SV650.org - SV650 & Gladius 650 Forum



Idle Banter For non SV and non bike related chat (and the odd bit of humour - but if any post isn't suitable it'll get deleted real quick).
There's also a "U" rating so please respect this. Newbies can also say "hello" here too.

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 10-09-10, 01:01 PM   #1
slark01
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Smile So what's your best Put Down?

Here is a few :
I'll never forget the first time we met -- although I'll keep trying.
I would ask you how old you are, but I know you can't count that high.
You are pretty as a picture and we'd love to hang you.
Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?
Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?
He is living proof that man can live without a brain!
Keep talking. I always yawn when I'm interested.
You are a couplet short of a sonnet.
A mud pack is good for the complexion. I suggest you leave it on.
All day I thought of you...I was at the zoo.
All of your ancestors must number in the millions...It's hard to believe that many people are to blame for producing you.
All that you are you owe to your parents. Why don't you send them a penny and square the account?
Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice.
Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today?
Are your parents siblings?
As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
Brains aren't everything. In fact in your case they're nothing.
Can I borrow your head for my rock garden?
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to the stupid people.
Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to like you?
Don't let your mind wander - it're far too small to be let out on its own.
Don't you need a license to be that ugly?
Don't you realize that there are enough people to hate in the world already without your working so hard to give us another?
Dont be ignorant all your life. Take a day off, why don't you?
Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?
Hi there, I'm a human being! What are you?
How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?
I can see why you are often lost in thought - it's an unfamiliar territory.
I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
I don't think you are a fool. But then, what's my own humble opinion against thousands of others?
I fart to make you smell better.
I guess you prove that even God makes mistakes sometimes.
I hear that when your mother first saw you, she decided to leave you on the front steps of a police station while she turned herself in.
Kindness to animals is really important...So please give that face back to the gorilla.
I hear you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?
I heard that when you were born, your father threw rocks at the stork.
I heard that you went to the haunted house and they offered you a job.
I heard your parents took you to a dog show and you won.
I love what you've done with your hair. How did you get it to come out of one nostril like that?
I may be fat but you are ugly, and I can lose weight.
I refuse to engage in a battle of wits, as I will not take advantage of the handicapped.
I think Mother Nature really hates you because you remind her so much of all her mistakes!
I would love to beat you up, but I have a problem with cruelty to dumb animals.
I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ***.
I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
I've had many cases of love that were just infatuation, but this hate I feel for you is the real thing.
If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on earth.
If we were to kill everybody who hates you, it wouldn't be murder; it would be mass nuclear annihilation.
Is that your face--or are you breaking it in for a bulldog?
Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you be yourself.
Look, don't go to a mind reader; go to a palm reader; I know you've got a palm.
Looking at you, I realize what a waste of skin you are.
No, a polygon is not a dead parrot.
Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
People can't say that you have absolutely nothing! After all, you have inferiority!
People have every right to be ugly, but you abuse the privilege!
Save your breath...You'll need it to blow up your date.
So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.
Sure, I've seen people like you before - but I had to pay an admission...
The last time I saw a face like yours I threw it a fish!
The thing that terrifies me the most is that someone might hate me as much as I loathe you.
There was something about you that I liked, but you spent it.
They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured.
The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.
We all spring from apes, but you didn't spring far enough.
We heard that when you ran away from home your folks sent you a note saying, "Do not come home and all will be forgiven".
We know that you would go to the end of the world for us. But would you stay there?
We know that you would give your life for us. Promise!
We know you could not live without us. We'll pay for the funeral.
When I want your opinion, I'll rattle your cage!
When you get to the men's room, you will see a sign that says, "Gentlemen." Pay no heed to it. Go right on in.
The zoo called. The babboons want their butts back, so you'll have to find a new face.
When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price?
Would you like to replace my business partner who died this morning? I'll arrange it with the undertaker.
You are not the worst person in the world, but until one worse comes along, you'll do.
You are so old, the candles on your birthday cake raised earths temperature by 3 degrees.
You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you.
You have the intelligence of a bucket of rocks.
You have the warm personal charm of a millipede.
You know, I do understand you. I have a way with dumb animals.
You must have gotten up on the wrong side of the cage this morning.
Your face is a waste of molecules.


