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kjames
08-02-05, 07:21 PM
well, finally got around to telling the GF that i was going to do mt full test in march and buy a bike....
didnt go down to well... she cried and said amongst other things.. blah blah "unsafe, you'll kill yourself....blah blah, "selfish"..... "if she'd known i was going to be a biker she wouldnt be going out with" (charming as we due to get married in a few months time.

anyway, the compromise we sort of ended up with was me buying a bike with same size engine as my scooter :cry: so currently umming and agghhing about buying an Aprilia RS 125... anyone got any experience of the these? will it blow up after a week. i do about 200 - 250 miles a week

other than that, im single again and can get an SV.. any single girls out there? and then i can weigh up my options

finally do i just re-do my CBT, which runs out soon or go for full test (might as well do resticted).

bugger bugger bugger

karl

Carsick
08-02-05, 07:29 PM
If you want the honest opinion of somebody who had many arguments with their long term girlfriend over getting a big bike, then get the SV.
Explain to her indoors that she needs to trust you and to let you do what you enjoy.
I had the whole "If I knew you were going to be a biker" nonsense and didn't listen to that one, I just explained to her everything about what I was doing and why and told her all about how bigger bikes are different to smaller ones and so on.

So, if you actually read that, you'll now be thinking "What if she dumps me when I buy the bike" well, do you really want to marry somebody who won't let you ride? It's all well and good her being worried about you, but you sometimes have to do what you feel you want to do.


On the RS125, I haven't ridden or owned one, but I know of them by reputation, and I doubt it would last long doing that kind of mileage.

What about a compromise, get a restricted license and do 2 years on a restricted SV.

Rodger Wabbit
08-02-05, 07:32 PM
Hi, Sod that show her whos boss :shock: Does your GF know abouts bikes? If shes doesnt then why not shuv a nice 125 badge down the side then she will think its a 125 :lol:

I wont be held responsible oh if she found out :roll:

Big Bad Al
08-02-05, 07:32 PM
I personally think the SV is safer. Better brakes, bigger wheels. Play up the positive aspects and tell her you will be careful.

Good luck!

kjames
08-02-05, 07:35 PM
i tried all the bigger brakes, wider tyres... they're safer line.
all i got back was " they're dangerous, im not interested in facts and figures"

could be tempted with an Sv with a 125 badge... not sure if she'll fall for that though. what am i talking about, of course she will.... she's a girl :D

k

K
08-02-05, 07:49 PM
My fella isn't a biker, he jokingly considers bikes to be broken cars... two wheels are missing y'see! :roll:
He;s very understnading about the whole thing though, even with the prospect of me doing trackdays this year... it's a part of who I am and that is who he is with.

OK, so she may not really understnad bikes and will switch off when you start to explain that larger bikes are generally safer than smaller ones, better brakes etc, the power to get out of a situation someone else creates on a road... blah blah blah is what she's going to hear.
That and think you're just saying it to get your way.

I'd take the tack and have a heartfelt discussion about your life together, your personalities and the nature of your relationship rather than mentioning a bike at all.
If a bike is going to split you up - it's only because you can be split up.

You live your life with someone (if you're lucky), not for them.

Carsick
08-02-05, 07:59 PM
If a bike is going to split you up - it's only because you can be split up.

You live your life with someone (if you're lucky), not for them.
This is more or less what I was trying to say.

I once used a chicken burger as an example (don't ask) when I was having that discussion with the gf at the time. The chicken burger got squashed.

Big Bad Al
08-02-05, 08:07 PM
Tough one dude. I started riding at aged 35 and had to face my parents! Biking was always a taboo cos my uncle died on the back of one. Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. The fact that I bike everywhere now helps my folks cos I'm always running errands for them, picking up prescriptions and rushing round in an emergency because they are pretty much housebound. I also get home from work in 1/2 hour instead of 2 hours so the benefits are there. Hard decision, but if you don't go with your own decision you will always be thinkng about it... :roll: :?:

Kate
08-02-05, 08:09 PM
Seems sad that she is making you choose between something you really want and her. Its easy for us to tell you to get the bike, its entirely down to you.

On the other hand, what would happen if you just turned up on an SV?

I haven't actually told my parents that I might like bikes a little. I mentioned that I went to a bike show and that was enough for my Mum and Dad to hit the roof. This is despite the fact I left home ten years ago. If they really irritate me I might just turn on on the SV and watch their reactions :twisted: Might be worth getting the popcorn in for that one.

kjames
08-02-05, 08:13 PM
well my plan with the Rs would be to do another 2yrs proving im not an idiot and then onto a bigger bike... but i suppose its juts prolonging the inevitable..

so, either i face the music now or put it off for 2 yrs.

havent even got around to telling the parents yet.!!

my dad used to fall off his quite regularly....pins in his legs etc.... and theres a great family story of my mam trying to jump start his bike by towing it behind the car, she was still learning to drive, pulled away to quickly and pulled the bike from under him and then dragged it for half a mile before she checked her mirrors.... anyway, thats another story.

Carsick
08-02-05, 08:19 PM
As for people having accidents on bikes, people have accidents in cars all the bloody time.
Pretty much all of my family for the last few generations have had some dealings with bikes (either partners riding or riding themselves) and the worst I got was "Take it easy, that's a bloody powerful bike"

I still think that a restricted SV would be the best compromise, but then, I may be a little biassed.

nickj
08-02-05, 08:20 PM
I don't understand why it's ok to ride around on a 125 that's still capable of 80mph (or more if deristricted) but not on a bigger bike. There's still a lot of tw@s on the road no matter what you drive.

