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View Full Version : Joke, with apologies.....


Jabba
19-05-06, 11:31 AM
A South African gold miner loses his leg in a mining accident and is sat in hospital talking to his mate.


"Well that's me f*cked, who on earth's going to want a one legged gold digger?"





His mate replies "Well, you could try Paul McCartney"

Law
19-05-06, 11:31 AM
:lol:

kciN
19-05-06, 11:32 AM
Hey Sharisso will be in soon to say he posted that the other day!! :wink:

sharriso74
19-05-06, 11:33 AM
Hey Sharisso will be in soon to say he posted that the other day!! :wink:

You called????

Jabba
19-05-06, 11:33 AM
Hey Sharisso will be in soon to say he posted that the other day!! :wink:

I wasn't here the other day :roll:

Anonymous
19-05-06, 11:34 AM
Hey Sharisso will be in soon to say he posted that the other day!! :wink:

I wasn't here the other day :roll:

Search? :wink: :lol: :P

Jabba
19-05-06, 11:35 AM
Hey Sharisso will be in soon to say he posted that the other day!! :wink:

I wasn't here the other day :roll:

Search? :wink: :lol: :P

Too easy.............too geeky...........doesn't help my post count :wink:

Aurora
19-05-06, 12:03 PM
It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg. Personally, I think it's prosthetic ...

kciN
19-05-06, 12:05 PM
It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg. Personally, I think it's prosthetic ...

:roll: :wink: :D

sharriso74
19-05-06, 12:07 PM
It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg. Personally, I think it's prosthetic ...

Any more of that and I will have you up on charges, frankly you havent got a leg to stand on.

Biker Biggles
19-05-06, 12:08 PM
She was a model before she met Sir Paul.
A bit wooden on stage though.

kciN
19-05-06, 12:11 PM
Don't forget, she was actually hit by a copper on a bike!!

She wasn't drunk at the time, but they said she was legless after...


:?



Easy...

Couerdelion
19-05-06, 12:31 PM
Apparantly it all started to go wrong about 18 months ago.

Picture the scene... Paul adding the last bit of tinsel to the Christmas tree, Heather hanging a bauble...

Paul - "What would you like for christmas darling?"
Heather - "Ooooh, a plane would be nice...."
Paul - "No problem. A razor for the other leg?"

sharriso74
19-05-06, 12:43 PM
Aparently the rot had set in

UlsterSV
19-05-06, 12:59 PM
Alot of people questioned how genuine she was.

Personally, I always thought she was a wee bit fake.

sharriso74
19-05-06, 01:03 PM
She was great at yoga though. One leg behind her head the other in the living room

Filipe M.
19-05-06, 01:13 PM
Stop it guys, my screen is getting sprinkled with ice cream. :lol:

Amanda M
19-05-06, 01:16 PM
Heather denied having an affair, but his lawyer cites infidelity and says she hasn't got a leg to stand on :wink:

UlsterSV
19-05-06, 01:17 PM
We shouldn't laugh really. The poor girl must be in pieces.

sharriso74
19-05-06, 01:18 PM
Bout time Sir Paul told her to hop it

Jabba
19-05-06, 01:19 PM
<Peter Cook mode>
Paul had nothing against her left leg. Unfortunately, neither did she.
</Peter Cook mode>

Amanda M
19-05-06, 01:21 PM
A poem by Paul McCartney:

I lay upon a grassy bank
My hands were all a quiver
I slowly removed her suspender belt
And her leg fell in the river


:P

Jabba
19-05-06, 01:22 PM
I'd forgotten about that one :lol:






:P

Stingo
19-05-06, 01:35 PM
I heard she was a bit of a hopper!! :lol:

Jabba
19-05-06, 01:43 PM
Paul obviously noticed that something was afoot..........

Amanda M
19-05-06, 01:44 PM
I'm sure he'll miss their games of hopscotch, even though she won every time :P

Viney
19-05-06, 01:48 PM
Its all over the fact that he wouldnt buy her a plane for christmas...he said, cant you just get your leg waxed!

Jabba
19-05-06, 02:05 PM
Its all over the fact that he wouldnt buy her a plane for christmas...he said, cant you just get your leg waxed!

Bet that rubbed her up the wrong way..........went against the grain........

Jabba
19-05-06, 02:05 PM
Did she tell him to get knotted?

UlsterSV
19-05-06, 02:11 PM
Veet for one leg and Autosol for the other.

kciN
19-05-06, 02:28 PM
Will you lot stop it, I'm reading them out to my office colleague and we're p**in' ourselves!! :lol: :lol:

kciN
19-05-06, 02:32 PM
http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/38413000/jpg/_38413167_heather_300.jpg
Ho Ho Ho

Diveboy
20-05-06, 10:01 AM
I got off with her in Sunderland a long time ago. She is very attractive, her mate was better though :P :twisted:

Not sure but I think she had both legs then, anyway I digress

BabyJ
20-05-06, 11:54 AM
Will you still need me, will you still feed me when I'm 64.... (nearly)

No cos' I'll have left by then!!

:D :D

Very funny gags guys!

:D :D :D :D :D :D