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Jabba
19-03-07, 06:41 PM
Don't think we've done this before....

What are your favourite alternative (and hopefully funny) names for ordinary objects.

To start us off I give you:

"Flea Rake" for the hair comb :D
Biker Biggles
19-03-07, 07:03 PM
Ball bags.[-X
mattSV
19-03-07, 07:05 PM
Fun bags :p
fizzwheel
19-03-07, 07:07 PM
Hairnet - just for you Jabba :D
Jabba
19-03-07, 07:28 PM
Hairnet - just for you Jabba :D

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/twoponds/sv650/angrysmiley.gif

Should have seen that one coming............ :rolleyes:
kwak zzr
19-03-07, 07:30 PM
blandit
kwak zzr
19-03-07, 07:31 PM
jug's:smt043
John 675
19-03-07, 08:42 PM
min... cun.. sl.... ??? fairy - its about the only word to describe the bloody female organ that isnt offensive lol, [-X :D ? ? ?
skint
19-03-07, 09:12 PM
Over the shoulder bolder holder :p
Stingo
19-03-07, 09:17 PM
Oh - those sort of everyday objects. :D Front bottom anyone?


or



Zeppelins in the clouds. (Sausage and mash)
Tiger 55
19-03-07, 09:25 PM
Yaffling spanners or troffling rods for knife and fork :)
fizzwheel
19-03-07, 09:30 PM
Should have seen that one coming............ :rolleyes:

:smt040 :takeabow:
CoolGirl
19-03-07, 09:30 PM
Craptop. (self explanatory)

snuggly (neck warmer, esp when pilfered for use by child)

cheeselets (socks, after being worn by said child)
rigor
19-03-07, 09:54 PM
Yaffling spanners or troffling rods for knife and fork :)

Eating spanners is along the same lines :)

Dizzy Cusion (Television, from Sam's little bro when he couldn't talk proper)
kwak zzr
19-03-07, 10:28 PM
mince pies < eyes
Treacle
20-03-07, 12:00 AM
Knife and folk = Fighting irons
Boobs = Top ********
Money = Queen heads
Fuel = Motion Lotion
Pubes = Curly clock springs
Hatey Jakes = Fatty Cakes

To name but a few. :-)
Jabba
20-03-07, 08:53 AM
Zeppelins in the clouds. (Sausage and mash)

In a similar vein........

Skinheads on a Raft (Beans on Toast)
Stingo
20-03-07, 11:03 AM
Babies heads - Steak and kidney pudding

sh1ts - spaghetti hoops in tomato sauce (similarly Bits, tits etc)

diddly-dot - computer.

Nelson's dandruff - salt.
Lou M
20-03-07, 11:10 AM
Cow Juice=Milk

Nicked from a friend (who's on the forum, so I'd best mention him!). But I love it and have used it ever since.

Lardy Coke= non diet coke

doofer=remote control

dennis=dehumidifier

cousin it=satnav.

shall I go on or get my coat!
Swiss
20-03-07, 12:27 PM
Gypsy's Kiss - Pi55
Richard the Third - Turd - can then be paraphrased for " Just going for a Richard"
Stingo
20-03-07, 12:39 PM
Claret - blood


gash - rubbish


dirty tabber - smoker :D ;)
keithd
20-03-07, 01:13 PM
i call scoobs my little plum duff, but he's certainly not what i'd call ordinary...
Quedos
20-03-07, 01:48 PM
Sheep fur - wool
Filipe M.
20-03-07, 02:28 PM
Analog Writing Devices - pens and pencils. I can't use them to save my own life.
Swiss
20-03-07, 04:35 PM
Growler = Pork Pie
Goggle Box = TV
Laughing Tackle = Mouth
Peasant Wagon = Bus
Dicky Ticker
20-03-07, 04:46 PM
Cows juice+milk
Rat-**** = ratchet
Mouse-****= small ratchet
Squeaky meat=cheese
keithd
20-03-07, 05:11 PM
in the last few replies we've had gash (rubbish) and growler (pork pie)

really really not the alternatives i was expecting to read....:smt103
Baph
20-03-07, 05:24 PM
Analog Writing Devices - pens and pencils. I can't use them to save my own life.
Oh dear!

Erm...

Whatsit,
Thingy (and the derived thingymajig),
Dodah,
Whatjamacallit

All useful for any number of object, can be interchanged, and can be use as thus "Hey thingy, pass me the whatjamacallit will ya? The Dodah? Yeah, the thingymajig!"
Luckypants
20-03-07, 05:34 PM
Growler = Pork Pie...

