Elderly parents

Sometimes I despair at the treatment and lack of consideration for the familys concerned.
Example--My father was taken into hospital on Monday night and I was only informed this afternoon,I won't go into detail but my biggest problem being he is in Lancs and me in Essex,not exactly local.
I will add that in one of his more lucid moments it is at his wish that he remains in the home of his choice,which was just round the corner from where he lived.
Unfortunately the ageing process is something we can't stop but I hope I never become such a heartbreak to my kids.
We can only regard their wants and needs and do the best we can for them.

[Luckypants]

My sympathies. I know how this must feel, we are in a similar (but not so serious) position.

In a way it is like having children again, no disrespect as I too have elderly parents. You can only do what you feel is best for them, and at some point it may not be what they feel is best for them.

A lot of people take advantage or disrespect the elderly, maybe they do not realise that they too one day will be elderly.

My mother is 85, and crumbling. My daughter is 10, and just a bit on the lively side.

I read a fabulous line in a book (can't remember which - an Aga saga I think it was) - 'we are caught between the needs of the very young and the very old.' It was even worse 5 years ago, Sophie has grown up a bit now.

Originally Posted by Ed

My mother is 85, and crumbling. My daughter is 10, and just a bit on the lively side.

I meant they need looking after and help with looking at there future.

When you are younger you spend your time looking after your kids,when you are older
you spend time looking after your elderly parents AND GRANDKIDS
Who says life gets easier as you get into the twilight years when you should be able to enjoy life to the full------------I think its hard work
I may give up this retirement lark and go back to work as life was much more relaxing

Originally Posted by Dangerous Dave

A lot of people take advantage or disrespect the elderly, maybe they do not realise that they too one day will be elderly.

I like having a conversation with older people. I used to work in a care home for ex-military folk with sight loss (St Dunstans near brighton), and the stories where great to hear; heart breaking, but great stories from the war. One guy was a japanese prisoner of war, they did all sorts of stuff to him (torture) and he's not been phased by it. Was the nicest fellow I met there, I always saw him out for his walks when I got to work so I used to walk back with him. There was another guy who used to do speedway riding as a past-time from his military duties.

I respect older people, they've probably had less privelages and less aids to help them through life (least, the ones I've met havn't had as good life as I've been blessed with), and I feel strongly for those who faught in the wars to give me the freedom I have now

My parents mean alot to me, and I'm scared of watching them get old. At the moment, they are ok (mum's eyes arnt as great so she has varifocals) and my dad seems in good health. But I know it'll be a sad day when my dad decides to hang up his leathers for good (i'll take his bike off him though and cherish it...hopefully he'll not end his biking days owning something too practical....) and when my mum starts needing help in the kitchen (she never wants help in the kitchen lol)

I'll only have one getting old - My Dad's 70 next year and picking up his leathers for the first time in about 25 years and its all my fault.
and i'm glad we didn't have to nurse my through the worse

and my mum lived by two rules - if you aren't embarassing your children you ain't living life to the full
and never forget that your children will choose your nursing home!