Symapthy for my friend please - he had an accident.

[Spiderman]

My friend was working in an industrial kitcken the other week, you know the kind that makes all the ready meals for Letsco/Sainsway/Safeburys/ Wall-Fart etc.

He's a highly paid and highly skilled absailing engineer and was working on the pressure guage at the top of one of the big vats but had to undo his saftey harness to reach the part he was working on.
He slipped and fell into a huge vat of simmering curry mix. :shock:


He's OK now but......





























But he was in a Korma for a very long time.

:lol:

(i'll be here all week folks)

[jonboy]

If you're trying to curry favour, you're failing miserably :lol: .


.

[El Saxo]

If you're trying to curry favour, you're failing miserably :lol: .


.

shouldn't that be phal-ing miserably?




TAXI :lol:

[sharriso74]

Shami on you

[Marshall]

OH DEAR LORD!!!!

please i beg you no more!!!

[Spiderman]

Well it is Fry-day and i thought another rubbish joke would help pass a few seconds of your lives for you.

Naan of you have called a taxi for me so far so it can be all that bad.

[Balky001]

If he fell he could have low blood pressure - did they check his tikka?

[jonboy]

I'm so seriously tempted to lock this thread :lol: .


.

[Jase22]

Don't get curried away it's only a bit of fun. :lol: :lol:

[Spiderman]

Hey, i dont often post jokes so when i do you gotta expect the worst.

Bombay aloo.

errm. :?

[***Steve***]

If you're trying to curry favour, you're failing miserably :lol: .


.

I can't believe you're (ras)malaigning his charachter.

[Jabba]

He just wanted to bhagee in on the bad joke scene.

[Mr Toad]

Goodbye every Bhaji, I've got to go :wink:



Sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody IIRC

[Peter Henry]

I thought the story could have been spiced up a bit myself? Like he emerged from said vat naked and with his kebab red raw? :wink: :P

[***Steve***]

Goodbye every Bhaji, I've got to go :wink:



Sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody IIRC

How could you butcher the classics like that :shock:

You sir are a neander-dall

[jonboy]

(sobbing) ...please stop.


.

[Jabba]

C'mon spiderman, pilau the other one.................

[Daimo]

:lol: :lol: :lol: @ this post...

[Peter Henry]

Spidey....Your as Madrass as a hatter! :P

[Balky001]

did anyone let is popandmom know, poor chapati. He must have thought he was Binji jumping when he phall.

[Peter Henry]

I bet he feels a bit of a palak now. With all that sauce on him I bet he had a saagwala. :?

[keithd]

i tried to come up with a funny, but phaaled miserably....

[Mr Toad]

Spidey - are you going to Frith Street tonight - I hope it doesn't get too chilli

I'm going to poppadom in a mo

[Peter Henry]

Spidey...Is this your Irish mate? Rogan Josh? :P :P

[Jabba]

Spidey - are you going to Frith Street tonight - I hope it doesn't get too chilli

You mean it could be Jalfreizi-ing there tonight?

[sharriso74]

Goodbye every Bhaji, I've got to go :wink:

Sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody IIRC

How could you butcher the classics like that :shock:

You sir are a neander-dall

Ok just for you...

Naan, just killed a man,
Poppadom against his head Had Lime Pickle Now He's Dead
Naan, Dinner's Just Begun
But Now I'm Gonna Crap it All Away
Naan, ohhhh ohhhhhh
Didn't mean to make you cry
Seen Nothing Yet Just See the Loo Tomorrow
Curry On, Curry On Cause Nothing Really Madras

Too Late, My Dinner's Gone,
Sends Shivers Down my Spine
Rectum Aching All the Time
Goodbye Onion Bhaji, I've got to go
Gotta Leave You All Behind And Use the Loo
Nann, Ohhhhh Ohhhhh
The Doopiaza is so Mild
I Sometimes Wish We'd Never Come Here at All
Curry On, Curry On Cause Nothing Really Madras

I See a Little Chicken Tikka on the Side
Rogan Josh, Rogan Josh, Pass the Chutney Made of Mango
Vindaloo Does Nicely Very Very Spicy Meat
Byriani (Byriani) Byriani (Byriani) Byriani and a Nann (A Vindaloo loo loo loo)

I've Eaten Balti, Somebody Help me
He's Eaten Balti, Get Him to the Lavatory
Stand you Well Back Cause the Loo is Quarantine
Here it Comes There it Goes Technicolour Yawn
I Chunder NO! It's Coming up Again (There he Goes)
Coming Back Again (Up Again)
Here it Goes Again (No, No, No, No, No, No NO)
On my Knees I'm on my Knees
On his Knees, Oh, There he Goes
This Vindaloo It's About to Wreck my Guts
Poor Me.... Poor Me..... Poor Meeee....

