I didn't dare post this in Idle Banter for fear of abuse!
 

Tony Blair is at his office one morning, he takes a call from an advisor...

ADVISOR: "Good morning Prime Minister. Sir, I have some bad news. There was a fire in Sheffield last night. It seems that the Durex factory has burnt to the ground."

TONY BLAIR: "Oh my dear God, any casualties?"

ADV: "No sir, the nigh****chmen got out unharmed. However it has created a problem. Their storage warehouse and therefore the entire English stock of condoms has been wiped out."

TB: "Ahh, I see your point. You mean if we don't replenish nationwide stocks ASAP, we will have a baby boom in 9 months time, ruining the economy."

ADV: "That is correct sir. We advise you to ask your good friend Mr Bush for help in your time of national emergency."

TB: "Beg him for johnnies! Hell no! I'd be a laughing stock. We'd best keep this internal. Ask Jack McConnell to supply us from the Scottish stock. Promise him a bigger share in North Sea oil revenue for his generosity.

ADV: "May I suggest something? In return we'd like 5million red, white and blue condoms 12" long, 6" thick. That should make him feel important, but inferior at the same time."

TB: "Brilliant, action this plan."

A couple of days later a huge shipment of johnnies arrives in three trucks. A sample box is sent to No. 10 for approval.
Inside are indeed red, white and blue condoms. Each one has a gift tag. 'A present from Scotland. Size, small' :wink:

not the first time that jokes been around :lol:

It was allegedly attributed to Winston Churchill during WWII when they were asked to supply them to the Russians

foxy
 

really really bad tbh, as some-one whom scotland has been their home for 11 years and her best mate is Scottish and on this ite, sorry pal but very bad taste.

I thought it was the french - hence the name french letters?

or am i having a blonde moment again! :lol: