Women

Originally Posted by Sid Squid

Discussion not required. All utterly bonkers.

This may be part of the charm though.

As my mate Ken would say "If they didn't have fa*ni*s we'd throw rocks at 'em"

women = headache
headache = go for ride
return home = women
women = headache
headache = go for another ride
return home = women

repeat until dead

[Jayneflakes]

Sorry boys, but from my experience, you lot are 'orrible. While I type this my Ex Boyfriend who has come to visit and my current Girlfriend who I live with, are discussing computer techie stuff while having a fag, so I think that I can comment quite freely on both.

Girls
Smell nice
Are soft to the touch
Are a nice shape
Wear nice clothes
Make nice noises when being intimate
Enjoy going out as a couple
Will share House work
Will be sporting with you
Look good in a mini skirt



Boys
Smell funny
Are covered in sticky out bits and course sharp hair that irritates the skin
Can be nice, but tend to have a beer belly and are dressed by their Mum
Think that changing their pants once a day is optional
Grunt like they are changing a tyre
Enjoy going out with their mates
Want a cook, cleaner and child minder
Will be sporting against you
Can look good in a mini skirt

Women are not mad, we are just sick of your Sh*t!

However, if you boys think you have it bad, try being a girl and in a relationship with a girl.

Bad points
She uses your razor to do her overly busy bikini, but leaves the blade!
She borrows your clothes, puts them in her drawer and you have to buy more.
She gets mood swings at the same time that you do.
Her Mother asks which one of you acts in the man role.
Her brother creeps you out by asking if he can watch.
He Father has the chat with you, but gets confused because he keeps looking at your chest.
Being intimate means playing Scrabble, unless she is dyslexic.
Your own Mother ask how you are going to give them Grandchildren and then cries.
She has a bigger bust than you and you get jealous.
She has a smaller waist than you and you get jealous.
She has smaller feet than your own gargantuan plates of meat and her shoes are prettier.


Actually, why do I want to spend any time with other human beings at all, I am sticking with Religion and staying away from that kind of thing!

On balance I quite like 'em. Apart from Jennifer Watson who ditched me in front of all her mates at a party. I don't like her at all.

[NTECUK]

Originally Posted by Lozzo

simply misunderstood?

Discuss

Not from the same planet, How can you understand venusion. I lost the manual for mine , not sure if it came with one.

Same old story, how can you trust something that bleeds for a week and doesn't die?

[Bibio]

Originally Posted by speedplay

Same old story, how can you trust something that bleeds for a week and doesn't die?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kCH8-OkLuJY

Originally Posted by Bibio

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kCH8-OkLuJY

Before I open that, is it u rated...?

[Bibio]

yes...

[Paul the 6th]

Women are from venus and men are from mars.

Venus: Surface temperature of 460 degrees C and rains sulphuric acid.
Mars: Home to the future human colonies.