Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

I don't know if this has been done before but I thought I'd give it a go.

Rules: Up to three sentences and no-one is allowed to end it. There MUST only be story text written in here. Here goes.

Once upon a time there was a little beaver called Norris. Norris was a happy go lucky sort of beaver who enjoyed many things in life. One day he was tending his dam when he heard something he had never heard before.....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

It sounded like a loud wailing and was coming from woods. Norris went to investigate and when he reached the source of the noise, he discovered a rather sexy female beaver tied to a tree. She was......

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

Wearing a Black PVC Gimp Mask , and had forgotten the secret word to get her released from the tree , She looked at Norris and said .....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

Get out of here quick, the U-Rating Bomb is about to go off !!!!

Or at least, if she hadnt been gagged thats that is, instead, all he heard was "MM MM M MM MMM, MM MMMMM, MMM M MM M M MM!!!!"

Unfortunately for Norris, her warning was too late, and as the explosion ripped him apart, he wished that he hadn't had such a thing for female beavers in PVC and Gimp masks.

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

As Norris and Sheilas (for 'twas her name) blo0dy remains rained down on the forest Farquar the Cougar strolled into the gore splattered clearing. He looked around eyeing up the lumps of tasty looking meat and...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

was suddenly set upon by a lusty pirate swinging his cutlass wildly. The cougar stood no chance and ran as fast as the wind. The Pirate meanwhile buckled his swash and...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

...spliced his mainbrace. He remembered Norris from the good old days when they were both students who had worked at the local Lidls together for at least three and a half weeks. Who could have inflicted such a horrible death on Norris and Sheila? (Who was very well known thoughout the forest). Intent on revenge Stingpants the pilates teacher set off....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

in the direction of the setting sun. Soon, all around in the woods it would be dark; and when it gets dark the woods get a bit creepy. Stingpants trod on a twig which made a loud 'crack!' and there was a bright burst of light in front of her....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

...through which stepped Dawn (think about it). Dawn was a fine buxom wench with long tresses of flaxen coloured hair. She would regularly pump the cabin boy's spectacular...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentences and pass it on
 

....bilge until she could take it any more. Dawn spoke with a deep husky voice, rather like Kath Beale but with an old German accent; "What bringeth thou to meine luvlig forest ya?". Stingopants replied....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

" Oh fine buxom wench, I come hither to avenge the death of my dear friend. However, your mesmerising beauty behoves me to. . .

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...ask for your hand in marraige.

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

'You've got to be joking, Mate' Dawn replied, losing her phony german accent rapidly.'You might have a big cutlass, but I want a man with a big...........'

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

'Nicht dis is verboten' said Dawn 'you must go on a perrilous quest into the centre of the forest where.......

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

the zombie undead corpses of Norris and Sheila walk......

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

You will find Terry, King of the Gimp people and his trusty friend Goatse. From there you must learn the fabled great skill of Concertina and play for us my favourite Lithuanian tune. Then you must pass through the great opening to the...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

Jade Garden on the other side. Jade meanwhile was busy trimming the edges of her garden in case she should have an unexpected visitor drop by and want to examine her borders. Just then....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

there was a knock at the door. It was the the magnificent seven. They had fallen from a book and were on the lookout for the famous five.

One of the seven walked up to jade and said.................

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

"Here - grasp my belaying pin whilst I heave to and lower the mainsail". At this point Stingopants and the magnificent seven removed their sarks to reveal...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

their mighty musical instruments, and instantly burst into heavy metal! Jade was appalled at this and proceeded to..

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...polish Stingopants' bollards. Twas not long before the capstan turned of its own accord exposing the famous five again. Suddenly, there was a loud crack whereupon...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

The capstan opened, it was the dalek prison from doctor who. but for some reason it was only 2 feet high and all the daleks where only about a foot high. The first to come out was...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

sitting astride his mighty SV and was making the sound of elephants in love.I am the mighty Quiff and behold my......

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

goodness it's early. Sorry about the elephant noises, I was just clearing my throat. I have been imprisoned in this capstan a twelvemonth by the dastardly...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

... and Mutley duo from wacky racers. Whilst imprisoned, Penelope Pitstop in the Compact Pussycat would torment the prisoners by ...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

By squeeking in a highly annoying and falsetto voice. Meanwhile, in nearby ditch sat Johan, a secret service agent from Kazakhstan. He was enjoying his holiday so far, in fact it had been just like work, sleeping with beautiful double agents and hiding out in the local bushes waiting to catch ....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

his sister sleeping with their brother. Johan knew that it was going on but couldent put his finger on it. He had received some good advice from isle of wighters. Just then there was a huge bang and johan turned to see.....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

Dirk Kinvig, returning to kasakshtan to recover his BMW! Dirk last heard Johan was in possession, and was well up for...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

a bit of manly love, they held each others gaze as Dirks hands stroked Johans. The moment came for their first kiss, but just as they were about to touch lips, there was a rustle in the bushes next to them. Startled they both turned and looked into the face of.....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

Artoo, the cat that emits noxious gasses!!! dirk was already prepared, carrying around a gas mask, but the others..

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...would have faced instant death, if not for the heroic quiff, who was also in the bushes (again) to scare the cat off with the flash of his mighty...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...quarter pounder!! As the sun began its inexorable journey beyond the distant horizon, Stingopants wiped a tear from Dawn's eye, and making fast his belayin' pin he stowed his...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

Mighty musical instrument, turning as he heard a noise from the bushes. He observed a man dressed in simple robes, sandals on his feet, tanned skin with a beard. The man approached him and asked "Are you the Judean Peoples Front???"

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

And he said "f### off, we're the peoples front of judea!"... "Hang on a minute, what are we doing in a park in Clapham?"... And with that, they began...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...skipping down the street arm in arm and clicking their heels in a true Oliver Twist fashion, much to the amazement of the passersby.

Suddenly one passerby with a turned up nose walked in front of the jolly two and shouted "Halt!" Shortly followed by "Are you local?"

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

The two dodgy geezers looked at each other and, as one, pushed the nosey passerby into a nearby rubbish skip which had been conveniently left earlier by a local builder who had decided to go for lunch at a branch of subway that was only three streets away.

It was apparent to all present that something was not right...the town began to unravel as the threads that formed the visuality of the town were simultaneously pulled in different directions rather like something in a long forgotten Clive Barker novel. Would Stingopants be able to save the fragile tapestry of life before it was lost forever to the dreaded scourge? The answer to this could only be found in...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...a physics text book, but the mathematics was so hard that very few people could understand it! Stingo rang up his mate who lived over the road from oxford and asked him to run to the physics department to get some help. Unfortunatly...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...access was restricted to pirates and Stingo's mate wasn't allowed in. This was a job for the Sausage factory. Stingo got on the blower to....

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...his old and trusted mate Snorker who was wise in the ways of sausage factories. Curiously he was also knowledgeable in metaphysics and chaos theory and had more than an understanding of quantum mechanics. Snorker, realising that something was up, said that he would meet Stingo immediately in the 'Valiant Trooper', a well known haunt...they ordered a...

Re: Story thread: Read the story, write a few sentances and pass it on
 

...selection of 'Valiant Troopers' finest women. The two customers fluttered away many a note during the next few hours. All of a sudden they realised why they had met up in the first place. Discreetly getting to thier feet, in order as to not attract attention, the pair headed for the exits only to stumble across...