freakin it
16-03-07, 12:40 PM
following on from scoobs post, herein lies the laws of man!
Man law
No fruit (i.e. lime etc) is permissible in beer – this is the Don’t fruit the beer law
A Man to woman phone call should last no longer than 6 minutes
It is permissible to leave the sink unwashed after a hearty shave
The man who approaches a table full of girls gets first dibs
Never use the word "strip" when explaining a stag party to a woman
A man tells his mate if a female wants to get with him , even if he likes the female in question
Under no circumstances should men use scented hand lotion
A tan is permissible only if gained by accident – NEVER by credit card
Regardless of searing heat, a man may never alter his stride on hot sand
A man may engage in gardening – but it must be referred to as farming
A map may only be consulted before a journey has started – never during You may stop and ask for directions ONLY IF you are going to be late For: - a wedding, funeral or sh*g
A man shall never refer to his wife as “we are pregnant”
No man shall be permitted to have a drink with an umbrella in it, is pink or is fruit flavoured unless that man is holding it for his wife/girlfriend while she’s in the bathroom
When eating at an all you can eat buffet, it is a mans duty to continue eating until he considers the restaurant to have lost money.
A minimum of 3 minutes must pass before criticising a friends bbq technique.
Swim shorts must be never be sorter than 2inches above the knee
Man law
No fruit (i.e. lime etc) is permissible in beer – this is the Don’t fruit the beer law
A Man to woman phone call should last no longer than 6 minutes
It is permissible to leave the sink unwashed after a hearty shave
The man who approaches a table full of girls gets first dibs
Never use the word "strip" when explaining a stag party to a woman
A man tells his mate if a female wants to get with him , even if he likes the female in question
Under no circumstances should men use scented hand lotion
A tan is permissible only if gained by accident – NEVER by credit card
Regardless of searing heat, a man may never alter his stride on hot sand
A man may engage in gardening – but it must be referred to as farming
A map may only be consulted before a journey has started – never during You may stop and ask for directions ONLY IF you are going to be late For: - a wedding, funeral or sh*g
A man shall never refer to his wife as “we are pregnant”
No man shall be permitted to have a drink with an umbrella in it, is pink or is fruit flavoured unless that man is holding it for his wife/girlfriend while she’s in the bathroom
When eating at an all you can eat buffet, it is a mans duty to continue eating until he considers the restaurant to have lost money.
A minimum of 3 minutes must pass before criticising a friends bbq technique.
Swim shorts must be never be sorter than 2inches above the knee