:D not heard that in a while! :D
Tomcat
20-03-07, 06:01 PM
min... cun.. sl.... ??? fairy - its about the only word to describe the bloody female organ that isnt offensive lol, [-X :D ? ? ?

tupence ;)
Dicky Ticker
20-03-07, 06:22 PM
Open heart surgery
Jdubya
20-03-07, 06:33 PM
Banana hammock,
Poephol floss(afrikaans phrase for g-string)
thumper21
20-03-07, 07:17 PM
Council juice - water
cludge - toilet
hoodger - tv remote
Alpinestarhero
20-03-07, 07:37 PM
dooberry whatsit - anything

Matt
Stingo
20-03-07, 08:26 PM
in the last few replies we've had gash (rubbish) and growler (pork pie)

really really not the alternatives i was expecting to read....:smt103


How about 'lettuce leaves'? :D :smt023
Captain Nemo
21-03-07, 09:24 AM
i expect that when this thread, the creator was expecting less smut , but what the hell,

spam javellin
furry cup
froobs
Stingo
21-03-07, 10:15 AM
Trying on the trapper's hat.

Snarling at the busby


:fish:
keithd
21-03-07, 10:17 AM
How about 'lettuce leaves'? :D :smt023

wizards sleeve

horses collar

i could go on but on the grounds of "decency" i shall refrain for now!!:D
Jabba
21-03-07, 10:29 AM
in the last few replies we've had gash (rubbish) and growler (pork pie)

really really not the alternatives i was expecting to read....:smt103

Yep....me too, f'rinstance:

Growlers = skidders = males' underwear
Jabba
21-03-07, 10:30 AM
i expect that when this thread, the creator was expecting less smut....

Nope :lol:
Scoobs
21-03-07, 10:37 AM
wizards sleeve

horses collar

i could go on but on the grounds of "decency" i shall refrain for now!!:D

I'll carry on for you then :D

Upright bacon sandwich

Axe wound
Jabba
21-03-07, 10:50 AM
Muff = handle-bar mounted glove
John 675
21-03-07, 11:32 AM
Dont know if these have been done yet,

Tommy Tag - Fag

Tommy Tank - shaking hands with the gouverner of love . . . etc (you get the idea )

:smt073
Tomcat
22-03-07, 09:53 AM
I'll carry on for you then :D

Upright bacon sandwich

Axe wound

camels hoof (in jeans or tight trousers) ;)
Stingo
22-03-07, 11:32 AM
Twinkle **** - Ladies 'personal' deodorant. :smt082 :cheers:



Oh dear...I'd better get out of here....
stewie
22-03-07, 02:30 PM
top boll#cks - breasts
dirty pillows - breasts
wali jumblats - err.. breasts
baps - err breasts again,sorry
front bottom - ladies unmentionables

thank god for comprehensive education :)
independentphoto
22-03-07, 05:34 PM
"The Buttons" - remote control as in where the f### are the buttons?

:cool:
Jdubya
22-03-07, 05:38 PM
camels hoof (in jeans or tight trousers) ;)


Dont you mean camel toe?





*gets me coat and runs*
Tomcat
22-03-07, 05:48 PM
Dont you mean camel toe?





*gets me coat and runs*


oopps. yer, you get the jist!!
socommk23
22-03-07, 05:57 PM
hootnanny= lady bits!
backdoor= backside
jubblies= boobs
tackle= man bits
weaner in a warehouse= over used lady bits....did i cross a line with that one?
Tomcat
22-03-07, 06:06 PM
hootnanny= lady bits!
backdoor= backside
jubblies= boobs
tackle= man bits
weaner in a warehouse= over used lady bits....did i cross a line with that one?

nar!!


tommy t*t = poo
Mrs palm and her five naughty daughters = right hand
customized = cercumsized
Jabba
22-03-07, 07:20 PM
tommy t*t = poo
Mrs palm and her five naughty daughters = right hand
customized = cercumsized

Dump = water bomb = pony (and trap) = poo
whizz = slash = splash = jimmy riddle = wee = pee
Lou M
23-03-07, 08:55 AM
Plastics - group of girls who only care about their make up, hair, nails etc...
Tiger 55
23-03-07, 11:01 AM
Grolly, loogy, dockyard oyster - the green stuff I am currently coughing up that looks like something off the X Files.
Treacle
23-03-07, 07:06 PM
I'll carry on for you then :D

Upright bacon sandwich

Axe wound


Clowns Pocket.:jocolor:
thedonal
23-03-07, 07:31 PM
Badly packed kebab?
Stingo
23-03-07, 09:13 PM
Gunga water's dinner bags.....:-dd



currant bun - sun

tuppeny blood - those little 'action' war comic story things - Commando was one of them

Bishop's/commanche's boll0x - tinned plum tomatoes