I used to ride a TZR125 so similar to the aprilla and i feel much safer on the SV. The SV feels much more balanced and planted on the road and doesn't get blown around anywhere near as much. Also the acceleration is there when i want to get away from some wally who's on his phone.

Explain to your gf that at the end of the day it's up to you how fast the SV goes as you don't have to have it on full throttle all the time.

And once you've convinced her on this.....it's time to start working on a new exhaust :lol:

K
08-02-05, 08:30 PM
I haven't actually told my parents that I might like bikes a little. I mentioned that I went to a bike show and that was enough for my Mum and Dad to hit the roof. This is despite the fact I left home ten years ago. If they really irritate me I might just turn on on the SV and watch their reactions :twisted: Might be worth getting the popcorn in for that one.

:lol:
I had a similar thing. Pulled a beaut of a wheelie up the road infront of the house when it all came to a head though. :twisted:
By accident! :oops:

Jabba
08-02-05, 08:37 PM
Hmmm..... difficult one.

I know what you mean though; Mrs Jabba was not too impressed with the idea and even now she worries about me (actually, she worries about everyone else and what they might do to me).

The one thing in my favour was that she knew I'd wanted to ride a bike since I was a nipper but my parents were dead against it. I waited until they were pushing up the daisies before doing it as this meant that there would be two less people that I cared about worrying about me.

Lots of good advice in the posts above, but only you know your g/f and how much she means to you. Tell you what, though - it sounds to me like she cares about you. Good thing too, I reckon.

Like many things, and especially if you're about to embark upon life together, it needs to be a compromise. No point telling her that big bikes are safer cause unless she's a biker she won't understand, and she won't believe any biker who tells her so, either.

How about telling her that you'll take some advanced training (Police/Bikesafe/IAM)? I get loads of support for this and its fun, too :wink:

One thing I do know, though - unless you reach a compromise one or other of you will be harbouring resentment and that's not healthy for a relationship.

Stig
08-02-05, 09:19 PM
Well, as most people know on this forum, I was pretty much on deaths door after my accident and for four agonising days my wife did not know if I was going to live or not. The first thing I said to her when I woke was "I am never going back on a bike again".

Bikes have been my life for the past 20 years. Although when I first met Jo I was without my bike. (I was working in the Shetland Isles when I met her). She had no idea that I was so involved in bikes. Due to financial reasons (amongst other things) I was with out a bike for the first two years that we were together. She wasn't overly impressed when I said I was going to get one, but get one I did.

She was OK with that until I had my first serious off (argument with a Volvo driver, who pulled out in front of me). Because it wasn't my fault, it was easy to persuade her that I would be OK and it would just make me a safer and more cautious rider. She accepted that and things were OK. Then it came to the BIG OFF.

Well, I am still on a bike and she is still here with me. She worries every time I leave the house and worries until I return. But she DOES know that I am a more careful rider (or should that just be a more nervous one). The point I am trying to make is that she loves me and knows how much of a passion my biking is. She has stuck with me, and puts up with the worry when I am out on the bike.

I'm sure that love will conquer all, and she will stick with you. Just don't give her an excuse to say those dreaded words that women like to say the most "I told you so".

Best of luck fella

Carsick
08-02-05, 09:22 PM
Just don't give her an excuse to say those dreaded words that women like to say the most "I told you so".
They do seem to love saying that so much. :wink:

Kate
08-02-05, 09:45 PM
Just don't give her an excuse to say those dreaded words that women like to say the most "I told you so".
They do seem to love saying that so much. :wink:
I've found guys say that a lot too.

jump
08-02-05, 09:56 PM
dude, dude, dude!!! :roll: once you have convinced her about getting the bike, youre only a quarter of the way there... Wait till you see how difficult it is convincing her that you need a nice new jacket, boots, and other goodies and just don't even ask how you explain the nice noisy exhaust and the tail tidy! She just won't get it! I tried the noisy exhaust makes you safer cos people can hear you thing, and well... was like trying to convince Pavarotti to take up yoga! But i did it anyway... :lol:

Stig
08-02-05, 10:14 PM
Just don't give her an excuse to say those dreaded words that women like to say the most "I told you so".
They do seem to love saying that so much. :wink:
I've found guys say that a lot too.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Warren
09-02-05, 02:37 AM
If you want the honest opinion of somebody who had many arguments with their long term girlfriend over getting a big bike, then get the SV.
Explain to her indoors that she needs to trust you and to let you do what you enjoy.
I had the whole "If I knew you were going to be a biker" nonsense and didn't listen to that one, I just explained to her everything about what I was doing and why and told her all about how bigger bikes are different to smaller ones and so on.

So, if you actually read that, you'll now be thinking "What if she dumps me when I buy the bike" well, do you really want to marry somebody who won't let you ride? It's all well and good her being worried about you, but you sometimes have to do what you feel you want to do.

huh ? the aprillia 125 is about as fast as the sv (sorry if i offend) but the SV has better tyres, handling and brakes and reliability to cope with it al.


i think you will be 10 times safer on an SV than an RS125 IMHO.


even my mother said that she felt safer on my CBR6 than my GS125


On the RS125, I haven't ridden or owned one, but I know of them by reputation, and I doubt it would last long doing that kind of mileage.