Ste.
  Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 01:07 PM   #2
timwilky
Member
Mega Poster
 
timwilky's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Not in Yorkshire. (Thank God)
Posts: 4,116
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

I used to have a work colleague who was fit as an egg and twice as runny.

We were all out in Manc chester one night, when somebody made the comment, what do they have to do to get in her knickers. Quick as flash she said

Sorry there is only room for one c*** in there. And turned round to me as he went red and limped off into the background saying.

I have been waiting 10 years to use that line.

I have been known to use
Were you born stupid, or does it come naturally?"
__________________
Not Grumpy, opinionated.

Last edited by timwilky; 10-09-10 at 01:09 PM.
timwilky is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 01:13 PM   #3
Viney
Member
Mega Poster
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: In the shadows to the left
Posts: 7,700
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

I have whey too many and are all relevent at the time.
Viney is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 01:17 PM   #4
454697819
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

I use in mid flow..." excuse me, are you still talking"
  Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 01:28 PM   #5
Paul the 6th
Member
Mega Poster
 
Paul the 6th's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 4,790
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

"I don't care what they say about you mate, I think you're alright"

or

"You know what I like about you mate, you're not afraid to make yourself look stupid in public"....
__________________
RIP Reeder 20/07/1988 - 21/03/2012 - You were awesome

Cbf600, sv650, sv1000, gsxr 750 srad, KTM adventure 950, gsxr 750 k1, gsxr 750 srad, fazer 1000, zx9r ninja..
Paul the 6th is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 01:36 PM   #6
CheGuevara
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 478
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

If chatting up a girl in a bar, and she's a bit snotty while shooting you down:

"I may not be the best looking guy in this place, but I'm the only one talking to you."

To embarrass the guy at the urinal next to you:

"Hey that's like a p3nis only smaller!" (Warning: Best used on a mate so he doesn't try and knock you out. Actually checking out the goods is neither required nor recommended.)

Best backhanded compliment after a group ride:

"Wow you were really flying when I passed you!"
__________________
- K9 SV650S: Hel brake lines, carbon end can
- SZR660: The project...
- K5 SV650S: K7 GSXR750 front end, ZX6RR shock, GB Moto rearsets, Hel brake lines, Renthal risers, Tuono bars, V-Rod headlamp, "JMV" belly pan ~SOLD~ (wonder where it is now)

Last edited by CheGuevara; 10-09-10 at 01:38 PM.
CheGuevara is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 01:38 PM   #7
the_lone_wolf
Captain Awesome
Mega Poster
 
the_lone_wolf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Hamble
Posts: 4,266
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

__________________
Official "Dumbass of the Year" 2011
(•_•)
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)
Deal with it...
the_lone_wolf is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 01:41 PM   #8
davepreston
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

ever heard of a oxymoron ,its you breathing
its simple less eating more moving
your parents must have been retards cos your special
*click fingers in thier face* "and sleep"
  Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 02:54 PM   #9
Owenski
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

F**k off before I get drunk enough to consider ruining both our nights.
  Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-10, 03:03 PM   #10
Paul the 6th
Member
Mega Poster
 
Paul the 6th's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 4,790
Default Re: So what's your best Put Down?

How about a lovely cup of f*** off?
__________________
RIP Reeder 20/07/1988 - 21/03/2012 - You were awesome

Cbf600, sv650, sv1000, gsxr 750 srad, KTM adventure 950, gsxr 750 k1, gsxr 750 srad, fazer 1000, zx9r ninja..
Paul the 6th is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 12:46 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® - Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.