What would you do?

In the last four weeks I've been involved in a couple of incidents that have been really bugging me.

First incident happened as I was riding home from work one evening. I came upon the scene of an accident. Must have only happened within the last few minutes, as there were no paramedics, police etc. There was a crowd of people gathered around, just watching and traffic was crossing over the debris, without any hesitation at all. There were two women standing next to the car that had been involved in the accident, ( I didn't notice any other vehicle), both on their mobiles( I assume calling for help).

From where I was, I noticed a figure slumped in the drivers seat. No one seemed to be doing anything about this, so I stopped to help. To cut a long story short, the woman in the car will live. The paramedics, police and fire services arrived within ten minutes, at which point I stepped back, got on my bike and rode away.

The following morning, I was discussing the incident with work colleagues and ALL of them said they wouldn't get involved. In fact, one of them hadn't been too far behind me and when she realised there'd been an accident, turned her car round and took a different route!! The reasons my colleagues gave for not wanting to be involved is that you get no thanks, and sometimes victims can be violent.

OK. I can almost understand it if someone with no medical training whatsoever walks away from an accident, but for someone in the profession, to come out with such rubbish, really shocked me. One of my colleagues said she never wore her uniform in public so if she were to come across an accident, she could just walk away and no one would expect her to help.

I wasn't in uniform, so technically, I could have just rode past, but I'd never be able to live with myself. So what, if you don't get a 'thank you'. In my opinion, its about helping another human being in need. Stopping to help could mean the difference between life and death and even if someone has no first aid training, just holding someones hand and talking to them is better than not getting involved!!

If the professionals are reluctant to get involved, what hope is there for the rest? And how can anyone just stand around and gawp. I guess its human curiosity, but I think if you can't offer any assistance then just move on. I'd like to think, if I were ever involved in a road accident, someone would stop and help me, rather than stand around and watch me, possibly die!!

Second incident happened in my local bank as I was patiently waiting my turn in a queue. One of the bank tellers became free and I was next in line. Before I could even take a step forward, a man jumped the queue from behind me and went up to the counter. I went up to him, and politely pointed out that he'd jumped the queue. The man opened his mouth, and out spewed the most vile racial profanity I've EVER heard.

I was so shocked and so not expecting such a reaction, I burst into tears right there!! In hindsight, I'm furious with myself for giving the moron the satisfaction of knowing that he'd upset me. But what gets me most is that no one did or said anything at all, through out this whole tirade!! Not only did the teller continue to serve this man, but another teller became free and called out to me. I went across to her and all she said was " Hiya love. What can we do for you today?"!!!!! So I was being served (sobbing uncontrollably), and the moron was being served and still nothing was said or done.

I didn't expect members of the public in the bank to step in. The man was behaving quite agressively, so I can understand their reluctance, but surely the bank staff could have done something?! Like refuse to serve the man? The man left the bank first, all the while having a go at me. When my transaction was complete, the teller said to me, " sorry about that love. Have a good day." And that was the end of that.

When I left the bank, I was petrified the moron might be waiting for me, I stood outside the door for a good while before I felt it was safe to leave. Thankfully, he wasn't.

So both these incidents have been bugging me. I realise that nowadays people are very hesitant about getting involved, but surely there are times when one just has to??

Right, I'm off to do some deep breathing exercises now...

[G]

It sums this country up to a tee really.

Incident 1 - Everybody probably assumes somebody is more capable or already doing something to help so dont bother.

There is sometimes horrific accidents outside my work and the firstaiders are alway out the instantly helping, I however have very little knowledge and would avoid getting involved.

A major problem aswell is the blame culture, it was in the paper only yesterday that an individual had helped clean a child up after falling off her bike, the wound became infected and scarred badly, the family are now trying to sue the passerby who stopped to help there kid.

Incident 2 - Completely unforgivable, I for one would not stand by and let someone talk to another person in that way regardless of how aggressive they are being, although I'm fortunate enough to beable to look after myself and fend off most type of attack. Again I can appreciate why most people would just not get involved though in this day and age, when alot of rogues are carrying around dirty needles and knifes etc.