What about a compromise, get a restricted license and do 2 years on a restricted SV.

Scoobs
09-02-05, 08:02 AM
RS125 was my first bike, then I got the SV. Sure the SV is a bigger bike, but it is IMO safer cos you ain't wringing its neck all the time like you are on the RS. My Aprilia was derestricted and good for 100mph. Brought it from new and blew it up at 3000 miles. It was well cared for, serviced etc. and I always warmed it to 60 degreees before riding it. I was riding it 100 miles a day and in the summer it was no problem, but in the winter it would start ok, but the carb icing was so bad it would conk out after 20 miles or so.

My missus is dead against bikes. She won't even sit on it in the drive with the engine off, but she has come round to me having one. She does worry, but I just had to prove that I was sensible (don't know how I got away with that one).

The flip side is, do you want a bike bad enough to end your relationship with your missus????

HTH

Scoobs

Nickster78
09-02-05, 08:25 AM
My bf was less than thrilled at the idea of me getting a bike and my mother worries every time I go out on it, however they both seemed to accept that I was going to do it with or without their approval so they may as well take an interest, my bf will now even come out on the back sometimes!

(I think they were both secretly hoping I wouldn't pass my test)

Viney
09-02-05, 08:34 AM
Look, dump the bird, buy the bike. You can always get another bird!!!

:lol: :lol:

Seriously, if your other half loves you that much then in my eyes, keep her and forget about the bike. Love is better than machinery any day of the week.

Failing that, do your test and buy a gilera VX180 :twisted:

zx6man
09-02-05, 08:46 AM
I personally think the SV is safer. Better brakes, bigger wheels. Play up the positive aspects and tell her you will be careful.

Good luck!

The wifes RS 125 could easily outbrake the SV and go round corners better too, so safety aint an issue, they do have decent braking and suspension, the sv front brake is well budget. oh..it was derestricted too and did 115... :shock:

Steve H
09-02-05, 08:47 AM
Like Scoobs, my first bike was a deristricted RS125. Great fun, but not what you could use as everyday transport. I generally agree that the SV will be the safer bet (if there is such a thing) as it is easier to ride well. What about getting the SV restricted? Surely telling her that its power would be restricted to make it safer will help matters (Not that it really is a great factor :wink: )

zx6man
09-02-05, 08:53 AM
And the RS costs a fair bit to run,more than you think, as you HAVE to use top 2 stoke as well.....and its almost as big as the sv anyway.

Allseeing
09-02-05, 08:56 AM
I have to agree with what's has been said here already.

When I started out last year I chose to get on with things without telling parents etc. I knew they would not be over the moon about it so decide it was better to just turn up on a bike one day. Circumstances mean't I had to tell the olds' before the event, however although not thrilled about the idea they were withdrawn to the fact that I was going to do it regardless of their view. I have to admit that this situation was made considerably easier as I moved away from the parents some years ago.

I did find though that talking to them sensibly about the gear and the bike I was getting (emphasising the safety points) that they were much less resistent to the idea.

AS.

fizzwheel
09-02-05, 09:04 AM
well, finally got around to telling the GF that i was going to do mt full test in march and buy a bike....
didnt go down to well... she cried and said amongst other things.. blah blah "unsafe, you'll kill yourself....blah blah, "selfish"..... "if she'd known i was going to be a biker she wouldnt be going out with" (charming as we due to get married in a few months time.

anyway, the compromise we sort of ended up with was me buying a bike with same size engine as my scooter :cry: so currently umming and agghhing about buying an Aprilia RS 125... anyone got any experience of the these? will it blow up after a week. i do about 200 - 250 miles a week

other than that, im single again and can get an SV.. any single girls out there? and then i can weigh up my options

finally do i just re-do my CBT, which runs out soon or go for full test (might as well do resticted).

bugger bugger bugger

karl

My mum had a fit when I told her I wanted to get my bike license, even though my brother and dad both ride, did my CBT and had a 125 for a while, She got used to it, and when I got my bigger bike she didnt even bat an eyelid.

As for the RS125, my brother had one and probably the best 125 you can get, IMHO, make sure you look after it though, keep it services and dont run it on anything but fully synthetic two stroke oil such as castrol TTS, I knowi its more expensive but its worth it

My brothers would pull 90mph restricted anyway, when he de-restricted it it would do over 110mph, it wont blow up but its a two stroke so you'll need to keep on top of the maintenance, the amount of miles you are doing a four stroke is going to be easier to look after.

Do your full test and get it out of the way, then you'll be ready to change to a bigger bike

As for the girlfriend tricky situation, has she had a bad experience with an ex who was a biker in the past that has made her react this way. Or is just panicking.

Sorry if it was me I would talk to her again when she has calmed down a bit more and get the SV anyway

Junior
09-02-05, 09:06 AM
Look at it from her point of view. She is basicially scared sh*tless that she is gonna loose you. I wish my ex-wife loved me that much. She could give a rats ass if I lived or died (I know that cause she told me so...in those exact words) Anyway, I'd stick with a smaller bike for now, and keep discussing it with her ( in a non annoying manner) I am pretty sure she'll come around. If not, there are worse things in the world than riding a small bike.


disclaimer.

