Heartbroken

I got home today to find my girlfriend sat with a big white bag of my stuff. She broke up with me, telling me she'd been feeling off for a while and it's because she doesn't love me any more.

I'm in pieces. She's the only person I've ever been able to see a future with, and I'm so in love with her. I couldn't even be angry with her.

How do you get through this? I feel like I'm dying. Breakups have never done this to me before.

[Spiderman]

Ouch, mate thats hard.

How long you guys been together?

It does get easier... and guess what, its ou old friend called Time that works the magic.

But first off, you gotta try find out why and see if you cant win her back mate.

[DarrenSV650S]

Ouch, that's harsh. Sorry to hear that mate, but like spidey says it could turn around. I've no idea how you get over it, so can't really help you

sorry to hear that dude

Did she say why she wanted the relationship to end? I know you said she doesnt love you anymore but was there anything else? How long have you been together?

Unfortunately there is no quick fix..but if you guys are truly meant to be together then you will be. Perhaps some time and space apart will make her realise what she is missing.

Although it is painful, time is a great healer.

Maria

[skeetly]

Argh.
Hang in there buddy.

Communication is the key. If you are going to try and win her back, don't bombard with Why? Try and find out what she is feeling "off" about and if it's anything you can amend.

Heartache is never easy. Avoid getting drunk and phoning her in desperation, although that's how you may feel.

Can you think of anything that has changed for you guys?

All the best x

[fizzwheel]

Being dumped sucks big hairy donkey b*lls...

Give her space, dont bombard her with phone calls and texts etc etc, just let her have some time to herself then get back in contact with her, ask to talk and see how she is feeling then.

It might be rescuable, depending on how you both feel after talking.

Sometimes its just better to let it go and go your seperate ways though and save yourself further pain and heartbreak. But if you do decide to go, then make a clean break of it.

As to how to get over it, well it takes time. Theres no special trick or thing you can do. Go out with your mates, go to the pub, get drunk, Dont sit indoors feeling sorry for yourself. Just do something, do anything at all.

I found reading books helped me. Playing my guitar also helped. Going out on the bike works to, as long as you are in the right state of mind and at the mo you might not be. Write her a letter, be honest and tell her how you feel. The put the letter away and dont send it to her, It'll help you get your thoughts straight, or it did for me anyway.

Its not easy, we've all been there, hang on and you'll come out of it a stronger person. One particular split broke my heart completely, but it made me realise eventually that being dumped isnt the end of the world and if I could deal with that I could deal with anything.

Sometimes these things have a habbit of working out for the best even if we dont realise that till much later on.

[Spikenipple]

Sorry to hear that Neeja! Bad times indeed. A short term solution for this evening is ring up a couple of mates, go down the pub and get a few (read: lots of) stiff drinks and have a good old chat to them about it. How long were you together for?

Neeja i`m so very sorry for you.... it hurts so much and there`s no way to help you through this.

My advice is to do absolutely nothing. As hard as it is and as tempting as it is DON`T ring her, DON`T text her, DON`T email her and DON`T try and arrange to see her. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder but you have to give her time to miss you.

If you`re constantly contacting her you`ll potentially drive her away and it won`t give her time to miss you. Far better is to have her wondering why you haven`t contacted her and to wonder what you`re doing and if you`re missing her etc.

Time apart will give you both time to consider your future and to decide in your case if you still want this relationship and in her case to decide if she`s made a mistake. Don`t be tempted to think "but I need to let her know how much I want her and that I still love her"..... if she misses you and if she cares she will contact you and you can then tell her that the reason you`ve stayed away is because you respect her decision to split up and that you`ve hoped that staying away will give her time to consider if she`s done the right thing or not.

Very best of luck and if this is meant to be it really will be... x

[Spiderman]

Originally Posted by Speedy Claire

My advice is to do absolutely nothing. As hard as it is and as tempting as it is DON`T ring her, DON`T text her, DON`T email her and DON`T try and arrange to see her. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder but you have to give her time to miss you.

Not that i'm disagreeing with you Claire but this just goes to prove what a fickle mind you women have. I tried this with an ex and you know what...she said the fact that i didnt try and win her back right away showed just how little i cared for her and how i should have been going out my way to try and sort thing out not just "ignoring" her.

the fact that i could do nothing but think about her and what do to make things right again was, to her, just what someone who didnt care would say!
You girls eh? lol.

C'mon Neeja old fella, were here for ya but you need to tell us more to give you more advice. Problem shared and all that you know mate.