How to drive hire cars

Originally Posted by Dan

Have an 'accident' after a curry, on the front seats and floor.

What, **** himself?

Best I can come up with is to avoid using the brakes as much as possible - rely on engine braking. Oh man, the lights just changed. Into 1st/2nd!

[STRAMASHER]

FIELD! FIELD! FIELD!

MUD ON THE ROOF! MUD ON THE ROOF!

Go for the whole Colin McCrae experience. Rally the **** out of it! Get that engine smelling of carrots. (You will see, if you are doing it right )

[Dave20046]

*best thread ever*

Originally Posted by Dave20046

*best thread ever*

most criminal thread ever - you guys!

[gruntygiggles]

Originally Posted by appollo1

if you can get access to a beach, drive around in the sand and through the shallow water - salt water will play havoc underneath.

Bring it over to Fife - i know a good off road track!!!

Slightly off subject, but where??? Me and Stretchie are coming up in 10 days for a holiday and just got some new traction track off road tyres on the Discovery so any decent off road lanes that won't require a winch would be very welcomed by us!

Stay in first and second gear without using the clutch to change, and take it on a motorway with the rev limiter ticking for a few miles.

To be honest, its a lot of damage though for £20? Just lay a brick in the glove compartment.

[gruntygiggles]

Try to drive absolutely everywhere in 3rd gear. If you stop at lights, leave it in third. Yes, you'll be slow and will **** of the drivers behind you but that little engine will have to struggle like **** as you ride the clutch and drive it off before revving the life out of it on the motorway. Doesn't work in a disco, I can drive the disco everywhere in 5th gear and it will still pull away quite nicley from standstill without really bothering the engine. Tried it in my old Saxo and nearly killed the car!!!

[gruntygiggles]

Find a kerb that is not so high that it will damage the bumpers or wings, but that you can go up at a decent speed to really give the axles and shocks a good working!

Just watch out for the airbags!

Originally Posted by Magnum

Stay in first and second gear without using the clutch to change, and take it on a motorway with the rev limiter ticking for a few miles.

To be honest, its a lot of damage though for £20? Just lay a brick in the glove compartment.

Will a house brick fit in the glove compartment? Be a bit messy with the mortar

[Paul the 6th]

Loving the "report it as stolen once you've returned it to the rental place" idea...


You could just curl out a big steaming turd on the roof of the car and then return it. If anyone asks just do a great big *SIGH* and say "We've been having a bit of trouble with our dog lately"

Fill up with fuel and drive off without paying immediately before returning the car? Might be slightly illegal though, so just double check that one

To be honest, I'd just practice my best get away driving on an industrial estate: monster handbrake turns, J-turns, reverse donuts, maybe build a small ramp and stack some cardboard boxes in front of the landing point = don't forget to video it with some cheesy 70's guitar music....

Wee in the radiator? pop the air filter our and fill the airbox with Icing sugar...

take pictures of the car and advertise it for sale on autotrader as a mint condition 2,000 miles ultra low price.... all with the phone number of the garage of course. This will cost you a bit of money but it'll wind the garage right up.

Get some parking tickets for ridiculous parking then leave them in the glovebox for the garage to deal with?

just a few of my pathetic childish thoughts...