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Search: Posts Made By: BanannaMan
Forum: Idle Banter 17-02-19, 04:54 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

i knew it was going to be a bad day.
I rear ended a car this morning...

The driver got out of the other car, and he was a
DWARF!!

He looked up at me and said "I am NOT Happy!"

So I said,...
Forum: Idle Banter 29-10-18, 03:58 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Police came round today and told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes.


Ha! My dogs don't even ride bikes.
Forum: Idle Banter 21-10-18, 04:15 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

The mother in law will be going to the Halloween party as an evil witch.
No word on what costume she's wearing.
Forum: Idle Banter 22-09-18, 10:31 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

I named my two dogs Timex and Rolex.
Now they are watch dogs.
Forum: Idle Banter 09-06-18, 10:51 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Question:
What is Rockin' like a G6?

Answer:
Canada, this weekend!
Forum: Idle Banter 31-12-17, 05:04 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

I lost my watch at a Christmas party.
About an hour later I saw some guy standing on it while he was sexually harassing a woman.
So I went over and punched him in the face breaking his nose.
No...
Forum: Idle Banter 12-09-17, 02:04 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Rumor has it, the real reason Trump hates Mexicans is because he never received any credit for helping write the lyrics to this Cheech Martin song.

(lyrics on screen)

cQq1G6Jnr2c
Forum: Idle Banter 09-09-17, 05:26 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Not a joke but a definitely a good laugh.


http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/41201494/people-like-ryon-are-going-to-shoot-at-hurricane-irma


And now you know how Trump got elected.
Forum: Idle Banter 19-07-17, 09:45 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

If Johnny Cash had been born in Britain....
(Or 'the Who' had been born in Arkansas)




https://youtu.be/6bfPwtUTP4k
Forum: Idle Banter 02-06-17, 03:53 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Before the US Presidential Election last November I fully expected the next 'Leader of the Free World' to be a woman...
And I was right!!!!

...
Forum: Idle Banter 26-03-17, 09:17 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Enjoying music is like eating candy.
The first you need to do is throw away the rapper.
Forum: Idle Banter 14-10-16, 10:28 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Please just tell me this part is true!
Forum: Idle Banter 12-04-16, 09:42 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

I used to date a girl name Alice.
And she lived on a farm. (really)
I always wondered what became of her.


I'm just trying to figure out how you know...
Forum: Idle Banter 07-03-16, 11:04 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

He'd get my vote.



http://i1055.photobucket.com/albums/s507/thebanannaman/JC_zps209rr4ne.jpg
Forum: Idle Banter 15-02-16, 04:44 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Michael McIntyre on American English.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wSw3IWRJa0
Forum: Idle Banter 15-08-15, 05:51 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Energizer Bunny Arrested:
Charged With Battery


No matter how much you push the envelope,
It'll still be stationery


Whoever invented 'knock-knock' jokes
should get a no-bell prize.
Forum: Idle Banter 28-06-15, 06:37 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

http://i1055.photobucket.com/albums/s507/thebanannaman/howIlook_zpswx825myb.jpg
Forum: Idle Banter 10-05-15, 04:15 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CEZlMbwW8AEgOc9.jpg:large
Forum: Idle Banter 30-04-15, 10:27 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Was sitting in the shade on a hot day, sipping a cool drink while watching my girlfriend mow the lawn
when the lady next door peered over the fence and yelled "You ought to be hung!"
So I yelled...
Forum: Idle Banter 26-04-15, 04:30 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Out in space two alien forms are speaking with each other.

The first spaceman says, "The dominant life forms on the earth planet have developed satellite-based weapons."

The second alien, who...
Forum: Idle Banter 18-04-15, 05:46 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Yes,that happens to me all the time.
Feel free to use any of my jokes whenever you need to.







:---)
Forum: Idle Banter 18-04-15, 03:02 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

:rolleyes:
Would you care for some cheese to go with that whine?


Did you know women like a man with a good sense of humor?
Oh wait, you're single aren't you?
Forum: Idle Banter 17-04-15, 12:49 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

If prisoners took pictures of themselves
Would they be called cellphies ???
Forum: Idle Banter 17-04-15, 12:17 AM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

http://i1055.photobucket.com/albums/s507/thebanannaman/android_zpsxfqgy4iy.jpg
Forum: Idle Banter 06-04-15, 02:35 PM
Replies: 1,377
Views: 564,188
Posted By BanannaMan
Re: The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

Sounds like a good reason to give up mowing in the summer.
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