I tried to give advice as to what you should. What I would do is go ahead with my plans and tell her "I love you, but this is something I have to do. If you wanna leave me for it, that is you right I guess." It's that old proverb. If you love someone let em go. If they come back, they are yours. If not, F*ck em and find someone better.

fizzwheel
09-02-05, 09:10 AM
Oh and my brother did 15,000 miles on his and had to rebuild it 3 times

Once it seized and threw him off at 80mph... not really a bike for along distance commute and as Scoobs says, a frickin b'stard to ride in the winter

If she's that worried why not get the SV and restrict it to 33bhp

BillyC
09-02-05, 09:18 AM
A nice situation to find oneself in! :?

It is my opinion that you'll be considerably safer on an SV than on a scooter. Just because it's small and light, doesn't mean it's safer, and many on here, including myself, will argue the contrary.

If you went out and bought a Ferrari, would she moan and cry then? Just because it's a fast car, doesn't mean you're going to kill yourself.

At the end of the day, proper bikes are more visible, more audible, have better brakes, have better power delivery to get out of trouble. Ride it sensibly as I'm sure you would, and she has nothing to worry about.

Now try explaining that to her! 8)

Steve H
09-02-05, 09:18 AM
Whilst the RS is good, It will not do 110+mph Derestricted or otherwise.
Unless it is going over a cliff with a tailwind! :D

kjames
09-02-05, 09:20 AM
hi guys, some great advice there. tempted to print it all off and giving it to her to read... although would probably edit my original post to include a bit more sentiment. :)

i think shes pretty sold on the 125 route, the fact the engine is no bigger than mine at the moment, and my little white lie that it would be any quicker than my gilera runner.

but dont fancy being thrown off when it seizes.. maybe look at 125 supermoto style bike... aprilia do one, MX i think and a couple of others.. food for thought.

i might try one more go at persuading her... but will defo sit my full bike test... and then test the waters with a restricted SV.
thanks

karl

Nickster78
09-02-05, 09:21 AM
I guess you have got to take the approach that a restricted bike is better than no bike!!!

zx6man
09-02-05, 09:21 AM
Whilst the RS is good, It will not do 110+mph Derestricted or otherwise.
Unless it is going over a cliff with a tailwind! :D

The wifes RS did 115....was 117 on my clock and the same on a SP1...

Steve H
09-02-05, 09:24 AM
Whilst the RS is good, It will not do 110+mph Derestricted or otherwise.
Unless it is going over a cliff with a tailwind! :D

The wifes RS did 115....was 117 on my clock and the same on a SP1...

Yeah, and im a Dutchman! :wink:

zx6man
09-02-05, 09:27 AM
Whilst the RS is good, It will not do 110+mph Derestricted or otherwise.
Unless it is going over a cliff with a tailwind! :D

The wifes RS did 115....was 117 on my clock and the same on a SP1...

Yeah, and im a Dutchman! :wink:

It used to upset a cagiva mito rider , who was beaten by a woman, as his was full power and only managed 105...

fizzwheel
09-02-05, 09:29 AM
If yuo are worried about it seizing and being thrown off, don't buy a two stroke, they are all suspectable ( sp ) erh.. prone to it

zx6man
09-02-05, 09:31 AM
I agree....125 on a KR1S...and it seized on the M/Way....was very lucky I had the clutch covered...and yes steve..the KR1S could do 125.. :D

Steve H
09-02-05, 09:33 AM
Should have had the clocks calibrated. Next you will be saying the ZX6r will do 170. Ive had one of those too. My RS was full power, Full Jolly Moto race exhaust, set up by a two stroke specialist.......and there was not a hope in Hell of it seeing 115mph. Are you sure it was not an RS250? :wink: :wink:

Grinch
09-02-05, 09:33 AM
I agree....125 on a KR1S...and it seized on the M/Way....was very lucky I had the clutch covered...and yes steve..the KR1S could do 125.. :D

Theres a KR1S in the back of my garage.. and it once did 142. Now its in need of some love, might even be up for sale soon.

And its a 250cc not a 125 thats why the higher speed.

Mogs
09-02-05, 09:33 AM
Didn't we have a poll on a similar subject (Does your other half like bikes yes/no) some time ago. I can't remember the result.

My wife dislikes the bike, but accepts that it's part of who I am. I have to promise to be carefull every time I go out. Someone on here suggested that you put a photo of your nearest and dearest in the fairing. I've done this and it's gone a long way to calm her fears.

zx6man
09-02-05, 09:39 AM
Should have had the clocks calibrated. Next you will be saying the ZX6r will do 170. Ive had one of those too. My RS was full power, Full Jolly Moto race exhaust, set up by a two stroke specialist.......and there was not a hope in Hell of it seeing 115mph. Are you sure it was not an RS250? :wink: :wink:

Sorry no...the zx6r was dynoed and showed 163. The wife doesn't weigh owt as well. Just because yours couldn't do it, doesn't mean they can't. It had an arrow can, race reeds etc, showed 39 bhp once set up. It was done at Stan stevens...in 2001 I think.

zx6man
09-02-05, 09:41 AM
Steve had a slow RS....Steve had a slow RS....nah nah nah nah nah..

Sorry....well I thought it was funny....... :D

Steve H
09-02-05, 09:45 AM
Steve had a slow RS....Steve had a slow RS....nah nah nah nah nah..

Sorry....well I thought it was funny....... :D
By all accounts, you are right!....................and if thats the case, im selling the SV and buying another 125! :wink:

zx6man
09-02-05, 09:48 AM
Steve had a slow RS....Steve had a slow RS....nah nah nah nah nah..

