Social media and your responsibility

[gruntygiggles]

Just posting this here because some people I never thought would be so blind have done the following today.

The death of a lad I was at school with and knew quite well for a few years was posted by a few people i know on Facebook. He only passed away a couple of hours ago, so chances are high that not all of his loved ones have been informed yet.

He and all of his family, including most of his friends still live in Caldicot and so it would be very easy for family members and close friends to learn of his death through seeing an rip post on a Facebook news feed or tweet.

I haven't seen the man in question for about ten years, so this is in no way a sympathy thread. However, it did give me a shock to see it written out like that so goodness only knows how it would feel if you were really close to the person who had passed.

So...please people, when it comes to matters like this, name no names and ask yourself if it is really your place to be informing people via social media.

Thank you, that is all.

[BanannaMan]

+1

Sometimes the local gossip on FB is a bit much.
It may be meant for just your close friends but the whole blinking world sees what's on facebook.

[littleoldman2]

This isn't about social media, some people are just plain stupid and/or selfish and don't think before they speak, write, type or knock you off your bike. How terrible it must feel to pop onto here or FB and read that.

[Sir Trev]

It's fair to say some people cannot wait to be the "first" to break something in their chosen media. As if it makes them really important...

[gruntygiggles]

Originally Posted by Sir Trev

It's fair to say some people cannot wait to be the "first" to break something in their chosen media. As if it makes them really important...

Yep. I get that people want others to know that they knew the person and are grieving...but but that is done by paying your respects in a timely and appropriate manner.

This forum is a good place...a place where, when we have lost a member, the sharing of thatnews has been done, where possible by phone or personal visit to those closest to ensure that people aren't unduly hurt by finding out when ligging on. Also, it has been left to those closest to break the news on the forum itself.

Same should count for the likes of Facebook and Twitter. It is not that difficult to be respectful enought to wait a few days before publishing posts.

Social media itself is not to blame...but people do need to act responsibly. You wouldn't go and shout it in the high street, so don't do the same online.

Some people just seem incapable of considering anyone but themselves!

[SoulKiss]

Theres nothing "social" about Social Media

Its all just another advertising stream.

It's just thoughtlessness.

That said, one of my wife's friends broke the news of her boyfriends suicide through Facebook. OK, she must have been in a pretty poor state of mind, but it baffles me why somebody who's in that state wants to go near a computer anyway.

Who broke the news on Facebook in this instance? If a member of the family, then that's an internal issue for the family to deal with. If not a member of the family, why were they told before the rest of the family had been told anyway? Do we know for sure if it broke on FB before family members knew? Maybe whoever it was had spoken to the family, asked if it was OK, and had the families blessing to do it, some folk do and agree to strange things.

[gruntygiggles]

Nope...she knew about it as was on the scene and posted on Facebook when she got home about two hours later. She knew of him...but didn't know him any more than someone to say hello to in the pub.

I think you have to allow time, not everyone answers calls or picks up messages. In this instance it seemed more like a way to prove she was among the first to know rather than a genuine rest in peace sentiment.

Originally Posted by gruntygiggles

Nope...she knew about it as was on the scene and posted on Facebook when she got home about two hours later. She knew of him...but didn't know him any more than someone to say hello to in the pub.

I think you have to allow time, not everyone answers calls or picks up messages. In this instance it seemed more like a way to prove she was among the first to know rather than a genuine rest in peace sentiment.

She's a selfish and stupid cow then.

Totally respect the point of the OP.

On the flip side though I spent today at a funeral of my Uncle. A truly lovely guy who lived for his job as mechanic loved his family but by "normal" standards was a social hermit. Never wanted anything from anyone, stayed in touch by Birthday and Christmas cards, never had a wife or kids himself but always sent many many thousands of pounds over the years to nieces, nephews and friends children, most of those he'd never seen face to face.
One of these guys who genuinely lived life on his terms, lived for his cars, Guinness, fags and Guitars and never made an enemy in his life.

We were expecting sad quiet funeral of around 20 closest family. Except for the fact that one person heard about it, contacted some of his old colleagues on facebook and other media. Instead of a small group we had a church full and it was really bloody uplifting. That's all really, just saying like.