City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

OK so I'm getting almost daily tickets from a numpty of a warden who thinks it's ok to issue tickets on private property.

we get them every so often and appeal, usually with no problems and any that do drag on dissapear before court anyway.

Basically I'm parking on company property off the road but the public (who have NO RIGHT OF WAY) pass through as a short cut, this includes traffic wardens who for the most part know not to ticket bikes here.

I've had another ticket, appealed it, and another...and another...all from the same warden.
seems some monkey thinks he's found a jackpot and is visiting every day so I now have a nice pile of totally un-enforcable £120 tickets and I'm so sick of having to take time out to appeal these every single time that I want to make use of the orgs devious minds.

How do I make the most fun and amusment for myself with these tickets and waste these idiots time and money the way they keep wasting mine by forcing me to defend myself from them?

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Did you / can you claim loss of earnings?

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Not for them sticking some glorified stickers to my bike no :)
Mental anguish maybe lol ^_^

Was thinking more along the lines of anything I can do to tie the buggers up and make them work before I send them the photos of the bike and big bronze plaque mentioning that this is in fact private property with no right of way for the public and telling them to kindly go forth and multiply with themselves...again...

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Make a formal complaint (in writing)to the issuing authority.The complaint should be along the lines of its OK to make a mistake and issue a ticket once or twice,but when it is established that you commit no offence any further tickets amount to harrassment and you are looking for compensation.At the same time ask for a copy of their complaints policy to make sure they stick to the timelines in it.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Water Bucket.

Next time he comes round, soak him. Your not actually abusing him, jsut making them wet.

Then remind him that he's trespassing on private property, and if he steps on it again, he'll get another bucket load. With ice this time.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

electrify the bike

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Now thats a good one......

Then throw water? Double buzz?

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Hehe we could take this to a whole new level of psychological torture couldn't we?
Charge the bike but increase the charge slightly each day so it starts at static slowly getting to OW you bugger!
Then we start with the puddles of water and "suddenly breaking water pipes" + charged bike.
Give the guy a phobia of touching bikes for life!

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

send them a ticket for entering private property without the owners permission.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

+1

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

where abouts on your bike do they stick these tickets?

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Sometimes the screen, sometimes the rear seat, had it wrapped around my bars once which really annoyed me for some reason 0_O

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Is the area clearly marked as "Private Property"

If so can you not wait for the phantom ticketer to turn up, perform a citizens arrest for trespass and then phone the police ?

I know nothing about the legality of any of this, but it'd sure p*ss me off if somebody did that to me.

Is it the same warden each time ?

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Know what time he comes round?

Hide in a bush, jump out and scare the sh!t out of him?

Hide under youre bike cover and jump out when you hear him...

Emmm I shall have a think!!

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Follow the c*ck home and clone his plate so he sends himself a ticket.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

follow him home, and stick all the tickets hes given you, on his vehicle, see how he likes that!

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Start photocopying tickets for a week or two so you've got details of the number of tickets issued.

Then, when he passes buy ask for his identification. When he asks why, explain that you are going to complain to his manager about harassment. When he claims he's only doing his job, point out that he's on private property and not entitled to ticket your bike there. So what he's doing is harassment!

If he doesn't back down at this point it's time for a formal complaint. That's in writing with copies to:

a) His boss.
b) The numpty responsible for parking enforcement in the borough
c) The head of the council
d) Whoever is specified in the official complaints procedure

Be sure to include details of the location including photos, details of the tickets and the name of the warden(s) in question.


Edit - you might also want to set up CCTV monitoring your bike (with your bosses permission) so that if he vandalises your bike after his disciplinary hearing you can approach the council for compensation (and probably cost him his job). Vindictive but effective.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Sounds like harassment to me. Try a restraining order against the CEO - he's obviously got some grudge against you and shouldn't be allowed within 50 feet of you or your bike.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

have a look on the tickets and see if the time of issue is more or less the same each day.
would be worth having a word with the police saying that some knob is messing with your bike daily at xxxxx time.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

And some weird adhesive near the primary brake controls, attempted murder if you ask me!

Haha that is the best idea I have ever heard, this is definitely a must!!

If it's in London he is most probably a Nigerian immigrant, they used to ticket and clamp me all the time in Nottinghill, I'm so glad I don't work in London anymore...

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Racist.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

as has been siad, check the issuing times and if the same time everyday its harassment.

Check the private property signs and see you boss about stopping up the access used as a shortcut (as presumed right in law will become your enemy circa 20 year and its presumed right of way).

Camera the area as I've had this with a guy who got me a ticket (where presumed right was now happening as it had the parking in that location was evidencable for 30 years) and he was told where to go and had his car clamped (someone else did this after he peeved off the wrong person).

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Bollox. It is NOT racist.

I know :) Sorreh was just taking his comment out of context on purpose.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Put a cover over your bike.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Dont turn into matt-jokes

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

right, if the guy has stuck it on your rear seat, claim that the glue used on the ticket has affected the material and caused a visual damage to the seat and also caused your brake lever to stick sometimes, usually after you have removed the ticket from the handle-bars, and your screen is now scratched due to the wardens PERSISTANT ILLEGAL ticketing.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Stand there with a handy cam and just film him doing it, make sure you are polite and don't swear then send the evidence to his boss.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

the winner,

send it with a polite but firm letter stating x y & z and that this is your final correspondence and as such any further issued tickets will not be appealed and no court appearances will be made.

here's hoping.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

you could always just taser him and hide the body in an industrial unit, flee to brazil or mexico and live in luxury........for a week or two =P

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Thats assault im affraid.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

in fairness, just whack a cheap cover on your bike, they cant touch the cover, so you wont be annoyed with tickets, and your bike wont be attacked by small grit/gravel when the wind picks up like it has been lately.

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Some good ideas ;)
And I have always wanted to visit Mexico :)))

I was under the impression the rules/law had changed and wardens could now remove/move covers etc in order to check plates etc as long as due care was applied?

The Soho lot (been a while since I went :() should know :)

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Hmm, you need to get hold of a traffic Warden uniform, or something that looks very similar. Get a mate dressed up in it, go mad with the fake blood and then bundle your mate into the boot of a car whilst the real warden is around to see it :D

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

LOLLLLL!
I love it.
Then calmly turn to the guy, dust off your jacket and say, "sorry mate can you come back in *check watch* 20 minutes?, thanks!"

Re: City of london tickets - how to waste their time?
 

Want to borrow the MAC11 back?