(Guitar Solo)

So you Think you can Chunder and Feel Alright?
So you try to eat Curry and Drink Beer all Night?
Oh Maybe, But now you Puke Like a Baby
Just had to Come out It Just had to Come Right out in Here

(Reprise)
Korma, sag or bhuna
bhaji, balti or naan
Nothing makes a difference
Nothing makes a difference
Nothing makes a difference To meee....
Anyway, my wind blows....shshshsh

[Peter Henry]

He's a bit of a paratha your mate isn't he? :P

Those lyrics so much better than the original! :P :P :P :P

[Mr Toad]

:winner:


:nomore:

[pegasus]

Goodbye every Bhaji, I've got to go :wink:

Sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody IIRC

How could you butcher the classics like that :shock:

You sir are a neander-dall

Ok just for you...

Naan, just killed a man,
Poppadom against his head Had Lime Pickle Now He's Dead
Naan, Dinner's Just Begun
But Now I'm Gonna Crap it All Away
Naan, ohhhh ohhhhhh
Didn't mean to make you cry
Seen Nothing Yet Just See the Loo Tomorrow
Curry On, Curry On Cause Nothing Really Madras

Too Late, My Dinner's Gone,
Sends Shivers Down my Spine
Rectum Aching All the Time
Goodbye Onion Bhaji, I've got to go
Gotta Leave You All Behind And Use the Loo
Nann, Ohhhhh Ohhhhh
The Doopiaza is so Mild
I Sometimes Wish We'd Never Come Here at All
Curry On, Curry On Cause Nothing Really Madras

I See a Little Chicken Tikka on the Side
Rogan Josh, Rogan Josh, Pass the Chutney Made of Mango
Vindaloo Does Nicely Very Very Spicy Meat
Byriani (Byriani) Byriani (Byriani) Byriani and a Nann (A Vindaloo loo loo loo)

I've Eaten Balti, Somebody Help me
He's Eaten Balti, Get Him to the Lavatory
Stand you Well Back Cause the Loo is Quarantine
Here it Comes There it Goes Technicolour Yawn
I Chunder NO! It's Coming up Again (There he Goes)
Coming Back Again (Up Again)
Here it Goes Again (No, No, No, No, No, No NO)
On my Knees I'm on my Knees
On his Knees, Oh, There he Goes
This Vindaloo It's About to Wreck my Guts
Poor Me.... Poor Me..... Poor Meeee....

(Guitar Solo)

So you Think you can Chunder and Feel Alright?
So you try to eat Curry and Drink Beer all Night?
Oh Maybe, But now you Puke Like a Baby
Just had to Come out It Just had to Come Right out in Here

(Reprise)
Korma, sag or bhuna
bhaji, balti or naan
Nothing makes a difference
Nothing makes a difference
Nothing makes a difference To meee....
Anyway, my wind blows....shshshsh

hilarious...actually found myself singing along :lol:

[Ping]

You want to send that one via email and get one of those voice email readers to go through it. Now THAT'S funny.


Tikka hike, the lot of ya!

[Spiderman]

This thread really has tikka-ld my funny bone :lol:

[***Steve***]

As well as Queen Some of the other songs on his iPod....

Tears on my Pilau - Kylie
Girlfriend in a Korma - The Smiths
Saad Aloo, push pineapple - Black Lace

[Peter Henry]

And that classic from the "The Man in Black" himself Johnny Cash....


"and it burns,burns,burns

that ring of fire..."

[Sudoxe]

Look your all getting curried away. The mods should tikka you off for this!

Dan

[lynw]

Look your all getting curried away. The mods should tikka you off for this!

Dan

no they wont, it would be bad korma and theyd end up reincarnated as an ant.

[Sudoxe]

Look your all getting curried away. The mods should tikka you off for this!

Dan

no they wont, it would be bad korma and theyd end up reincarnated as an ant.

Almost as bad as a curry on film....

[***Steve***]

Almost as bad as a curry on film...


Or...

Samosa like it Hot
Educating Riata
Lassi Come Home

[Lissa]

Goodbye every Bhaji, I've got to go :wink:

Sung to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody IIRC

How could you butcher the classics like that :shock:

You sir are a neander-dall

Ok just for you...

Naan, just killed a man,
Poppadom against his head Had Lime Pickle Now He's Dead
Naan, Dinner's Just Begun
But Now I'm Gonna Crap it All Away
Naan, ohhhh ohhhhhh
Didn't mean to make you cry
Seen Nothing Yet Just See the Loo Tomorrow
Curry On, Curry On Cause Nothing Really Madras

Too Late, My Dinner's Gone,
Sends Shivers Down my Spine
Rectum Aching All the Time
Goodbye Onion Bhaji, I've got to go
Gotta Leave You All Behind And Use the Loo
Nann, Ohhhhh Ohhhhh
The Doopiaza is so Mild
I Sometimes Wish We'd Never Come Here at All
Curry On, Curry On Cause Nothing Really Madras

I See a Little Chicken Tikka on the Side
Rogan Josh, Rogan Josh, Pass the Chutney Made of Mango
Vindaloo Does Nicely Very Very Spicy Meat
Byriani (Byriani) Byriani (Byriani) Byriani and a Nann (A Vindaloo loo loo loo)

I've Eaten Balti, Somebody Help me
He's Eaten Balti, Get Him to the Lavatory
Stand you Well Back Cause the Loo is Quarantine
Here it Comes There it Goes Technicolour Yawn
I Chunder NO! It's Coming up Again (There he Goes)
Coming Back Again (Up Again)
Here it Goes Again (No, No, No, No, No, No NO)
On my Knees I'm on my Knees
On his Knees, Oh, There he Goes
This Vindaloo It's About to Wreck my Guts
Poor Me.... Poor Me..... Poor Meeee....

