WOMEN - The rules during the World Cup! - SV650.org

26-04-06, 08:52 AM

1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations.

If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.

2. During the World Cup, the television is ours, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye).

3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.

4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell from the second floor... It won’t happen.

5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to watch the matches. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.

6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, its only a game", or "don't worry, they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce.

7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one" game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together".

8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.

9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:

a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.

10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.

11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch??", the reply will be: "Refer to Rule No. 2 of this list".

12. Finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, etc etc.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Regards,

Men of the World

26-04-06, 08:54 AM

26-04-06, 09:08 AM

Nowt but the truth there! I shall be posting these rules on my kitchen fridge tonight and see what the outcome will be! Watch this space!

26-04-06, 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ward8124

Nowt but the truth there! I shall be posting these rules on my kitchen fridge tonight and see what the outcome will be! Watch this space!

Probably

26-04-06, 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cloggsy

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ward8124

Nowt but the truth there! I shall be posting these rules on my kitchen fridge tonight and see what the outcome will be! Watch this space!

Probably

But it will be worth it! Pity there wasnt a smiley hold his nuts in pain as i reckon this would be more appropriate!

26-04-06, 09:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ward8124

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cloggsy

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ward8124

Nowt but the truth there! I shall be posting these rules on my kitchen fridge tonight and see what the outcome will be! Watch this space!

Probably

But it will be worth it! Pity there wasnt a smiley hold his nuts in pain as i reckon this would be more appropriate!

I think The Mass could do with that one too.

26-04-06, 09:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flamin_Squirrel

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ward8124

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cloggsy

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ward8124

Nowt but the truth there! I shall be posting these rules on my kitchen fridge tonight and see what the outcome will be! Watch this space!

Probably

But it will be worth it! Pity there wasnt a smiley hold his nuts in pain as i reckon this would be more appropriate!

I think The Mass could do with that one too.

O really do tell i think i may have missed that story!

Edit dont bother just read the post! OWWWWWWWW!!!!

26-04-06, 10:21 AM

Men.

26-04-06, 10:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NuttyT@rt

Men.

Agreed. :P

tinpants · 26-04-06, 10:28 AM

Wimmin! Humph!!!!!!!!!

You just don't get it do you??? Even when the nice Mr Cloggs explains it for you.

Theres just no helping some people

26-04-06, 08:52 AM	#1
Cloggsy Guest Posts: n/a	WOMEN - The rules during the World Cup! 1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention. 2. During the World Cup, the television is ours, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye). 3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month. 4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell from the second floor... It won’t happen. 5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to watch the matches. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day. 6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, its only a game", or "don't worry, they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce. 7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one" game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together". 8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times. 9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because: a) I will not go, b) I will not go, and c) I will not go. 10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash. 11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch??", the reply will be: "Refer to Rule No. 2 of this list". 12. Finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, etc etc. Thank you for your cooperation. Regards, Men of the World

26-04-06, 10:28 AM	#10
tinpants Ubique Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Forest of Dean, Gloucestershire Posts: 643	Wimmin! Humph!!!!!!!!! You just don't get it do you??? Even when the nice Mr Cloggs explains it for you. Theres just no helping some people Top post mate. __________________ Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you're a pillock

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26-04-06, 09:08 AM	#3
Ward8124 Guest Posts: n/a	Nowt but the truth there! I shall be posting these rules on my kitchen fridge tonight and see what the outcome will be! Watch this space!