So, some good news from me ;) - SV650.org

northwind · 03-05-06, 12:01 AM

I was up at the hospital today for my MOT and apparently the risk of needing a hip replacement is now down to about 1/50... I like those odds

I like my hopelessly inept consultant, seems to be a very good surgeon but he hasn't got the social graces of a skunk. Walks in with a bundle of xrays. "Are you the hip, or the arm" "Hip" Puts an x-ray of an arm up on the board. "Well, your hip's fine, see you in a year" Had to more or less rugby tackle him to get any actual info out of him

But I figure, if he's that socially inept, he clearly got the job through his superior butchery skills.

03-05-06, 12:41 AM

Aye they dont like to spend any time explaining things these days......but good news is good news

03-05-06, 01:39 AM

so what has your hip in such a bad state?

03-05-06, 05:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by philipMac

so what has your hip in such a bad state?

03-05-06, 07:12 AM

I'm convinced that my consultant hangs out at soup kitchens

03-05-06, 09:24 AM

Thats good news buddy! Why was your hip dodgy in the first place?

In related news, I got a letter through too recently.
"Dear Mr Warthog, we would like to MRI scan your head."

Well it was bound to happen lol

03-05-06, 10:57 AM

I'm worried that so many of us (me included) have consultants!

northwind · 03-05-06, 11:36 AM

Well, cut a long story shortish, I slipped on a patch of ice in my driveway last january and fractured it right at the neck (like old people do) But luckily I was a good candidate for in-situ traction, so they bolted it back together (with 3 M8 bolts

) and basically left it to see what would happen. It's a good trick, apparently 5 years ago it would've been a replacement for sure, and that'd mean more surgery every 10 years or so to replace the replacement. The new traction methods take longer to heal from, but they heal far better and permanently.

There's a 1/5 chance that the blood vessels that feed the head of the femur have taken too much damage, and that causes it to die off over time... Which calls for a hip replacement. Also about a 1/3 chance that further surgery's needed for the bolts, since they can end up sticking out of the bone far enough to interfere with the muscles- some bones need to crush together to heal, apparently, so the bolts have a plain shank through the outside of the hip, to allow the bone to slide along it. (PS:

)

So it's looking pretty good. One bolt is pulled out almost far enough to be a problem, they'll check that out later but apparently I'll know all about it if it starts to interfere with the muscles (twang! twang!), and there's no sign of the bloodflow being a problem. Delighted.

Always wear your gear! Even if you're just walking! (I was wearing my Belstaff cordura gear, but no hip armour pockets

) If I'd had the same break while riding there'd have been no chance at all of doing the surgery they did, since it would have displaced too far... So if you have trousers with hip armour pockets, but no armour, get them filled. £5 for a set of Knox armour from Infinity just now.

03-05-06, 12:15 PM

Hey good news at last - now the next challenge is for Northy to make it through a whole week without stubbing his toe!

Of the two consultants I've had in the past, one was really nice, great bedside manner n all that - but what he did to my leg (whilst sounding great from him at the time) may have caused me more problems in the long term - 18 years later.

My current consultant I swear is a candidate for sexual realignment. He just looks like he should be a woman - his mannerisms n stuff. Pleasant enough person and a great surgeon - but seriously, he should either be a woman, was a woman or is secretly a very good, highly intelligent serial killer...

... you know, the type who taunts police offiers to catch him in bad movies cos they're too dumb. Until along comes this one, brilliant but unorthox officer who finally catches him (usually at the cost of their partner's life or something).

Only I think my consultant would actually still get away with it. He's very pale, almost albino - and just very weirdly creepy but in a fascinatingly nice and approachable way.

He'd make the type of James Bond villan who actually knew the value of shooting first and monologuing later.

03-05-06, 02:26 PM

You have had some mental accidents Northy man. I suppose thats what you get for living in freezy Scotland.

Having said that, some ******* drove his car into me this morning, because I filtered past him. Now my left peg is knackered. Hopefully the thing will just come off, and not be all bollixed and bend in.

Bugger.

