The Comedy Club - Post Your Jokes Here

LOL like that one

I was having trouble with my computer and, despite my best efforts, I
couldn't find the problem

In the end I called on Richard, the 11 year old lad who lives next
door to us and whose bedroom looks very much like Mission Control,
Houston (during an Apollo launch), and I asked him whether he would
come over and have a look at my computer for me.

He came, looked, clicked a couple of buttons and then, whey-hey!,
instantly solved the problem and I was up and running again.

Well, I obviously thanked him, slipped a couple of quid into his hand
and then, just as he was walking away, I called him back and asked him
exactly what the problem was and (he had been far too fast with the
keyboard for me to see what he was doing) how he had cured it so
quickly.

Rich grinned and told me that it was a *one D ten T* error.

Not wanting to appear totally stupid, but being very inquisitive
nevertheless, I still wanted a more precise description of the *fault*
he had found so quickly - and then instantly cured.

'OK,' I said (at this point I was still trying to appear totally
knowledgeable of *most* things - apart, that is, from this silly
little - but frustrating - glitch), a 'one D ten T error' ... I paused
for a moment and then , rather less confidently now, followed it up
with: 'Well, what's that then?'

For the first time he looked up and grinned at me, 'Haven't you ever
heard of an 'one D ten T error' before?'

No,' I replied, rather slowly, 'I really don't remember that one at all.'

'Write it down.' he said, vaguely impishly, 'And use capital letters -
I think even you will eventually figure it out.'

So I did just that, I wrote down......

<1 D 1 0 T>

And to think that, once upon a time, I even used to like the little ***t.

LOL Hahaha nice one.


 
A Christmas Story for people having a bad day: 


When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.


Then Mrs Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.



Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.

Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drank all the cider and hidden the liquor.

In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.



Just then the doorbell rang, and irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. 
The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'



And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

Originally Posted by Lozzo

<1 D 1 0 T>

We call them PEBCAKs.

Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard.

What does Snoop Dogg wash his underwear with?



Bleeeee-atch (said like biaaaatch)

Yeah ok, it's cr@p, someone told me it this eve

^ I love that one.

Oh how the wiggas at college are gonna love me on monday.

what time does Andy Murray go to bed?

tennish

four fonts walk into a bar. barman says "get out, we dont want your type in here....."

[DarrenSV650S]

shudnt make me laugh but it does