(Guitar Solo)

So you Think you can Chunder and Feel Alright?
So you try to eat Curry and Drink Beer all Night?
Oh Maybe, But now you Puke Like a Baby
Just had to Come out It Just had to Come Right out in Here

(Reprise)
Korma, sag or bhuna
bhaji, balti or naan
Nothing makes a difference
Nothing makes a difference
Nothing makes a difference To meee....
Anyway, my wind blows....shshshsh

THAT is one of the funniest things I've read in a long time :D :D :D :D

[Biker Biggles]

Lucky he fell in that vat, he could have fallen vindaloo.

[valleyboy]

Oh dear... some bad ones being thrown around... :lol:

[Biker Biggles]

That always happens after a curry.

[Peter Henry]

In some countries diving in to a vat of curry sauce is an integral part of the kulcha.

[lynw]

In some countries diving in to a vat of curry sauce is an integral part of the kulcha.

Oh dahl-ing Peter, your naan would turn in her grave knowing you've sunk to being so punny :P :lol: :lol:

[Peter Henry]

Lyn..kadai have another try then? :P

[lynw]

Lyn..kadai have another try then? :P

Of course, wont stop a chat midway through, unless people jeera at the way its going.

[Peter Henry]

TBH not sure I could makhani improvement. :P

[didge]

ohh dear all the jokes are out now

[lynw]

TBH not sure I could makhani improvement. :P

gosht that really surprises me. methi-nks your muttar didnt raise you to rest on your laurels like this.

:P :lol: :lol:

[Peter Henry]

I think we should pakora this in now. :wink: :P

[lynw]

I think we should pakora this in now. :wink: :P

curd idea if its got too mirch for you. :twisted:

[Peter Henry]

Lynw..your being a bit of a roti now. :?

[Sudoxe]

Lynw..your being a bit of a roti now. :?
aloo aloo, whats going on ere then?

[Mr Toad]

ohh dear all the jokes are out now

oh no :shock:

It's just like a curry - you leave it stting in a pot on the stove & keep adding to it -
could go on for weeks . . . :lol:

[Peter Henry]

Nan of this makes any sense at all. Bawarchi.....I am sure someone will come out with a good one soon. One no doubt dal tarka lot of beating :wink: :P

[lynw]

Lynw..your being a bit of a roti now. :?
aloo aloo, whats going on ere then?

Peter Henrys getting a bit gobi I think now :twisted: :lol:

[Peter Henry]

LYN...

Kon kani? Would be a bit rude to be like that. :wink:

[sharriso74]

If this thread isn't locked soon we'll have to sag the mods

[Peter Henry]

Mods? Mak hani difference that you think? :?

[lynw]

Mods? Mak hani difference that you think? :?

Thats rice of you to say that PH.

Samosa running out of puns though :P :twisted:

[Sudoxe]

Mods? Mak hani difference that you think? :?

Thats rice of you to say that PH.

Samosa running out of puns though :P :twisted:

Samooosa hasnt even replied to this thread!..

[Biker Biggles]

Shall we bury annie?

[Peter Henry]

Lime running out of ideas tbh. :?

[lynw]

Lime running out of ideas tbh. :?

ghee, you suwa? this threads maida my day with all the powha jokes :P :twisted: :lol:

[Peter Henry]

I don't think Indian food is liked much in Liverpool as they dont seem to eat much of it doodhi? :P

[Peter Henry]

So I win then? :P Bharta time! :P

[Stingo]

You all seem to be in a bit of a pickle...Aloo, gobi there?

[Peter Henry]

I think Lyn must be muligatawny all over. :?

[lynw]

I think Lyn must be muligatawny all over. :?

Now thats just dum. At some point Im sure this thread will become feni again.

PS Feni is evil stuff. I bought some back from India with me... not even the hardened drinkers I knew could drink it :shock: :lol:

[Peter Henry]

Was starting to think we had closed the tan door on this! :wink:

[Jabba]

This thread's beginning to sagh now

[UlsterSV]

:nomore:

Please...

:nomore:

[Balky001]

had a slight mishap on the broads at the weekend, lost control of the boat and bindi bharji :oops: :oops:

[lynw]

had a slight mishap on the broads at the weekend, lost control of the boat and bindi bharji :oops: :oops:

well if you stood idli by and let it go no wonder it crashed. dosa look like a write off? :P :lol: :lol:

[Stingo]

Oh look, come on, don't take the pesh wari!! Time is tikka-ing by. :roll:

[lynw]

Oh look, come on, don't take the pesh wari!! Time is tikka-ing by. :roll:

Wondering if I could get away with the dum pukht one atm :wink: :P :lol: :lol: . But Im sure Mr Henry will be here shortly to bharta insults [all be it in a jovial fashion] :twisted:

[Peter Henry]

Just a tiny mutter from me at this point. :P