03-05-06, 12:01 AM	#1
northwind Moderator Mega Poster Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: In the garage where I belong Posts: 17,082	So, some good news from me ;) I was up at the hospital today for my MOT and apparently the risk of needing a hip replacement is now down to about 1/50... I like those odds I like my hopelessly inept consultant, seems to be a very good surgeon but he hasn't got the social graces of a skunk. Walks in with a bundle of xrays. "Are you the hip, or the arm" "Hip" Puts an x-ray of an arm up on the board. "Well, your hip's fine, see you in a year" Had to more or less rugby tackle him to get any actual info out of him But I figure, if he's that socially inept, he clearly got the job through his superior butchery skills. __________________ "We are the angry mob, we read the papers every day We like what we like, we hate what we hate But we're oh so easily swayed"

03-05-06, 11:36 AM	#8
northwind Moderator Mega Poster Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: In the garage where I belong Posts: 17,082	Well, cut a long story shortish, I slipped on a patch of ice in my driveway last january and fractured it right at the neck (like old people do) But luckily I was a good candidate for in-situ traction, so they bolted it back together (with 3 M8 bolts ) and basically left it to see what would happen. It's a good trick, apparently 5 years ago it would've been a replacement for sure, and that'd mean more surgery every 10 years or so to replace the replacement. The new traction methods take longer to heal from, but they heal far better and permanently. There's a 1/5 chance that the blood vessels that feed the head of the femur have taken too much damage, and that causes it to die off over time... Which calls for a hip replacement. Also about a 1/3 chance that further surgery's needed for the bolts, since they can end up sticking out of the bone far enough to interfere with the muscles- some bones need to crush together to heal, apparently, so the bolts have a plain shank through the outside of the hip, to allow the bone to slide along it. (PS: ) So it's looking pretty good. One bolt is pulled out almost far enough to be a problem, they'll check that out later but apparently I'll know all about it if it starts to interfere with the muscles (twang! twang!), and there's no sign of the bloodflow being a problem. Delighted. Always wear your gear! Even if you're just walking! (I was wearing my Belstaff cordura gear, but no hip armour pockets ) If I'd had the same break while riding there'd have been no chance at all of doing the surgery they did, since it would have displaced too far... So if you have trousers with hip armour pockets, but no armour, get them filled. £5 for a set of Knox armour from Infinity just now. __________________ "We are the angry mob, we read the papers every day We like what we like, we hate what we hate But we're oh so easily swayed"

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03-05-06, 12:41 AM	#2
SVTONYB Guest Posts: n/a	Aye they dont like to spend any time explaining things these days......but good news is good news

03-05-06, 01:39 AM	#3
philipMac Guest Posts: n/a	so what has your hip in such a bad state?

03-05-06, 07:12 AM	#5
Mr Toad Guest Posts: n/a	I'm convinced that my consultant hangs out at soup kitchens

03-05-06, 09:24 AM	#6
Warthog Guest Posts: n/a	Thats good news buddy! Why was your hip dodgy in the first place? In related news, I got a letter through too recently. "Dear Mr Warthog, we would like to MRI scan your head." Well it was bound to happen lol

03-05-06, 10:57 AM	#7
Sudoxe Guest Posts: n/a	I'm worried that so many of us (me included) have consultants!

03-05-06, 12:15 PM	#9
K Guest Posts: n/a	Hey good news at last - now the next challenge is for Northy to make it through a whole week without stubbing his toe! Of the two consultants I've had in the past, one was really nice, great bedside manner n all that - but what he did to my leg (whilst sounding great from him at the time) may have caused me more problems in the long term - 18 years later. My current consultant I swear is a candidate for sexual realignment. He just looks like he should be a woman - his mannerisms n stuff. Pleasant enough person and a great surgeon - but seriously, he should either be a woman, was a woman or is secretly a very good, highly intelligent serial killer... ... you know, the type who taunts police offiers to catch him in bad movies cos they're too dumb. Until along comes this one, brilliant but unorthox officer who finally catches him (usually at the cost of their partner's life or something). Only I think my consultant would actually still get away with it. He's very pale, almost albino - and just very weirdly creepy but in a fascinatingly nice and approachable way. He'd make the type of James Bond villan who actually knew the value of shooting first and monologuing later.

03-05-06, 02:26 PM	#10
philipMac Guest Posts: n/a	You have had some mental accidents Northy man. I suppose thats what you get for living in freezy Scotland. Having said that, some ******* drove his car into me this morning, because I filtered past him. Now my left peg is knackered. Hopefully the thing will just come off, and not be all bollixed and bend in. Bugger.