I saw a bike crash last week. The bike was 3 vehicles in front of me. The people in the two cars in front of me just sat in their cars and did nothing. I got out of my car and ran over to the motorcyclist to see if he was ok (he was). The only other person to get out of their car was the driver of a car (coming from the other direction) that the motorbike hit who helped the guy move his bike off the road.

When I was involved in a bike crash a few months ago several people stopped to help and one woman (a midwife) sat with me until I got in the ambulance. I was so grateful.

Hi melody you did right stopping at the accident I would have done the same! I'm a quallified first aider. I did the training for one reason so I could help someone or make a differance between life and death!
On the bank incident I would go to the police and report it as they take racism very seriously! make sure you give them the exact time of the incident so they can look at the banks cctv footage! Don't let him get away with it!

BILLY

Right, incident one, I would have done the same as you, even if it was just holding someones hand to give a bit of reassurance to that person, well done.
Incident two, I wish I had been there, Id have flattened the *******, no questions asked

Keep your chin up mate

[G]

I know the bank my partner works at had a similar incident, they closed the abusive womens accounts down and posted her the cheques.

Both situations just go to show how people can become so wrapped up in their own little selfish worlds with no care for anyone else whatsoever.

The first scenario is truly disgusting. I've been the first on scene at a few accidents and never once thought about how the 'victim' may react - they're hardly going to get violent if they're dying FFS. I remember a few years ago when I found a car upside down in a ditch, the driver was only 18 and she was screaming so much because she was trapped it was terrifying. With the help of another driver we managed to get the door open and cut her belt to get her out and fortunately for her (and us) she was just a bit shook up and a few bruises here and there. For all I knew she could have been dead when I was running over to the car and it was very scary, but I couldn't imagine just driving off. I mean, by the time the police and her parents had turned up and I'd got back in the van to go home I'd only 'lost' 1/2 to 3/4 hour of time so it wasn't even a big deal time-wise. I like to think that if it was my wife or daughter in that situation someone else would have done the same. And no, I didn't get a thank-you but I wasn't doing it for the thanks/glory/reward/whatever and wasn't expecting one - perhaps you're colleagues are only willing to help if they're going to benefit


Situation 2 strikes me of lack of tact, compassion and possibly also training. I can see why members of the public do not want to get involved in conflict and confrontation nowadays but the response of 'have a good day' is just unprofessional by the numpties behind the counter. There is no excuse for racist behaviour and I hope the t**t gets his bad karma soon.

Incident 1 - you did the right thing, and it's a sad indictment of our society that so few people will stop and help in a situation like that. I'm one of few people who'll stop and help anyone in need if I can.

A few years ago I stopped on the hard shoulder of the M1 to offer assistance to a vehicle broken down (in fact it had a flat tyre). I approached the vehicle and the female locked inside it refused to even crack the window open to speak to me, and just looked scared. I ended up leaving the scene because she wouldn't talk to me or let me help.

Incident 2 - Report it to the police straight away, write a letter of complaint to the bank about the conduct of their staff and also report the incident to the bank too - the bank will have CCTV so will be able to ID the culprit, and the police can get his details and prosecute him for threatening behaviour or even inciting racially-motivated hatred.

[the_lone_wolf]

the bank knows what time you used the cashiers desk

the person before you was the offender

a + b = the bank knows his name / address / everything

the police should be able to obtain the details with relatively little hassle, i would follow it up, there's no excuse for that kind of behaviour even without the additional rasicm

[SoulKiss]

Situation 1.

Dont know a whole lot of 1st aid, its been years since I had any training, but I know that what I know is better than nothing, even if its just to assess that the person doesn't need to be moved due to ongoing danger, and to stop others trying to move them.

Situation 2.

Having worked in a Bank, and on tills in Shops, I personally would have told the person pushing in to get to the end of the queue - I have actually done that. In your position I would have asked to speak to the branch manager and made a complaint that the teller had not acted in that way.

Anyways, as you know, not everyone out there is a selfish git, so have a HUG and hope you feel better