Sorry....well I thought it was funny....... :D
By all accounts, you are right!....................and if thats the case, im selling the SV and buying another 125! :wink:

Well, the wife just emailed me and said if she still had it, she would have challenged you to a duel!!!...she has one of those...sv type thingies now though....

Steve H
09-02-05, 09:52 AM
What, those slow tractor like things?! What she needs is an Aprilia RS 125!
:lol: Oh, and anyway, im far above things like duels! ( knees knocking!) :wink:

Captain Nemo
09-02-05, 09:53 AM
my mum did the full tears and "dont come running to me when you break your legs" bit when she found out i was taking my test, but over time shes come around a bit, my missus is the same, but the more times i go out and come back safe the better she gets about it,

personally i think that your more likely to get into trouble on something like an rs125 than you are on a bigger bike, for one thing its as twitchy as hell where bigger bikes are more composed and the fact that they are bigger obviously holds its advantages as far as being seen,

f the worst happens and you get hit by a vehicle youll be just as damaged on a 125 as a hayabusa, a big bike only goes as fast as you tell it , if you dont crack the throttle it dont go, you have to have more self control on a bigger bike thats all,

on a small bike its harder to get away from danger areas at junctions and roundabouts, much safer to be able to squirt away on a bigger bike.

if your fiancees main argument is that shes frightened of you having the big one and leaving her on her own, or worse having to look after you 24/7 then get the bigger bike.

if she needs reasurance, then get as much good after test rider training as you can, and show her that you can ride responsibly, at least then she will know that its less likely that if you have an off that it will be your fault..

Iansv
09-02-05, 10:11 AM
my mum wasn't very happy when I first decided to get a bike, I got her to follow me in the car for a ride to show her I was safe...

she still worries as does my nan but they know I love riding and that I won't stop...

Do your own thing and don't listen to others, its your life

Ed
09-02-05, 10:31 AM
Long story how I got interested. I had a bad off last year, few broken bones but nowhere near as badly hurt as Simon. Naturally, Mrs was mega upset, I got the 'I told you so' and demands never to get on a bike again, but I could never agree. We've talked about it a lot, she realises that I won't be happy unless I have a bike, but she would only agree to me getting back on if I did more training, so I did, and if I bought a slower bike - hence the ER5. But I hated the ER, it was just awful, slow and heavy, brakes not very good either. It really is true that a slower bike ain't necessarily a good idea.

I recognise that it's hard for her, and she has moved a long long way to put up with me. So I'm anxious to repay that trust.

IMHO the key to it is (a) to talk openly and honestly. She will see it as a threat, don't dismiss her POV, leads me to (b) training - not just how to handle the bike, but do defensive riding so as to anticipate the jerks who are a fact of life on Britain's roads. And get more life insurance.

As Ian says in prev post - ultimately it's your life, you must do as you think fit. The worst thing for both of you is you being resentful and looking at every bike that goes by, thinking 'wish that was me'. That would do neither of you any good.

Warren
09-02-05, 10:56 AM
my mum did the full tears and "dont come running to me when you break your legs"

:lol:

weegaz22
09-02-05, 11:06 AM
buy an sv and pull all the 650 stickers off it...and hide the logbook and insurance details :D

jambo
09-02-05, 11:17 AM
I had a lot less to contend with than most on this one.
3/4 of my parents / step parents have ridden a bke at some point, and my mum used to give me lifts to school on the bike when I was a kid. :P

My girlfriend is not hugely impressed with bikes (and thinks all the cloathes are ugly :roll: ) but knows I love riding and I rode a bike when I met her so it's not an issue. She went on the back once but hated the exposed feeling even though We barely broke the speed limit.

Do what you think's best but I've had some scary moments on 125s and scooters where you need about another 4 mph but it's just not available. 400cc + is where I'm happy. I think you'll find the RS 125 a bit fast and fragile for day to day use. Try somethng like a Bros 400 as an alternative comprimise, looks innocent enough but a good bike in the right hands (Just ask joe "itching to go" or watch the Llandow video) :lol:

Ceri JC
09-02-05, 12:04 PM
Sadly a lot of people seem to be of the opinion that if you start biking, you will die/be crippled in a bike accident and that it's only a matter of time.

My gf had some tears when I had a low speed off (5-10mph), but it was sort of understandable as her cousin died in a bike accident.

My mother literally stopped speaking to me for a week, cancelled her planned trip to come visit me at my new place, etc. worst falling out I've ever had.

If you want to play some mindgames, I'd go along the route of, "I love you, please don't stop me doing what I want to do as I would resent you for it..."

On a more logical note, you could consider doing some advanced rider training after your test, downplay the SV's abilities. I reassured them by saying, "I wanted something sensible and safe, I was looking at second hand sportsbikes, but decided against it", refer to it as a "tourer" rather than "sports-tourer". Don't wear race style leathers. Point out it's not in your own interests to die from biking. I also said it was a "middleweight" bike- not too big and powerful, but big enough to be seen by car drivers. Get some leathers with high vis strips on them as part of the design, etc.

I think most people get some form of stress from their family about biking, aside from those who come from biking families. And even then, a mate of mine, whose father-in-law is a Hell's Angel, is getting stick off his wife, who likes bike herself, about learning to ride!

