 12:38 PM
@yc, if you have 1500 friends on FB, and add someone abroad, you met briefly when attending a gig with another friend.....and you walk down a street .. would you know them from Adam?
I wouldn't.
Now I do have friends who gig with bands and they have loads of friends as per this scenario, as they use it as a media for promotion, but if you are Joe Bloggs, and add some random you spoke to for five minutes with a mate, personally I find it pointless, especiallyvif there's another 1500 friends in the same way on you list. But that's just me. I prefer to have real friends, not billy no friends, if that makes sense?
I do have one person from here I haven't met, but she's speshul. I have someone from abroad I hsvent met, via someone else, but they have been helping me with something abroad, and when I go over, I will be actively seeking to meet her.
Specialone
09-10-12, 12:39 PM
Fight ! Fight! Fight! Get im Col, defend us oldies :)
MisterTommyH
09-10-12, 01:41 PM
Interesting approach actually, I like it.
I don't have anyone from work. Because I work from home I don't tend to make Friends at work, and to have a work person on Facebook, they really would have to be a friend who I trust 100% not to repeat things at work. Facebook and work, IMO, don't mix.
Bloody hell - I have my direct boss on there as a point of principle.
It comes in useful for little comments like - "Can someone point me in the direction of a big wall because I need something new to start banging my head against" - I know that this very much depends on the atmosphere you work in, but I find this works very well for getting across my frustration etc. without having to moan directly. But then it's nothing that I wouldn't say to other people in the office within ear shot of all the bosses.
Paul the 6th
09-10-12, 01:59 PM
Just avoid posting things like "GTA 5 released today - pulled a sicky especially!"
carelesschucca
09-10-12, 02:08 PM
Bloody hell - I have my direct boss on there as a point of principle.
I've only once ranted about work on facebook. The issue wasn't sorted never will be but it was nice to let off steam... STILL BL00DY ANNOYS ME TOO!!!
RAGE BUILDING AGAIN RIGHT NOW TO BE HONEST!!! :smt067
IDIOTS!!!
-Ralph-
09-10-12, 02:55 PM
I once added someone from work to Facebook when they left the company, because I got on with them well, had travelled a lot with her which meant many evenings spent over dinner and in hotel bars, I wanted to stay in touch.
Perhaps a year later, I went for a job interview (for my current job) and of course all my family and friends wanted to know how I got on at each interview and when I got the job offer (it was life changing event for me and for them requiring a move from Scotland where most of my family live, to the Midlands), so my Facebook being private as mine is, was perfect for sharing that info.
What I didn't realise was the ex-colleague was still friends with a current colleague and was feeding that information back to her over coffee gossip under a promise (she assured me when she apologised) not to repeat it. The ex-colleague should have kept her gob shut, the current colleague wasn't honouring that promise, and unbeknownst to me the whole office knew how I was getting on with my interviews. My boss told me this when I handed in my notice letter.
Needless to say she has since been culled from Facebook.
There is a lot of wisdom behind the old saying 'Business and pleasure don't mix'
widepants
09-10-12, 03:36 PM
just been through mine and the only one on there I could do without is Dizzy .Will dump her after the passing of goods at the motorway service station for one of my bestest FB buddies
missyburd
09-10-12, 05:15 PM
Just looked, 471. You have to bear in mind how long people have been on facebook too. I've been on since I started uni, so that's folk I've met through my three years studying, various voluntary escapades, hobbies etc. Family (all on limited profile bar one). Close friends, friends I don't get to see often but who I love keeping in touch with etc.
Now I'll have to admit that probably at least half of that 471 are folk I've met through uni/have volunteered with who I've met and liked but am not close enough with to warrant them looking at my profile. So they're on a limited profile. Don't know if they know they are but they are because until I've met someone long enough to judge whether I can trust/like them or not then they ain't getting full access (ooo-er missis!)
I, like Jayne, use Facebook as a massive business tool. I get a large proportion of my business through it, people know what I do and are regularly updated with new work.
A lot of .orgers who I've only met the once or similar are also on limited profile, it's not a snub it's just 'cos I don't know ya that well.
Every now and then I do partake in facebook culls, particularly if I get bored of people posting crap/pics of cruelty/ranting/whinging/swearing. I'm undecided as to whether being on limited profile is just prolonging being culled outright...time will tell. If I'm in a ruthless mood who knows :smt082
Dave20046
09-10-12, 05:33 PM
120ish, as everyone else with a bit of common sense/grump has mentioned - people I've met more than a few times and get on with are on there, but on a limited profile, people I'd trust and consider friends on a 'normal profile' and a 'close friends list' with a handful on I've known for over a decade.
No family and no work, which is a shame in a way as I have some good colleagues that do question my 'no work' rule fairly often and I do trust them to an extent but mistakes can be made!
My profile should be hidden unless searched for via email address or linked via an existing friend.
Specialone
09-10-12, 05:39 PM
So that's why I never see any of your updates Dave, I'm on restricted list [-X
shonadoll
09-10-12, 05:54 PM
I find Facebook great, particularly useful for outing someone's appalling behaviour a couple of years back and finding out who your real friends are. Very interesting results, wasn't thanked by anyone for my honesty but don't regret it for a minute.
I use Facebook to stay in touch with family, friends, but never put anything on I'd mind my boss reading for instance. I have my settings private as possible. It's great for me as I have a lot of friends abroad, about fifty are from the USA- I have never met any of them in real life but been on a private Internet group with them for years now. Don't know how many friends I have just went and looked and it doesn't tell you anymore but last count iirc was about 250.
