cockney slang - Take a look
 

Right you mighty org london lot......decifier this...I will post up the answer later


Yer Cockney chitty-chitty numbers are all about bread. Not yer lolly wot ya got in ya greengages an' stuck in yer Walter Mitty (yer fish tank) like wot it says on the Beecham's. I'm talking about the sausage an' mash in yer sky rocket. Yer Nelson Eddies. Wot ya buys yer sherbert or pays yer brass with.
Speculate to 'ccumulate is a bunse innit? But, yer gonna need a knicker or two for the grey mare ta git ya from A to B. Then the geezer on the other end's gonna want to see the fibre of yer fabric.

Now, we're talkin' the kind of dosh yer use in The Smoke. The septics an' petrols come with their Oxford scholars a-plenty. Yer Cockney's are turtle to 'alf inchin' these Oxfords with a bit of clever use of the old North an' South an' a bit of the old banter. The patter knocks 'em bandy, an' yer Oxford's out and quids in, ain'tcha? Loverly! An' I says that's hairy muff.

Right then. A knicker is the base Samantha Mumba, also known as a sov, a quid or a one-er. The nifty of a knicker is a cow's calf. Five knicker is a lady (after the bike of Coventry), or a fiver. Two lady's are a tenner, to the value of a **** an' hen, or a cockle. The Barney Rubble of a cockle is a score, what is also known as an apple or a Dudley, or the Horn of Plenty.

Stick a fiver on a score an' ya got a pony, or macaroni. Between a lady and a pony ya got chop sticks, which ain't really used outside Bingo, an' used to be a tanner. Then there's a Baker's, which is a dozen plus one, an' a score plus two is dinky doo.

All crystal so far?

OK. Two ponys are a nifty. Two niftys are a ton. Five tons are a monkey, an' twin monkeys are a grand, or a bag of sand (last week I got word in me shell-like on the dog from me old man that they're sayin' a Rio Ferdinand back 'ome nah).

'course it all means naff all if yer on the rock an' roll, too boracic to pay the Duke of Kent and, in desparate for a rub-a-dub.
'an ya fink I'm 'avin' a Bushey Park? I ain't no chicken oriental ya know.
I'll leave ya with a word ta the wise: A forty-four will only cost ya gelt.