Ceri JC
09-02-05, 12:07 PM
buy an sv and pull all the 650 stickers off it...and hide the logbook and insurance details :D

And import some of the SV400 stickers for the Jap bikes ;-)

Philbo
09-02-05, 12:23 PM
Am I missing something here? You already ride a scooter, but she doesn't want you to get a bike.....

That'll be the female logic kicking in! Doesn't she realise your safer on a bigger bike? Appart from the fact you'll recieve more training in the process, you can accelerate out of danger, enjoy a bigger road presence etc.

What about promissing to join the IAM or take other advanced training?

Or you could lull her in to a false sense of security by getting a "small bike" like a RGV250! Slow in the low revs, but shifts some as you climb the revs! Excellent handling blah blah, but it's a two stroke and needs pistons rings changed every 10,000 miles...so not one for the high mileage crew.

Good luck anyway, I ground the resistance out of my G/F over a few months until I got a reluctant "OK".

Balky001
09-02-05, 12:37 PM
I haven't read all the thread so apologies if I repeat anything stated before but sounds like your girlfriend is either a control freak, irrational, or really is worried about you and probably feels she has already compromised when you got a scooter/RS125, and now you are wanting more.

If the relationship is sound then maybe you just need to let her conquer her fears with some sensible rational and calm talk, rather than water tight arguements that she turns off on.

My wife wasn't happy that I started to ride, when I started doing track days she thought there's no way she can stop me and safer on the track than road - she did check to ensure my life policy covered these events though! Nice. Although she was worried about me biking, she wasn't worried when I went to a faster bike as its up to the rider how quick they go, you can still kill yourself on a 50cc and way more dangerous as cars try to overtake you.

Talk to the gf, and if you still feel you are reasonable getting a bigger bike (and can afford it etc - if that's also what she's worried about) then, as Obi-Wan Kenobi once said, 'it is your destiny'.

timwilky
09-02-05, 12:38 PM
My parents were adamant anti bikers. When my twin brother got a bike at 17 he was evicted.

At age 43 I was led in a bed in the local cardiac ward and he came to visit. "Cut the stresss" he said. "get a bike, you are too busy staying alive, to worry about work, money family etc."

I took his advise, did my DAS and got a bandit. 6 days later I was taken out from behind. In that 6 days my character had changed so much that my missus did not complain when I then bought the SV. I am a calmer happier person riding a bike. Without it I think I would have had that heart attack by now.

So my view, riding a bike has certainly saved my life. (I am also more concious of the need to watch my weight more though as a result of wearing the power ranger costume)

Mike1234
09-02-05, 01:00 PM
Surely the best thing you can do, for yourself and for her, is to take as much advanced training as you can get.

Even if an incident is going to be down to someone else doing something stupid the simple act of learning to look far enough ahead means you can stop yourself getting in to situations where incidents occur.

You are still at risk but it should help both of you be more comfortable with you riding a bike.

Big Bad Al
09-02-05, 01:29 PM
I personally think the SV is safer. Better brakes, bigger wheels. Play up the positive aspects and tell her you will be careful.

Good luck!

The wifes RS 125 could easily outbrake the SV and go round corners better too, so safety aint an issue, they do have decent braking and suspension, the sv front brake is well budget. oh..it was derestricted too and did 115... :shock:

Ok - so he should get an rs 125 or a bigger bike. Anything to get off a scoot would be safer imo and I do speak from experience of scooting down the same stretch of commute as kjames does......

zx6man
09-02-05, 01:33 PM
Too right..the 50cc'ers are well dangerous....you feel more vunerable on the roads than pushbikes!!

Steve H
09-02-05, 01:41 PM
Big bad Al. A well ridden SV would cr**p all over a well ridden RS125.
Whilst the RS125 is Gorgeous and tricked up, lets not pretend that it is anything more than a fast 125 that weighs 142 kgs.
Cue ZX6r man! :wink:

Nick762
09-02-05, 02:10 PM
When I was much younger, about 11 I suppose, I first asked my mother (who used to ride on my dad's pillion) about getting a motorcycle when I was old enough and got the usual response e.g. they are dangerous. "If you're in a car and you get hit, the car gets damaged but on a bike it's you that gets hit." My favourite excuse however was "when you get a girlfriend, it will be much easier to take her out if you have a car." I'm not sure if that was advice about the advantages of having a decent sized back seat or she simply didn't want her little boy hanging with a tattooed leather clad bear swilling biker chick :?

Bikes got put on a back burner for the next few decades until I was made redundant and lost my company car. I was married by this time and the wife was anti bikes. I just about managed to persuade her that a bike would be useful as I had got a temporary job locally but then found a permanent one which involved a 50 mile round trip on the A2 and M25. Again she put her foot down. I should have seen the signs back then, I'd visit my parents once in a blue moon and after ten minutes, she'd be on the phone badgering me about how much longer I was going to be...

Anyway a few years down the line, free from the matrimonial shackles once more I used the possibility of redundancy (rumours about outsourcing) as an excuse to take my DAS back in 2001. It was either that or a month in Australia... tough choice! Oddly enough my parents didn't object this time.

As it was, the outsourcing never happened and with some fairly hairy solicitors bills, a bike was not an option as I still had the works car. I went cold turkey in a big way. Took me months to come down :(

In the end I took advantage of the housing boom and unlocked some of the equity in my flat to pay the solicitor and have some money left over... I didn't deliberately wait until my parents were on a cruise on the other side of the world but that's just the way it turned out. I had visited a friend who lived on a farm and they had an old dirt bike. I tried it out to see if I could still ride and the rush hit me, I just had to get me one of these!

