Hovis and the AR and grief.

[Quiff Wichard]

Can I raise an issue . a "concern"

I don't want to upset anyone and apologise if this comes across as wrong.

I contemplated posting this after the funeral when the initial hurt and pain and grief and even anger have had an outlet and things have calmed down from the initial shock of Dave passing .


I knew Dave as well as many on here but not as well as some.

However , point remains I am not part of his family,

I want to be at the funeral, I want to pay my respects, but and I am going to be honest here -
I dont want to lunge,
I dont want to wave a yellow balloon etc etc
I think my / our presence there is duty enough to represent the org. I think a biker representation is a bloody strong thing for his mum to agree to (if I understand Mogs' post correctly she has said it must be so)

so , just all the bikes being there and us in numbers would in my opinion suffice.

I got sucked in by the emotion and indeed I have offered suggestions of yellow t ****s etc , but a post by someone after the Lunge suggestion and a thread started for some Happy chat .. really made me sit back and think - Thanks Mike, Thanks Tim .


We do not have monopoly on grief for Dave , He has family, close friends, childhood friends, other local not national forums etc etc . I dont think we need to stand higher or louder or more yellow to prove to anyone that we loved him more or miss him more.. a direction to the org, as Mogs has done on our behalf is sufficient I feel. In time, his family and close friends will have the strength to view the pages and outpourings and pictures etc and realise that Dave had a lot of friends that they didnt know and the commets and donations and page views in such a short time should be memorium to him from the ORG.

Yes of course I would wear a yellow armband, or tie a yellow ribbon to my bike , but in my opinion, upsetting as it may be we have to put our Grief aside, or rather subdue it and look at the bigger picture.


I hope that is not taken the wrong way - it is just a point to be pondered.

Please don't react and type immediately, sit and think




It seems that Hovis has been omni present since his passing, goodness he was on here enough before ! (bless him) I used to pop on every day to see what the argumentative bugger had posted and what reaction he got , now there are no new posts from him and yet his name is everywhere..

I miss him , I liked him, lots of you closer than me loved him - I never ever thought of him until I read his posts on here, I didnt sit in my dressing gown like I am now and not be bothered to make a brew when he was around , and yet now, this guy I only meet now and again and have a laugh with has had such a profound effect on me.. maybe it is making me question my own mortality and my life and my biking and take stock - I don't know..

but what I do know is it has affected me and I also know from experience that it will subside, not go away , but it will turn in to a warm feeling when I think of him, that;s cos I am old and I have had experience of lost loved ones before . I won't stop thinking of him but I wont be thinking of constantly as I am now.

And what I do know is that it has affected others too, and this org is a valve, an outlet for the pain and grief and the desperate feeling of uselesness and so , efforts are made to fill the void, to represent, to show the world that we had a good friend called Hovis who we lost.. but:

again I may be out of turn and I may be too early and next week might have been a better time to post my musings but :

I am not sure if AR 10 should become such a major Hovis memorium, talk of yellow everything, a life size bread sculpture, minutes silences or minutes applause, releasing balloons... etc etc ... it is all good it is all nice but I hope that in this time of grief we come to realise that maybe such thoughts are at the moment cathartic and maybe after we , and moreover his family have laid him to rest next week the populous may decide that AR10 the Hovis TT and folk drinking a salute to him over the weekend in their own way at their own pace may suffice.. Hovis was a big character , he was one of the main organisers of the AR10 but he alone was not the Org, none of us are more than the org individually but "the sum of the parts" etc .......

I am not being aggressive, offensive or dispassionate , I don't want to insult and I certainly dont want to fall out with his closest mates on here, but maybe because I was not as close as some to Dave I can take an overview not so clouded by tears and anger and say :

Ideas that have been posted are knee jerk reactions, initial thoughts and very ostentatious but understandable at this time.

Maybe the melee of the last week has born ideas that whilst with good intent and admirable are not entirely practical or even dare I say rational.

We need to do Dave proud, we need to represent the org and we need to recognise we have lost a good friend, both at the funeral and at the AR but we can do that in a way that is not so "out there" and that its very self dilutes its reason for being - and of course respects his family and his memory


My fellow orgers , close friends of Dave on here, you all know I am a nice guy (deep down) I mean no offence and I have pondered over posting this all night- I have not slept and am sat in my dressing gown as I type.

I dont want to fall out with anyone over this post. I just want to try and approach the matter from a different angle, it is not a competition, it is not a chance to show who loved Hovis the best - it is an opportunity to be united and respectfully show our grief , our friendship and our love


Well, I took the risk, but I hope it's worth it , as it was becoming a snowball that was gatheing too much too fast and maybe needs to slow down .

If I get PM's saying I am out of order If it means some folk think I am wrong then in the words of the immortal - "Faarrrkinn Unlluucckeeee" on me


With love

Quiff. x

[_Stretchie_]

Originally Posted by Quiff Wichard

I want to be at the funeral, I want to pay my respects, but and I am going to be honest here -
I dont want to lunge,
I dont want to wave a yellow balloon etc etc
I think my / our presence there is duty enough to represent the org. I think a biker representation is a bloody strong thing for his mum to agree to (if I understand Mogs' post correctly she has said it must be so)

so , just all the bikes being there and us in numbers would in my opinion suffice.

Well done Quiff, been thinking the same but to be honest a bit wary of posting anything becaue I'm a bit of a coward

I just want to be there on my bike, not make a big scene when turning up, no gimmiks, be quiet when I should be, not bounce the bike off the limiter even if that's what he used to do, let his family know he was a big part of us and do the fella proud.

[Quiff Wichard]

cheers Dan,

I only saying what a lot of folk are thinking..








maybe ?

i think thats a very good, sensible post Quiff.

i hope others react rationally, and i'm sure they will. im sure many will agree and some will disagree. like you i too have lost friends in the past and the imediate aftermath of we'll do this that and the other in memory was indeed a knee jerk, and of course affectionate and geniune, reaction.

as you've said others knew him better, so maybe my post is a pointless one, but i guess it is said in response to your concerns over upsetting people.

Spot on Quiff.

Nobody here should take offence to what you have written as you speak from the heart and all is ment with the best of intention.

We all miss the little bugger and yes we want to do him proud but we should sit and read over and over what Quiff has written as it makes sense.

Cheers for having the bollox to post this Quiff

My knee jerk reaction is to say 'Quite, I agree with you'.

[timwilky]

Fully support what you are saying mate.

I have thought the exact same thing's as you Quiff.

I believe Hovis would want us to live it large at the Hovis TT and that's what I intend to do. I will be attending his funeral, but it should be for his family to say goodbye etc.

It is right, I had a discussion with another member briefly yesterday, but I think it seems fitting to do things properly and respectfully.

You know what though Quiff, the little buggar will be sitting up there probably thinking, 'bunch of poofs'.

Said it all in my PM.....

Respect you for posting it! x