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Old 28-11-07, 08:10 PM   #1
Treacle
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Unhappy A terrible shame!!!

A friend of mine sent me this today via email.

I feel for the poor bloke.


Dear Abby,
I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what
could be a crucial decision. I've suspected for some time now that my wife
has been cheating on me.
The usual signs... phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife
has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their
names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."
I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she always
walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she has
gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn't in a taxi?
I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and she went
berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I
checking up on her.
Anyway, I did not broach the subject with my wife again. I think deep down I
just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I
decided to really check on her. I decided I was going to park my 2006 Yamaha
R1 motorcycle next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a
good view of the whole street when she came home.
It was at that moment, crouching behind my Yamaha R1, that I noticed that
the valve covers on my engine seemed to be leaking a little oil.
Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the dealer?
Thanks.
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Old 28-11-07, 08:12 PM   #2
ASM-Forever
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

LMAO.

Quality.
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Old 28-11-07, 08:15 PM   #3
colinsv25
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

heard it before but it gets better every time i read it
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Old 28-11-07, 08:17 PM   #4
the white rabbit
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

It was a distracted BMW owner, previously
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Old 28-11-07, 08:21 PM   #5
Ratty
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

Similar to this one: -

Letter to an “Agony Uncle”……
_
Dear Walter:

I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work leaving my
husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't gone more than a
mile down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a
halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help. When I got home I
couldn't believe my eyes. He was in the bedroom with a neighbor lady making
mad passionate love to her. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been
married for twelve years.

When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he went into the back
yard and heard a lady scream, had come to her rescue but found her
unconscious. He'd carried the woman back to our house, laid her in bed, and
began CPR. When she awoke she immediately began thanking him and kissing him and he
was attempting to break free when I came back. But when I asked him why neither of them
had any clothes on, he broke down and admitted that he'd been having an affair for the past six months.

I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six
months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and
worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he
has become increasingly distant. I don't feel I can get through to him
anymore.

Can you please help?

Sincerely,
Mrs.. Sheila Usk
---------------------------

Dear Sheila:

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a
variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris
in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum
pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the
problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low
delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.
I hope this helps.

Walter
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Old 28-11-07, 08:24 PM   #6
the white rabbit
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

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Old 28-11-07, 08:46 PM   #7
Stig
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

The old ones always the best ones.
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Old 28-11-07, 09:30 PM   #8
Ed
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

Yes this is very good

Incidentally Dr Rich, I don't like your new avatar
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Old 28-11-07, 09:36 PM   #9
DoubleD
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

oldie but goldies
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Old 29-11-07, 12:42 PM   #10
Daimo
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Default Re: A terrible shame!!!

Two drums roll off a cliff..
















Boom Boom....

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