At first I just wanted anything cheap with two wheels and an engine, even looked at a couple of beat up GS500s for about £700. I found a NTV650 for £1000 and fell in love with a used CB500 that was absolutely imaculate for about £1800 (but some b@st@d bought it before I could test ride it). I realised by then that I was willing to pay more for a decent machine and looking further afield found a number of used SV650s in the Bike Shop in Faversham at a price I could afford. I had liked the SV since I saw one in the office car park but didn't want to buy privately because I just didn't know enough about bikes. Until now, second hand ones had been too expensive through dealers.

Even at 40, I still felt a bit guilty, the conversation with the olds went something like:

"Hi, you're looking well, have a good time? Hope the cabins were confortably, bought a bike, what was the ship like.... "

And the rest is history.

My g/f is not exactly pro but respects my feelings. I'm working on getting her onto the pillion but she says it looks uncomfortable. Maybe have to wait till I get a GS1200...

However, there is one more point I will make. I did consider that biking had its risks and if I didn't really need a bike I questioned the wisdom of buying one just for fun. At about this time, my cousin who had spent most of her life hanging by her fingernails from some of the most dangerous mountains in the world was killed. A footpath collapsed and she fell into a deep gorge while out walking in Scotland less than 1/4 mile from the car park. You cannot second guess fate.

northwind
09-02-05, 02:44 PM
My mum and dad were OK when I told them I was getting a bike, though they were predictably smug when I set out to do it all by myself and it all f***ed up :) They weren't too pleased when they found out just how little training you need to get on the road though- they're actually happier with me doing DAS and getting a real bike than doing CBT and monkeying about on my 125. My g/f at the time was very patronising, her dad had a Busa...

Though I've still not told them I've got a tattoo :)

Ceri JC
09-02-05, 03:31 PM
I started saving for a bike when I was 17, my mum found the cash and asked what it was for. I explained and she went a bit bonkers, saying that whilst I lived with them, there was no way I was getting a bike. This riled me a bit as my elder brother had a cb125 for a couple of years (although to my parents knowledge, it was a bit of scrap and never ran!) and used to ride with his mates.

I bit my tongue (no point landing my brother in it) and never mentioned it again. 5 years later, having moved out properly, coupled with my best mate getting a bike, it rapidly moved to the top of my to "do list".

BURNER
09-02-05, 03:35 PM
I met a nice girl when I was 29, really sweet. When I crashed my XJ650 into a BMW she even drove me around to physio and places coz I couldn't walk or drive. After 6 months and I was all mended. I announced that for my 30th birthday I'd be getting a new bike..... Tears and emotional blackmail followed..... When I bought the gixer she went hysterical!
I reckon she was just jealous.

Balky001
09-02-05, 03:40 PM
I met a nice girl when I was 29, really sweet. When I crashed my XJ650 into a BMW she even drove me around to physio and places coz I couldn't walk or drive. After 6 months and I was all mended. I announced that for my 30th birthday I'd be getting a new bike..... Tears and emotional blackmail followed..... When I bought the gixer she went hysterical!
I reckon she was just jealous.

Doesn't sound like this sweet girl is your current girlfriend. Did she stay or did she go. Hope you kept the Gixer either way! :wink:

caines
09-02-05, 05:09 PM
I had an RS and I would no way recommend it for big mileage. I asked my dealer to derestrict it on the 'low down' as I was still on a provisional at the time. He did a **** job of it and only drilled out the exhaust port.

Once you derestrict them they are much more of a competition engine (all be it a small one) and are prone to breaking ( I couldnt be arsed to sit there every morning for ages letting it warm up mind), getting it started in winter was a nightmare aswell.

Contrary to some comments in here I would have to say being an SV owner that the SV would **** on the RS no problems at all, although the RS suspension and brakes are ace its hardwork working a 6 speed 125 on a daily basis.

I would get the RS250 tell the wife its only 5mph faster than your old one. RS 125's are trouble in my experience although I kaned it everyday and generally abused it :lol:

lynw
09-02-05, 06:07 PM
Ive told you what I think when I chatted with you at soho....

At the end of the day, its YOUR LIFE. You cant live it how you think other people want you to and be happy. If you get yourself sorted - and that comes down to making a decision and it has to be YOUR decision about what you want - then everything else falls in line.

If people TRULY loved you theyd accept you for who you are and accept what you want to do. It doesnt stop them worrying but they shouldnt stop you from doing something you want.

Find something your girlfriend really loves doing, tell her you want her to stop doing it in return. Then she'll get an idea what shes asking you to do.

My mum doesnt like me being on the bike, especially after the incident on 28th January. But people die in cars, crossing pedestrian crossings, on trains. Youre girlfriend asking you to never go out? dont think so, but to the ignorant motorcycling seems high risk. Its YOU who reduces the risk as much as you can by the bike, clothing and way of riding.

I got caught out - sometimes it happens but if youre careful, you should minimise the risk. But you have to be realistic too.

