Finally felt brave enough and strong enough to balance the bike last week. Thought the reflexes / concentration had sharpened up enough with the reduction in drugs so here goes.
Teetered out the street, both feet down
crawled down to the T junction and pulled out, almost stalled as i'd forgotten to come down out of 3rd when i stopped, slowly chugged away, sat 80yds back from blue transit at 23mph in a 30 for a mile, road opened out to long sweeping 60 limit, still behind blue transit 47mph, checked out road clear for at least a mile. twisted gingerly on the throttle closing to 15yds on van, infantesimle spot appears on the horizon, nisan micra, easily 1000 yds away. Panic what to do, roll off the throttle, wobble, panic, back on the throttle, 800yds now, panic, back off the throttle drop back behind the van......10, 11, 12 secs micra passes.
Roundabout crawl around perpendicular 15mph, exit crawl along 40 limit 32mph, bike coming other way, lifts hand in friendly gesture, I dont move, no wave, no nod, stairing straight ahead, petrified, roundabout, road, junction, cant find neutral, 1st- 2nd- 1st- 2nd- road clear, chug out, mcdonalds on left. pull in, switch off.
6.1 miles, 20 mins, new land speed record (if i'd walked it) Into McD's for coffee and burger, Thinking back, mirrors never used, no life savers, never out of 3rd, no overtake, no lean, WTF
it cant be this hard, I can do this, whats that expression, "like riding a bike". 40 minutes to get the courage to leave McD's. Straight home, no improvement, only fear, not real fear but irrational fear of nothing, not of crashing, not of some dozy cage hitting me, just fear no rhyme, no reason. Home, safe , parked and locked, standing staring, just want to ride her, why cant I ride her.
So 16 months of sitting in a garage, and all she gets is 12 miles of ****.
Week later, its sunny, dry, take her out and clean her, still sunny, suit up lid on, out of street, 2nd-3rd-4th, junction 2nd, rip out, teeter twist harder 3rd 58 **** 30 limit
roll off, 28 coast out, 60 limit twist hear the wind car ahead, 4th twist harder car behind, mirrors, life savers, twist, roll off, lean in twist brake pass, twist , pull in 50 miles done, not well but done, no incidents however no enjoyment just functional, so at least the mechanics are there, muscle memory, I can actually sit on her and travel, no enjoyment - no fear either only trepidation, well maybe some fear.
Yesterday, took her to saltire for a check up and book the 7.5k service, b roads/ a roads/ motorway/ city centre, traffic lights/ busy/ filtering, there and back, no issues, no enjoyment, no confidence but no fear
Shes fine needs a service and new tyres (Diablo Stradas), booked in for 1st July, but she needs another 1000 miles on the clock before then.
So I'm back on the bike and back on the forum, back in the land of the living, not enjoying it yet but I will! 1000 miles to do in 10 days, no problem, might even enjoy some of them.