Understanding women - SV650.org

04-05-06, 09:04 AM

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

40-ish................................49.
Adventurous.....................Slept with everyone.
Athletic...............................No breasts.
Average looking....................Moooo.
Beautiful...........................Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure................On medication.
Feminist................................Fat.
Free spirit............................Junkie..
Friendship first......................Former slut.
New-Age.............Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned.......................No BJs.
Open-minded.......................Desperate.
Outgoing..........................Loud and Embarrassing.
Professional..........................Bitch.
Voluptuous..........................Very Fat.
Large frame.........................Hugely Fat.
Wants Soul mate..................Stalker Bubbly personality...............carrying a few extra pounds.

WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = You're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = You better not
8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later 9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron!
10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

MEN'S ENGLISH:
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = Let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.

04-05-06, 09:11 AM

04-05-06, 09:11 AM

So true

04-05-06, 09:15 AM

thanks for the tip-off, I was just about to reply to a personals ad that very closely matches your post

Skip · 04-05-06, 10:03 AM

Soooo true!

tinpants · 04-05-06, 10:06 AM

Brilliant!!

Spiderman · 04-05-06, 10:31 AM

and who said men were difficult to figure out???

04-05-06, 10:32 AM

Just wait for the women brigade to spot this and we'll be in serious trouble...

04-05-06, 01:53 PM

I'd say we're more bored with you 'men' regurgitating the same load of tripe, day in, day out....

Biker Biggles · 04-05-06, 01:55 PM

Ping----You missed out the opening line---"We need to talk"

04-05-06, 09:04 AM	#1
cuffy Guest Posts: n/a	Understanding women DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS: 40-ish................................49. Adventurous.....................Slept with everyone. Athletic...............................No breasts. Average looking....................Moooo. Beautiful...........................Pathological liar. Emotionally Secure................On medication. Feminist................................Fat. Free spirit............................Junkie.. Friendship first......................Former slut. New-Age.............Body hair in the wrong places. Old-fashioned.......................No BJs. Open-minded.......................Desperate. Outgoing..........................Loud and Embarrassing. Professional..........................Bitch. Voluptuous..........................Very Fat. Large frame.........................Hugely Fat. Wants Soul mate..................Stalker Bubbly personality...............carrying a few extra pounds. WOMEN'S ENGLISH: 1. Yes = No 2. No = Yes 3. Maybe = No 4. We need = I want 5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry 6. We need to talk = You're in trouble 7. Sure, go ahead = You better not 8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later 9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron! 10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about? MEN'S ENGLISH: 1. I am hungry = I am hungry 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy 3. I am tired = I am tired 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage! 5. I love you = Let's have sex now 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex? 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you. 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you. 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you. 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.

04-05-06, 10:03 AM	#5
Skip Member Mega Poster Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Norfolk Posts: 3,151	Soooo true! __________________ '81 Honda H100A '18 Honda MSX125 (Grom)

04-05-06, 10:06 AM	#6
tinpants Ubique Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Forest of Dean, Gloucestershire Posts: 643	Brilliant!! __________________ Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you're a pillock

04-05-06, 10:31 AM	#7
Spiderman Where the hell am I? Mega Poster Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Swingin' thru the urban jungle Posts: 7,451	and who said men were difficult to figure out??? __________________ . "Computers are great! Not for communicating tho. They have one fundamental flaw ... they don't have eyebrows." AlpineCarStereo: you win ....... eeerrr ..... ummm ..... my undying support of you, the greatest Mod this forum has ever known. My Leige. davepreston: i bow to your modding godliness. vixis: He's this really cute Persian tea-boy, Im so not giving you his number :P

04-05-06, 01:55 PM	#10
Biker Biggles Member Mega Poster Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Barnet Herts Posts: 5,071	Ping----You missed out the opening line---"We need to talk" __________________ On a clear day we stand there and look further than the ordinary eye can see.

04-05-06, 09:15 AM	#4
Terence Guest Posts: n/a	thanks for the tip-off, I was just about to reply to a personals ad that very closely matches your post

04-05-06, 10:32 AM	#8
Filipe M. Guest Posts: n/a	Just wait for the women brigade to spot this and we'll be in serious trouble...

04-05-06, 01:53 PM	#9
Ping Guest Posts: n/a	I'd say we're more bored with you 'men' regurgitating the same load of tripe, day in, day out....

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