View Full Version : Phucking Evil Pheasants
Is it just me or are these little feathered balls of pure evil out to purposely take down bikers?.
On my travels today I passed several that stood at the side of the road then decided that I was close enough to knock me off by either running in front of me or flying out in front of me at the last minute.
Natural selection dictates these little buggers should have been extinct a long time ago - god was either very hungover or having a really really bad day when he designed the pheasant, perhaps he had a YTS student in that day...I don't know.......
I've never known a more stupid creature that is still exists today, I've even seen them run to the other side of the road then decide they want to run back again despite running straight into traffic.
It's not rocket science, if you have wings, don't run across the phucking ground!!!!......you can fly above the traffic!!!!! - use them!!!.
I'm starting to feel that these are not actually real pheasants, but instead they are radio controlled robots, sent out to destroy bikers by Richard Brunstrom. :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil:
Apologies for my phrench but I can see why people take to shooting them with guns now.
I once ran one down in a van (me in the van, not the pheasant :wink: ) and it tookages to find. They don't seem to die straight away, thye just keep running until the adrenalin stops, and that can be a bloody long way :lol: :lol: :lol: and I still didn't end up eating it as the wife (at the time) wouldn't let me cut it's throat and leave it hanging upside down for several days in the cellar :cry:
OF.uk - There's a nice fat male Mallard duck, deceased in the road in Cardiff Bay if your peckish :), I would not have liked to have been the cause of its demise.
http://www.rspb.org.uk/Images/mallardmale_tcm3-21085.jpg
Captain Nemo
18-03-05, 09:15 AM
when i was a youngstar, a pheasant commited suicide by running into the front wheel of my suzuki 125 gamma, it partly went through the wheel, then hit the forks, the head was pulled off, this made quite a mess of the bike( and my pants) poor bird came to a quick end and for the next few days i was treated to a smell not dissimilar to KFC as the remains burnt onto my manifold and engine....
mmmm crispy duck, KFC....I'm getting rather peckish!
diamond
18-03-05, 09:30 AM
Never hit a pheasant on my bike but penty in my car, they leave a good sized dent, so hate to thing what they do to me on my bike. :shock:
Cloggsy
18-03-05, 09:36 AM
Never hit a pheasant on my bike but penty in my car, they leave a good sized dent, so hate to thing what they do to me on my bike. :shock:
I hit a rather plump pigeon whilst on a test drive in an Audi TT :shock: - I took the car back to the dealers & left sharpish 8-[ I didn't check for damage :oops:
P.S. IMHO they're crap BTW :!:
diamond
18-03-05, 09:44 AM
Driven by kn#bs usually as well, friend of mine got hit by one, he was already goin round a roundabout and the TT pulled onto it and hit him. Another case of Sorry mate didn't see you. He was riding a bright green ZX6 with matching leathers you can't make yourself much more visible. That was the end of the ZX6 and the end of his knee, The bloke even tried to blame him. Kn#b!
I once ran one down in a van (me in the van, not the pheasant :wink: ) and it tookages to find. They don't seem to die straight away, thye just keep running until the adrenalin stops, and that can be a bloody long way :lol: :lol: :lol: and I still didn't end up eating it as the wife (at the time) wouldn't let me cut it's throat and leave it hanging upside down for several days in the cellar :cry:
Why did you want to cut its throat and hang it upside down?
Why did you want to cut its throat and hang it upside down?
Sounds a bit gruesome when it's put like that :shock:
Nice in a pie, though :thumbsup:
Carsick
18-03-05, 10:48 AM
I agree, pheasants are psychotic and evil.
Pigeons aren't that much better and I've had to duck for a seagull a couple of times.
Never hit a pheasant on my bike but penty in my car, they leave a good sized dent, so hate to thing what they do to me on my bike. :shock:
I hit a rather plump pigeon whilst on a test drive in an Audi TT :shock: - I took the car back to the dealers & left sharpish 8-[ I didn't check for damage :oops:
P.S. IMHO they're crap BTW :!:
My boss use to drive one - I was never that impressed when he gave me the keys. If you keep the turbo on song there great, but who wants to be doing a constant 5k rpm when not on a bike...
Anyway back onto the thread rails... He hit a bird in his TT and it got stuck in th mesh at the bottom of the front bumper. He kept it there so keep his scary insane ex away from him (he thought she'd be worried by the dead bird, not through Voodoo :) ) She was a nightmare... Sent emails from a politie@hotmail.nl (or similar) saying she had committed suicide and the police (politie) knew he used to go out with her. What were his feelings, did he feel giulty over her suicide, did he really love her or was it just a one night stand etc etc etc etc. Freak...
Ken McCulloch
18-03-05, 12:13 PM
Is it just me or are these little feathered balls of pure evil out to purposely take down bikers?.
Too right mate, they are a major hazard in some places. Up in Scotland we have deer running across the roads all the time as well.
The founder of this site died in circumstances which AFAIR were strongly suggestive of a bird strike and subsequent loss of control. It's not just paranoia.
Natural selection dictates these little buggers should have been extinct a long time ago - god was either very hungover or having a really really bad day when he designed the pheasant, perhaps he had a YTS student in that day...I don't know.......
Well they are nothing to do with that fine man Mr Brunstrom. Pheasants are only here because the landed gentry and their capitalist pals have them bred for shooting. They are not even a native species unlike our fine Scottish grouse, but were introduced to rich men's estates in the 18th century or thereabouts. *******s.
Carsick
18-03-05, 12:14 PM
They are not even a native species unlike our fine Scottish grouse, but were introduced to rich men's estates in the 18th century or thereabouts. b*stards.
Grouse aren't much better though!
At least I don't see them very often, they seem a bit less inclined to hang around the roads.
Spiderman
18-03-05, 01:27 PM
I avoided hitting one of these death wish birds...or Pheasnats as they are known on your planet.
I got out the car to see if i had got it or not only to be confronted with the evil things running at me. I get in the car and drive away and its still chasing me in the rear view mirror.
First time i had road rage from an animal :shock:
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