Sme can see all my posts, some are restricted. I don't have any deep dark secrets anyway, and only a couple of people who I know would want to upset or hurt me and I have their numbers well sorted, so no worries there.
dizzyblonde
09-10-12, 05:59 PM
just been through mine and the only one on there I could do without is Dizzy .Will dump her after the passing of goods at the motorway service station for one of my bestest FB buddies
It's ok, I'm used to being cast aside once I'm not useful :rolleyes:
Biker Biggles
09-10-12, 06:04 PM
I hate to think what they all say about me on FB but as Im not on it Ill never know.
don't have any friends. i'm nobby nae mates.
Dave20046
09-10-12, 06:31 PM
So that's why I never see any of your updates Dave, I'm on restricted list [-X
You're not seniór (read senior ;) ) nosey - I'm just not massively active on it.
dirtydog
09-10-12, 07:11 PM
Got 29 friends on my Facebook
11 of which are family
13 are .Org members who I have met on rideouts or the in the GM
Which leaves just 6 which are friends or friends of family if that makes sense?
I don't add people very often and never add randoms. Neither do I actually post much on there.
In fact the last person I added as a friend was a .Orger
missyburd
09-10-12, 07:26 PM
In fact the last person I added as a friend was a .Orger
Oooo.... the mystery! ;)
dirtydog
09-10-12, 07:33 PM
:-#:-#:-#:joker:Oooo.... the mystery! ;)
:-# Shhhhhh ;)
andrewsmith
09-10-12, 07:52 PM
My Facebook is open to anyone because I use it as a way of promoting my writing, promoting my Blog and being in touch with people who listen to my radio show (when I am not banned for my constant swearing/flatulence/being mean on air). I tend to post jokes, fake status updates that are silly/rude/imply that I am mentally ill and just use it as a fun tool. I also post Human Rights campaigns, political cartoons or statements that I think promote comments and I enjoy seeing debate on my page. However, if something posted by some one else annoys me, or is too pointedly implying that I am something that I am not, I will delete it.
Jayne
I do think your mentally ill at times, then howl in laughter and realise your not :smt082
For anyone that doesn't know what Jayne's like, listen to bikerrockradio (http://bikerrock.yolasite.com/) :D Now should I post a link to one of the songs that's been played on several occassions??
yorkie_chris
09-10-12, 08:21 PM
The only person who stands up to defend jayne's mental state is an unintelligible professional at missing the point who only speaks wookie. Says a lot really :smt082
Jayneflakes
09-10-12, 08:21 PM
Jayne
I do think your mentally ill at times, then howl in laughter and realise your not :smt082
For anyone that doesn't know what Jayne's like, listen to bikerrockradio (http://bikerrock.yolasite.com/) :D Now should I post a link to one of the songs that's been played on several occassions??
Awwwww, you say the nicest things! Sadly I do not have a show at the moment, due to slipping up on air again, so my slot was given to a new DJ. However, I do try and present a Guerrilla show every now and again! It is one of our regular blokes on air at the moment and he is far nicer/politer/better than I can ever hope to be. :rolleyes:
As for posting a link to that song, it will get you banned Sir, I know, I have played it on air several times! I will have to see what happens tonight at just after midnight...
Sings #"shut your ************ face uncle ****************"# !
andrewsmith
09-10-12, 08:46 PM
The only person who stands up to defend jayne's mental state is an unintelligible professional at missing the point who only speaks wookie. Says a lot really :smt082
Fancy a pint of Gammeldansk ;)
Awwwww, you say the nicest things! Sadly I do not have a show at the moment, due to slipping up on air again, so my slot was given to a new DJ. However, I do try and present a Guerrilla show every now and again! It is one of our regular blokes on air at the moment and he is far nicer/politer/better than I can ever hope to be. :rolleyes:
As for posting a link to that song, it will get you banned Sir, I know, I have played it on air several times! I will have to see what happens tonight at just after midnight...
Sings #"shut your ************ face uncle ****************"# !
F or C or a FFSC
you *** ramming **** ****** uncle *****************!!!!!
:lol:
Best ads are the ones from girls (usually;)) you meet out or something, bonus if they're from abroad or you met them on travels! You're then open to a whole new world of photos from people and places around the world you never would have imagined.
BanannaMan
10-10-12, 03:26 AM
I have 168 friends.
Family, people I went to school with, other business owners, and a few customers. Only a handful of my riding mates.
I just accept friendships so as not to adversely affect my business.
Needless to say, this is not the crowd I want to know the details of my personal life so I avoid facebook as much as possible.
I think it's funny the people that post every single thing they do on facebook.
Get a life, no one gives a ****.
-Ralph-
10-10-12, 06:43 AM
Banannaman makes a good point there. Some of my cousins are of course on my friend list, but I have them set not to show status updates on my wall, as they post several times a day with stuff like 'got stopped at every set of traffic lights this morning' - Yeah? Really? Thanks for that!
Sent from my Galaxy S3 using Tapatalk
The Idle Biker
10-10-12, 12:39 PM
I have about 90 odd.
I don't add people unless I've met them and liked them.
I never put work colleagues on as tbh, I act very professionally at work and I don't want colleagues or customers to know what I'm really like when I leave work.
I generally use Facebook to stay in touch with people I don't get to see too often. I think it's great for that purpose.
Typically I use Facebook to make people think that my life is more interesting than it actually is. ;-)
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