At the end of the day, its your choice. Do you want to be with someone who cant accept you for who you really are or do you want to get a bike and see where it leads? There are lots of single bike friendly girls out there... honest.... just go to a rally mate :wink: :lol:

I spent 15 years in bad relationships because I was afraid of being on my own. But I read somewhere, nothing is more lonely than being in a bad relationship... and its true. People stay together because theyre afraid of being on their own and thats the worst reason to be in a relationship.

ok, tuppenceworth dispensed... :oops: :D

kjames
09-02-05, 06:13 PM
i thought about going down the "right in that case you should stop doing....urm yoga, in case you hurt yourself, you never know your leg might just pop off and i dont want to be pushing you around for the rest of your life".... luckily stopped half way through that strand of the argument.

i saw an RS15 today, next to a kebab shop surrounded by 'Hoodie' youths and to be honest they are nice looking bikes.. but dont think i'll be happy for that long on one... and sounds like they're not that practical...rs250 (without stickers sounds interesting), i even reckon i could by a 125, ride it for a while and then trade it in for a 250 and she wouldnt notice!!!, same colour obviously.

i tihnk i'll do my test in beginning of march anyway, and then maybe try her again. once she's had the wedding dress made i reckon the marriage is a done deal :D

k

lynw
09-02-05, 06:16 PM
oh and personally, think a bigger bike is safer than a smaller one... get the SV.... go on.... dare ya!! :lol:

BoltonSte
10-02-05, 12:03 AM
I had some issues with my folks/GF when I wanted to get a bike, went through the usual disscussions, they ended up saying "why don't you get a small one first" OK though I then went on PBx's and I was sold, booked my DAS and got the SV, one of the biggest winners, tell her you will be fully armoured up, get good gear and do some advanced training, after all, how many coppers do you hear about falling off bikes.......sites company excluded obviously,

Then go buy a bike, and turn up on it, my family and now wife fell in love with it soon as they saw it, my opinion, you should not be with someone who does not respect your choices, it's not like you are saying you want to become a hit man or a drug dealer, because accidents happen does not make it dangerous, people have died bungee jumping, does that mean she won't let yu do that?

IKTWH

ste

Cos
10-02-05, 03:39 PM
I currently have a tuono 125 which has the same two stroke engine as the RS and reckon if you are planning on keeping it for more than a year then don't bother with one. I have looked after mine and serviced it reguarly but its not suitable for long journeys or being kept as a long term bike. If your Mrs would be happy with you having a less powerful bike then restrict the SV.

Like me you will find that you outgrow the 125 and will want more power after a year at the most anyway.

kjames
10-02-05, 06:24 PM
it's not like you are saying you want to become a hit man or a drug dealer, because accidents happen does not make it dangerous, people have died bungee jumping, does that mean she won't let yu do that?

IKTWH

ste

one of the classic lines during our 'discussion was she wouldnt have gone out with me if she'd known i was going to be a biker or sky diver' so she covered herself against me doing anything dangerous... :(

ok, anyone for fishing?? shallow water of course.
anyway, going to book my DAS and then bicker over what bike i buy

k

Jelster
10-02-05, 06:36 PM
These women really do play with your emotions don't they... :?

I had a FS1E at 16, and a bike at 17, which got rear ended at at set of lights; it killed my wonderful RD250, but I came out unscathed. My parents were not happy about the bike, but put up with it as I needed to get to and from work. After the RD was written off I went for 4 wheels as I'd passed my test.

At the age of 40, with some disposable income I told the wife that I wanted a BMW M3 but she wouldn't let me spend £35k on a car (why not ?) so as I had always wanted to pass my bike test I did my DAS. The Mrs thought this would be just another fad (little did she know! :lol: ). So, months went by and I was loving the SV, and the social side of biking (formation of the Soho Massive) became really good too.

Then I had an off. Everything changed, she started panicing if I was in late, tried finding reasons for me to not go out on a Sunday until it all came to a head one Friday evening. We sat and talked (we never argue, honest..) she told me how she was worried about me, I said that biking had become such a part of me that I couldn't give it up. Then she said the phrase that I think you're looking for:

"You know how much I don't like you riding but it means so much to you that I could never ask you to give it up".

I decided to cut back on the rideouts and take the IAM. Two and half years after my DAS I'm still doing 15k miles a year but being selective when and where I do it. Both of my offs have been on the way to work, so I've cut down on the commuting (although the job has forced me to take the car more anyway). We've struck a happy medium, and we're now even looking at getting her on the back for a few rides this year.

If she loves you she'll understand, believe me, my wife and I have been together for over 20 years and I know I was pushing her to the limit. Biking is a very selfish hobby, you do it for your pleasure nobody elses. Only you can make the decision whether to continue or not. Getting a 125 is not the answer, you want to progress onto a better class of machine and to do that you need closure on this, now...

.

454697819
11-02-05, 12:41 PM
This goes to point out im a very luck man then, my gf loves bikes, ddint even batter an eye lid whn i mentioned the TL 1000, she only mentioned the cost (its only 3 grand dear)

Shes wants my sv, nearly my entire familly at sum point has had bikes, we have had crashes and accideints, but equally the same amount in cars!

i was told i wanst allowed a 50cc bike cause they didnt have enough power, but i got 1 at 16, mum even frontwed the loan for me!
then i did my licence, and bough the sv as the moped became un reliable so the sv was called for!

If my gf said i couldnt have a bike, then im sorry but thats denying who i am, and i wouldnt like that.

it would be worth doing ur full test and then possibly buying sommat smaller? that way the licence wont be a problem and if ever she changes her mind, an sv could be on the cards!
Do what makes you happy!

Alex