drive through cash machines

TO OUR VALUED CUSTOMERS:
Barclays Bank is very pleased to inform you that we are installing new "Drive-thru" cash point machines where our customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. To enable our customers to make full use of these new facilities, we have conducted intensive behavioural studies to come up with appropriate procedures for their use. Please read the procedures that apply to you and remember them for when you use our new machines for the first time.

PROCEDURES FOR OUR MALE CUSTOMERS:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Wind down your car window.
3. Insert card into and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Wind up window.
7. Drive off.
>PROCEDURES FOR OUR FEMALE CUSTOMERS:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse back the required amount to align car window with cash machine.
3. Re-start the stalled engine.
4. Wind down the window.
5. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
6. Turn the radio down.
7. Attempt to insert card into machine.
8. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
9. Insert card.
10. After "Invalid Card" is displayed - Remove the afore mentioned "Marks & Spencer’s" Charge card and insert correct Cash Point card
11. Remove Cash Point Card
12. Re-insert Cash Point card the right way up.
13. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
14. Enter PIN.
15. Press "Cancel" and re-enter correct PIN.
16. Enter amount of cash required.
17. Check make-up in rear view mirror.
18. Retrieve cash and receipt.
19. Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside.
20. Place receipt in back of chequebook.
21. Re-check make-up.
22. Drive forward 2 meters.
23. Reverse back to cash machine.
24. Retrieve card.
25. Re-empty handbag, locate cardholder, and place card into the slot provided.
26. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
27. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
28. Release handbrake.

hehe :P i got excited looking at the subject line - they have these all over america and its so lazy its brilliant!

And there was me thinking this thread was about speed cameras,

Daryl.

I think that's SEXIST Hovis!!


ADMIN.......!!!


:P

Very good tho!

[Biker Biggles]

I thought it would be about ram raiding.

Originally Posted by Biker Biggles

I thought it would be about ram raiding.

Hmmm.. given Hovi5' location I wouldn't rule that out

There was some survey or another the other day listing not replacing toilet rolls as women's number one gripe with men. I'd like to agree with the above and say my number one annoyance is women in the express queue who wait till they have (slowly) packed their bag before reaching into their handbag to get their purse and then spending 10mins going though that zip-up bit at the front trying to find the right money in 2p pieces only to realise they can't do it and pay with the £20 they got out 10min before

You've been queueing for 5min, just tot up the total and get your money ready or is adding up the price of a tub of Hagan Daaz and cat food too taxing

Originally Posted by Smurf

Hmmm.. given Hovi5' location I wouldn't rule that out this is a racist comment

There was some survey or another the other day listing not replacing toilet rolls as women's number one gripe with men. I'd like to agree with the above and say my number one annoyance is women in the express queue who wait till they have (slowly) packed their bag before reaching into their handbag to get their purse and then spending 10mins going though that zip-up bit at the front trying to find the right money in 2p pieces only to realise they can't do it and pay with the £20 they got out 10min before

You've been queueing for 5min, just tot up the total and get your money ready or is adding up the price of a tub of Hagan Daaz and cat food too taxing

wheres coolgirl??

i drive like a bloke !!!!!!! #

Well done Hovi5

sexist on this thread and racist on another.

[Biker Biggles]

Yeah---watch it Hovis if you start getting ageist I'll be down there interfering with your sheep shanks.