Euwww, imodium moment

[MiniMatt]

Just thought I'd share this with the world. After all, what makes Britain great is undoubtedly humorous ar$e related anecdotes. We may have invented cricket and football but our greatest invention was surely the fart joke. We're also the only nation who still finds it funny.

Let me tell you, ladies and gentlemen, there is nothing, nothing, in this world that can reduce "I am Man, hear me Roar" to a meek snivelling wreck quicker than sitting down and simultaneously suffering an attack of anal incontinence. Of the runny kind.

I only offer thanks to the Lord (I would kneel but I'm scared what might happen) that I'm at home this morning rather than work, that home has both a shower and a washing machine, and that the house now smells of Dettol rather than what it used to smell of.

Any Guantanamo guards reading looking for new ways to "break the will" of the most iron willed slaves (I would call them prisoners, but remember the US won't even classify them as prisoners of war as that would give them too many rights...) - simply feed them laxatives, guaranteed to break a man's resolve in seconds....

[Ping]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

[Pedro68]

I'm beginning to wish I hadn't put quite so much pickle on my cheese n pickle sarnies now :pukel:

[Alpinestarhero]

For what reason did you take laxitives? Practical joke? Serious reason?

By any means, i wish you a speedy recovery....and that also I am glad to not be in your house at the moment!

GWS!

Matt

[MiniMatt]

Nah, I didn't take laxatives, just something with a very strong laxative effect. Quite what that was I'm not sure. My hunch is the steak & chips I had in the pub. The other half's hunch is that it was the Stella I had in the pub...

[Ed]

I take imodium before I go for a long run as else it gets mighty embarrassing by mile 15:smt046

[DoubleD]

Did you Smudge yourself.... LOL

[Ping]

Nah, I didn't take laxatives, just something with a very strong laxative effect. Quite what that was I'm not sure. My hunch is the steak & chips I had in the pub. The other half's hunch is that it was the Stella I had in the pub...
Ooh, was your steak rare? If so how rare? If it was VERY rare I'd put my money on that as the culprit. :thumbsup:

[DanDare]

Ooh, was your steak rare? If so how rare? If it was VERY rare I'd put my money on that as the culprit. :thumbsup:

My money is on the bill at the end!;)

[MiniMatt]

Ooh, was your steak rare? If so how rare? If it was VERY rare I'd put my money on that as the culprit. :thumbsup:

About this rare:

http://www.fsl.orst.edu/sdmg/images/world_cow.jpg

... it was still moo'ing :D

My money is on the bill at the end!;)

Your money was on the bill? Damn! I paid too! I think we must have paid them twice :D

[Demonz]

About this rare:

http://www.fsl.orst.edu/sdmg/images/world_cow.jpg




Vgood :smt082

[Pedrosa]

Ooh my poor chap! Is your sphincter left looking rather like a blood orange now?:p

[Captain Nemo]

thanks for sharing.......................

[Bluepete]

Or this?

http://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t48/conker51/439985.jpg

[Spiderman]

Just thought I'd share this with the world. After all, what makes Britain great is undoubtedly humorous ar$e related anecdotes. We may have invented cricket and football but our greatest invention was surely the fart joke. We're also the only nation who still finds it funny.

Let me tell you, ladies and gentlemen, there is nothing, nothing, in this world that can reduce "I am Man, hear me Roar" to a meek snivelling wreck quicker than sitting down and simultaneously suffering an attack of anal incontinence. Of the runny kind.

I only offer thanks to the Lord (I would kneel but I'm scared what might happen) that I'm at home this morning rather than work, that home has both a shower and a washing machine, and that the house now smells of Dettol rather than what it used to smell of.

Any Guantanamo guards reading looking for new ways to "break the will" of the most iron willed slaves (I would call them prisoners, but remember the US won't even classify them as prisoners of war as that would give them too many rights...) - simply feed them laxatives, guaranteed to break a man's resolve in seconds....


PMSL, i love the fact you guys still think you invented those sports rather than nicked them off the natives when you stole their countries from them ;)

Its like the yanks thinking they invented the Antiques Roadshow, lol.

Also i think Canadians must love a good fart joke....how else do you explain Terrence & Philip otherwise?

I'm sure Ping can give us an insight into the canadian/fart joke issue.