How to drive hire cars

There is so much mischief going on in this thread I love it!

rally driving.

Originally Posted by cb5_keith

My personal fave way to **** around/bald the tyres - go as fast in reverse as possible, clutch down, first gear, revs upppppppppppp, clutch out!
nothing like going backwards in a plume of smoke, then shooting off forwards

that might also cause the g/box to implode....yea, go for it!

do some cheap boy-racer mods to it

Originally Posted by Dan

Water in the oil, oil in the water - block the radiator and disconnect the cooling fan to force an overheat and blow the head gasket.

Sand in the engine?

Tea bags in the fuel tank will dissolve and cause multiple blocked fuel filters (so I'm told!).

Have an 'accident' after a curry, on the front seats and floor.

Get a child to be sick in the car, because it will stink for months.

Spill a pint of milk under the floor mats just before you hand the car back.

'Fray' the timing belt with a Dremel.

'Fray' the auxiliary drive belt with a Dremel.

Remove hub bearing nuts, pack bearings with sand, refit nuts.

Buy a couple of mice and leave them to breed in the car.

Carborundum grinding paste on the windscreen wipers.

'Accidentally' drive over a lot of large nails just before handing the car back.

Post the number plates all over the internet and encourage cloning to introduce administrative hassle.

Report the car as stolen after handing it back.

There's plenty more, but that's a start.

You talking from experience?

This thread is so evil is brilliant..!

[Mr Speirs]

Slightly undo every single bolt on the car. Obviously not the ones on the wheel that would cause a nasty accident but every other one.

[Skip]

Quality thread!

I think most of them would leave an obvious mark though! Thrashing the nuts off it everywhere (especially from cold) and clutchless gearchanges are the way to go though I think.

Remind me never to buy a second hand car from you lot!

Originally Posted by Skip

Quality thread!

I think most of them would leave an obvious mark though! Thrashing the nuts off it everywhere (especially from cold) and clutchless gearchanges are the way to go though I think.

Remind me never to buy a second hand car from you lot!

I like that idea of thrashing from cold. To make it better, dont use 1st gear other than for engine braking. In the mornings, pull away in second, right to the rev limiter!

[ophic]

Originally Posted by Ed

Accidentally drop a mackerel...

Insert the fish somewhere in the ventilation system - inaccessible and it'll reek forever. Preferably somewhere where it gets warm from the engine.

Originally Posted by Miss Alpinestarhero

You talking from experience?

This thread is so evil is brilliant..!

All things I have either witnessed or been told about. I have NEVER done any of these things myself.

Except the auxiliary drive belt/Dremel interface. I used that one to get out of driving a Vauxhall Astra for work once. It was away for a week whilst the garage investigated the mysterious snapped belt, and I got to drive around in a Fiesta which didn't give me backache.