Why are they always moist?

[Littlepeahead]

Squibs that is. Why do we only ever hear about damp squibs. What about the dry ones?

(Not to be confused with damp squids. That's Ian on a Friday in Soho when he forgets his waterproofs.)

[Spank86]

because a dry one is just normal and capable of doing it's job properly.

Also you probably don't know many people in the field of explosives so don't have much cause to talk about actual squibs.

[Fallout]

This thread is silly.

There. Mr Sensible has spoken.

[Littlepeahead]

You don't know for sure I don't know much about explosives. I might be a bomb disposal amateur. Again, not often heard of as people only ever mention bomb disposal experts.

[Dicky Ticker]

Somebody did not tell Sid Squib to come in out of the rain;)

[Spank86]

You don't know for sure I don't know much about explosives. I might be a bomb disposal amateur. Again, not often heard of as people only ever mention bomb disposal experts.

well you asked why you don't hear about dry squibs so I extrapolated from that.

There are lots of bomb disposal amateurs in Afghanistan, they're also known as collateral damage.

[Runako]

Spank you made me laugh out loud again

[Mark_h]

AR2013 proposal - Amateur bomb disposal competition. Surely we have enough contacts between us to fabricate a selection of IEDs. Not to mention a few rigged bikes and tents. What could possibly go wrong ?

[Littlepeahead]

When I suggested a wrestling competition in an inflatable paddling pool full of jelly for last year's AR I got myself in to all sorts of trouble. So yes, why don't we do that this year.

I was given a briefing by the anti terrorist and bomb squad teams for our major match crisis meeting. I was most shocked to hear that most bombs:

1. Don't always have two wires in different colours and cutting the correct one switches it off and makes it safe.

2. Don't always have a red digital clock counting down.

3. Won't be made safe by some balled American bloke wearing a grubby white vest called John McClane turning up to save the day.

[robh539]

Some geeky teenager in pokey office somewhere in the US is in hyper mode about now, with automatic keyword search for the content in this thread. Haha

Enjoy camp xray for your summer holiday ;)

[Spank86]

I was given a briefing by the anti terrorist and bomb squad teams for our major match crisis meeting.
So whats the name of the guy they ask for on the tannoy to signal a bomb threat over there then?

[Jayneflakes]

Surely all bomb disposal experts start as amateurs and then build up to being experts over time. Mind you, it all seems a little unfair to send some poor untrained person out to a bomb.

Is learning to be a bomb disposal expert like learning Burger flipping in MacDonalds where you start by scraping the nasties off the grill as you then train really hard to be able to cook a ground up animal anus?

As for dry squibs, they never get a mention because a dry squib is a sign of success and every person who has worked really hard at being a successful failure would no longer be a successful failure, but would rather be a success, thus failing at failure. All of this would make people very unhappy, hence why we never mention a dry squib.

I hope that I have in some small way been of help, I am now off to water my squibs. :D

[Littlepeahead]

So whats the name of the guy they ask for on the tannoy to signal a bomb threat over there then?

If I told you I'd have to kill you. So they ask for Mr... to go to the Grand Stand or wherever the issue is.

At Spurs they used to test the PA at the start of every match, but the guy doing it used enunciate it such that is sounded like he was saying "One Two Three Four Test-icles" instead of Test Calls.

[Balky001]

If I told you I'd have to kill you. So they ask for Mr... to go to the Grand Stand or wherever the issue is.

At Spurs they used to test the PA at the start of every match, but the guy doing it used enunciate it such that is sounded like he was saying "One Two Three Four Test-icicles" instead of Test Calls.

Sounds like bllx... Now he was a dry squib

[Teejayexc]

If I told you I'd have to kill you. So they ask for Mr... to go to the Grand Stand or wherever the issue is.

At Spurs they used to test the PA at the start of every match, but the guy doing it used enunciate it such that is sounded like he was saying "One Two Three Four Test-icicles" instead of Test Calls.

What's a testicicicle:confused:

Has it gone numb?