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-   -   Women Drivers :-( (http://forums.sv650.org/showthread.php?t=154747)

Gerry 16-07-10 02:05 PM

Women Drivers :-(
 
Let me set the scene OK.

There was I this afternoon blatting down to Swanage, I'd got past the cameras near Blandford and on the back roads cutting through to Wareham.
All’s well with the world and I’m practicing going round the bends a bit faster with each (as you do) http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/images/...s/wink_new.gif
The birds were singing, the sky was blue and I was feeling as perky as a perky person can http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/images/smilies/inlove.gif

OK, so I maybe was full of the joys of spring and not exactly thinking 100% about my fast approaching bends, but I got round them OKish (as you do) http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/images/...s/wink_new.gif

I sped round the left fork off the A31, past the World End pub towards Morden, round the tighter left hander a few hundred yards down the road looking (I thought) a little like a sun drenched yellow Rossi, I’m sure the cows were mooing their admiration as this yellow blur rocketed past them.

A nice half mile straight next (and no cars to get in the way) and the VTwin was singing like a Banchee (not sure what a Banchee is but I’m sure I’ve heard the expression and assume their singing must be loud and nice engine like in a VTwinny sort of way) anyway I digress. This next right hander is tight and has a small lane coming off it that you could use as an escape road if you over cooked it - and no, I didn’t need to OK, !

Approached the bend possibly a little to rapidly what with the sun and the birds etc etc and next thing I see was a little Golfy type car approach my road from the lane the other side of the bend and stop. Now that all sounds OK (well apart from the speed issue thingy) so I hit the brakes hard and said a few words of prayer to the God of Braking, not sure which one he / she is but threw in a few swear words as well just to be safe.
All was OK...

Looked at my (well yellow Rossi’s) line, and then spotted HER - the “Woman Driver” I need to describe her really.
She was mid twenties, fair long hair tied back with a sort of headband thing on and sunglasses perched on the head in a “top totty” way.

Then she did it - she smiled a beautiful smile at me (thank God for dark visors I say) and her whole face lit up looking like a film star.

I did the gentlemanly thing and gave her my best macho nod and then looked at the bend !
In this half second or so of beautiful blondness the bend had moved right in front of me and my “line” had disintegrated into sort of a “curvy sway”.
I looked where I was heading, not where I wanted to go (as you do) and it was a big bank of gravel and a grassy bank.

Oh poo I thought (and nearly did) and I braced myself for some impromptu off roading although only about six inches off or so you understand, even Rossi has done this, I’ve seen him.
Then followed a sort of amusing wobble for about the next thirty yards as I realised that if I just turned right back onto the road I may make my situation worse

To make it more worse, Miss “Daddy bought me my nice little car and I know I’m gorgeous” followed me up the road, no doubt a little less impressed at my yellow devil-beast of a sports bike and my riding skills http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/images/smilies/rlol.gif

So, be warned fellow gentlemen riders “Women Drivers are dangerous” and I recommend any parents of attractive young ladies to only let them out at night or warn them not to smile at “gentlemen of a certain age” as they would be fully responsible (except in a court of law) if said gentlemen came to grief on the road.

Ignore this at your peril !

Gerry

PsychoCannon 16-07-10 02:26 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
:D Guilty of that one but not as hairy by the sounds of it.

For me the worst I had was when I had a very pretty lady pull upto me on an SV at a petrol station once, couldn't help but stare.
she looked at me, then started grinning and I almost fell over, that doesn't normally happen to me.

Then a bloke a pump over also starts staring at me...so I look down and realised i'm pouring petrol all over my tank and the floor #-o, smooth!
Nearly died of embrasment, does that count.

Gerry 16-07-10 03:14 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
Ah... a fellow "smooth operator" eh :-)


Quote:

Originally Posted by PsychoCannon (Post 2321139)
:D Guilty of that one but not as hairy by the sounds of it.

For me the worst I had was when I had a very pretty lady pull upto me on an SV at a petrol station once, couldn't help but stare.
she looked at me, then started grinning and I almost fell over, that doesn't normally happen to me.

Then a bloke a pump over also starts staring at me...so I look down and realised i'm pouring petrol all over my tank and the floor #-o, smooth!
Nearly died of embrasment, does that count.


Razor 16-07-10 03:40 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
she smiled because if one of the mr men rode a bike, it would be a curvy yellow sv

top post writing skillz tho ;)

dizzyblonde 16-07-10 03:46 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
Typical bloke, takes his eyes off the road with lack of concentration, because he goes into neanderthal drool mode, and blames pretty blonde, when really its his fault.


We can't all be troll lookalikes....shame blokes can't see through visors, or they'd all be off the road for staring at too many nice lady riders butts :-)

nice write up non the less.

Gerry 16-07-10 03:47 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Razor (Post 2321187)
she smiled because if one of the mr men rode a bike, it would be a curvy yellow sv ;)

Starting to see my "yellow devil-beast of a bike" in a different light now :(

ophic 16-07-10 03:49 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
I had someone in the back seat of a car flash her bra at me whilst on the motorway the other day near Sheffield. Of course, motorways not having any corners, the effect was vastly reduced to a wave and a thumbs up.

ophic 16-07-10 03:50 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by dizzyblonde (Post 2321190)
We can't all be troll lookalikes....shame blokes can't see through visors, or they'd all be off the road for staring at too many nice lady riders butts :-)

you mean... if i ride with my visor open i'll see lots of nice lady rider's butts? that's gotta be worth some rain in the face :D

Razor 16-07-10 03:51 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Gerry (Post 2321192)
Starting to see my "yellow devil-beast of a bike" in a different light now :(

it's a soft and cuddly bike, people look at a yellow curvy and say, " no bad man would ride a bike like that."

dizzyblonde 16-07-10 03:53 PM

Re: Women Drivers :-(
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by ophic (Post 2321199)
you mean... if i ride with my visor open i'll see lots of nice lady rider's butts? that's gotta be worth some rain in the face :D

I was meaning in the way of its not so easy to tell through a visor as it is a mahhhooosive window when deciding what rider/driver is.

However, if you wish to have rain in your face, it could be going down the lines of a cold shower, in which case you won't be crashing much staring at ladybutts;)


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