[Seeker]

Firstly, I need to inform you that I'm anti-social, not extremely so, but enough that I avoid crowds. Therefore, I would normally shop at Tescos at 6am and tolerate the 5 or 6 other customers. I use the local Tesco because it's close (just over 1 mile) and big, it is usually open 24 hours.

Imagine my horror when I arrived at 8am (Tesco's new opening time) and I discovered that the queue to get in the store stretched the length of the frontage, turned 90° and went the length of the building's side, U-turned and came half-way back again. I've been in shorter queues in Disneyland.

You were held 6ft back from the nearest person in the queue so socialising wasn't possible (assuming you even wanted to do so), my desire to live was wilting by this point.

Eventually I was allowed in and the ballet started - trying to get what you wanted whilst avoiding other shoppers and the pick-and-clickers was the closest thing to participating in Strictly come Dancing than I needed.

The product range was reduced as were some of the offers of "buy 2 for reduced price" - shelves were pretty full although the bananas had been plundered noticeably.

Tannoy messages informed you not to browse (what? why would you do that, don't you have a list?)

So, thinking I'd bought what I needed I headed for a checkout - nope - you now head for the alcohol (appropriately) at the far end of the store to join the queue to pay. Once ensconced in the leaving queue, I realised what I'd forgotten and was faced with the dilemma of leaving the queue and rejoining the mad hordes or abandoning the idea. Checking the queue length behind me, I chose the latter.

I spent about 3 times what I normally would because I never want to shop again.