Divorce - Legal/experience type question

[BoltonSte]

No it's not me, We've just been round to my sister in laws house and she has told us that my mother in law is now going to try and claim some of her ex husbands pension.

They have been divorced since '03, it was done as irreconcilable (sp?) differences (an internet jobbie) although at the time she was having an affair (and is still with him) my father in law has since got remarried.
This has all come about as her chap (who she was having the affair with) is due to get divorced and will loose half of what he has. The problem is, this has put both their daughters in a difficult position as the animosity, if she goes ahead with this, will no doubt affect family gatherings etc.....

The question (see there is one eventually) is this: If she goes forward with claiming part of the pension, would he be able to 're-open' the reason why they were divorced? in doing so I assume my wife and her sister may be asked certain questions that may bring to light their mother was having an affair pre and at the time of the divorce, would this effect her ability to claim some of her ex's pension?

Aplologies for being so long winded, but as my wife is planning to 'discuss' the matter further forewarned is forearmed.


Ste

[the_lone_wolf]

So let me get this straight, she has an affair, gets a quicky internet divorce to go live with her new man.

Her new man then gets divorced (from the person he was married to while they've been together all this time presumably?) and loses half his money.

And now she wants to go back four years later and get a bit more out of the man she had an affair behind the back of in the first place?

Wow, i hope i've missed something important here because that's just low, really low...

[BoltonSte]

Nope that's bang on and as we think bang out of order.

The thing is she doesn't think the father-in-law knows of the affair, I don't think he's that stupid and his wife definately isn't. She's not really thinking of the consequences of her actions only that her lifestyle will change form having a chap who's worth ~100K a year to much lower.

But like I said, if the missues can find out if she would loose out, then she can try and make her realise it before she starts anything official, her dad won't find out and we can keep the status quo.

Can't choose your family eh?

personally ihope she gets stuff all, money grabbing *****!!

[BoltonSte]

Yeah I forgot about Ed, supposadly since 2000 it's been possible to revisit cases and try an eek more out of the setlement, although this is a bit third hand.

I will see what Ed has to say.

Dammit, after I wrote it all out it's telling me Ed's inbox is full.

Cheers

Ste

[the_lone_wolf]

ok, fair enough, i can't give any legal advice on the subject but as i've experienced what it's like to see a close family member in a one sided marriage where they put in everything, financially and emotionally, only to have the other person turn around and try to screw them out of everything, i'd be inclined to tip off the father in law about the affair or at least warn him about the impending threat, and tell the thieving woman that i'd done so... but that's just me

i'm sure someone will be along with a more practical answer, but i hope you and your wife get through the mess relatively unscathed

I'm not a violent man by any stretch of the imagination, but if my ex-wife came after me for more money now, I'd punch her feckin' lights out.

I hope you're being honest in how you feel about this when you talk to your M-I-L. Have you told her she's a money-grabbing tart?

LMAO@ Lozzo.

when i got divorced 2 years ago I was told that all monetary things had to be sorted before divorce. i decided not to claim on his pension. Maybe scottish law is different but I was told that once I was divorced I could not at a later date make a claim against him for money even if he won the lottery.

I would say its tough poop on her. she made her bed. she will just need to get a job or stop spending money lol

Originally Posted by neio79

personally ihope she gets stuff all, money grabbing *****!!

Neio, you're a class act -cut to the chase!!

I've been there! It will depend on what the legal position was when the divorce was completed. Mine was a full and final settlement through the courts and I kept my pension out of it and have since assigned it to my wife (No.2 - first isn't always best!!!! )

The reason for the divorce or breakup is totally irrelevant it is simply a matter to provide a reason to the court that a divorce can be granted etc. I lost just about everything, house, kids (in reality as everything was 100% her terms - beyond my means to be able to fight) huge sums of money (15 years on and still paying personal maintenance - kids are 22 and 20!!)

Whilst in court (and I'm not blaming her/me etc) it was definitely and very heavily biased towards the mother as parent with care. Ok to some point but I was only permited a very basic existence everything went o her. With Benefits, CSA and personal maintenance her net monthly income was more than mine!

it would seem to me that the odds are stacked in your mother-in-laws favour if there wasn't a specal provisions made. I would hope that a sensible judge would say she was being unreasonable but my experience indicated that reasonable didn't come into it.