View Full Version : Rictus
Mark - you never cease to amaze me with your bravery, you are an inspiration to all of us :kiss: take it easy hun and i'll see you at Verna's do next week if you can make it
T xx
rictus01
16-11-06, 12:11 PM
:kiss: take it easy hun and i'll see you at Verna's do next week if you can make it
T xx
all plans in place to attend, and I'll be expecting to collect on all hugs & kisses promised :wink:
Cheers Mark.
Supervox
16-11-06, 12:57 PM
Mark - Glad to hear that you're mending :D bummer about the pain though
:cry:
:kiss: take it easy hun and i'll see you at Verna's do next week if you can make it
T xx
all plans in place to attend, and I'll be expecting to collect on all hugs & kisses promised :wink:
Cheers Mark.
no problem :D
krazykim
17-11-06, 03:58 PM
Been reading your posts and i really feel for you Mark. I (touch wood) have never broken a single bone in my body so cannot even comprehend the pain you are feeling. Keep gritting your teeth and get through it one day at a time and then those days will eventually turn into weeks. X
BernardBikerchick
21-11-06, 08:48 AM
hi gorgeous xx hope you doing ok be seeing you later on if ok xxxx prob about 3ih xx
rictus01
21-11-06, 08:53 AM
hi gorgeous xx hope you doing ok be seeing you later on if ok xxxx prob about 3ih xx
You're in luck, Ican't run away :wink:
hi gorgeous xx hope you doing ok be seeing you later on if ok xxxx prob about 3ih xx
You're in luck, Ican't run away :wink:
I always forget to do that...
rictus01
24-11-06, 06:43 AM
Update time again.
day 44 after the event (only 44 days, seems like a life time ago)
the Physical
The cast is once again loose on my leg, yet I think the surgery wounds have healed enough so that I’m not getting the sharp pains I did last time, so will probably not get it changed at present, although the muscle wastage is frankly alarming to say the least, as I know how hard it is to get back.
Well it seems to be the pain has clarified into three type.
the first is a deep seated bone ache, this being constant is mostly manageable, although to much to allow sleep without the help of medication.
the second is a ball of pain behind the knee, it has become apparent this is the major cause, as it's where the pain originates when I move the leg from vertical to horizontal or back again, it gets bumped or bashed, and when the leg swings.
the third is somewhat of a mystery, ranging from a feeling of ice water being dripped and running around my leg to a sharp electric shock kind of thing, now I've been told that as well as the tendon and ligament damage the blood vessels and nerves are a bit of a mess, and as they haven't looked at the soft tissue stuff as yet I can't expect this to change until they do.
An interesting development, the pain was all consuming with the ribbons of light around my vision, light headed, tears the whole nine yards so to speak, and yet now although I get the same symptoms the pain is almost remote, it’s there and no doubt as intense , however somewhat muffled, perhaps it’s the minds way of dealing with prolonged pain ?
Still waking up to the hammer blow pain, then then again that's from behind the knee, so I'll be looking for improvement after they do some work there.
I’m using the broken left index finger as a bench mark to the leg bones, and indeed the finger is aching badly, which feels somewhat like (although a lot less) the deep bone ache of the leg, which I’m taking as a good thing and it’s mending nicely.
the Psychological.
I guess the biggest thing is the feel of a monotone existence, time not having any meaning, and everyday being the same, I’m sick to death of my living room, the chair I sit in most of the day, but then I was expecting that.
Anything out of the ordinary happening in my day seems to have taken on a disproportional importance almost to the extent of a kid on Christmas eve and if for some reason the expected doesn’t happen it’s almost crushing in it’s impact, silly perhaps but I think an unavoidable consequence of my limited world at present.
I have the odd depressive patch and have to pull myself out of it.
The visits, calls and text messages are a real spirit lifter, and what with the forum, my friendly stranger, are just about keeping me sane.
I’ve had to make a hard decision, well not hard but reluctant, and that’s to cancel just about everything I was going to do over Christmas and the new year, in favour of protecting my leg from further injury or mishap, after going to Selkent Wednesday and having four or five incidents, as well as the five hours or so waiting for the leg to calm down before I could get any sleep, it became apparent I’m still a little fragile, so apart from missing the NEC show, rideouts weekly meets and other stuff, Christmas is going to be rather dull this year ( I just might have it a few months later once I’m back).
So to round it all of, I’m where I should be at this stage, and all I have to do is kill time until the 18th of December when I’ll learn what comes next in the way of treatment.
I’m hoping that they will let me out of the cast and I can have a leg brace, which will mean I’m able to walk on both legs all be it with some support, but we’ll have to see ?
I may well be back in hospital over Christmas/ New year it’s all dependent on the knee specialist (and perhaps sooner is better, it’s not as if I’m doing anything anyway), but may well have to wait until the new year.
Cheers Mark.
Fizzy Fish
24-11-06, 07:38 AM
hey sorry to hear about you missing the Christmas stuff :(
all i can say is that when you do get to do things again they're going to be all the sweeter...you'll be raving about how it's the best NEC show ever, and it'll even be nice to see the mangy copper who moves us on from Frith :lol:
:grouphug:
Hey, muscle wastage can be seen as a good thing - I now fit into size 8 trousers rather than size 10. :P :wink:
rictus01
24-11-06, 11:04 AM
Hey, muscle wastage can be seen as a good thing - I now fit into size 8 trousers rather than size 10. :P :wink:
Funnily enough I was saying to Beth, all she needs is a screwed knee and she to could loose a stone and a half in 6 six weeks, she didn't seem all that keen for some reason :?
Cheers Mark.
krazykim
24-11-06, 11:15 AM
Was good to see you Wednesday. Shame you won't be able to make the events over xmas but we will have to have an honourary xmas bash when you're feeling more up to it. I know it's a tough decision you've made but it's got to be for the best, although we'll all miss you! We can still set up the webcam idea and have you sat in the upper part of the restaurant? (Preferably in a padded room to keep you safe from harm!) X
Hey, muscle wastage can be seen as a good thing - I now fit into size 8 trousers rather than size 10. :P :wink:
Funnily enough I was saying to Beth, all she needs is a screwed knee and she to could loose a stone and a half in 6 six weeks, she didn't seem all that keen for some reason :?
Cheers Mark.
She shouldn't knock it y'know. It was a major victory for me to weigh in at OVER 8st yesterday! :shock:
OK, so it was 8st 1 lb... but that's still over OK. :roll: :oops:
BernardBikerchick
28-11-06, 09:59 AM
Hey, muscle wastage can be seen as a good thing - I now fit into size 8 trousers rather than size 10. :P :wink:
Funnily enough I was saying to Beth, all she needs is a screwed knee and she to could loose a stone and a half in 6 six weeks, she didn't seem all that keen for some reason :?
Cheers Mark.
mark i keep readin your posts and truly beloeve that this litle forum is helping you in some way xxxx its good to get it all out so to speak xxxxxxx was lovely to see you and i'll be popping in all the time xxxx anything you need you know my number xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx so honoured you came to my birthday bash, all be it that i managed to cause you yet again further pain !!! :roll: :roll: so sorry honey xx :oops: :oops: xxxxxxxx
SIZE 8 !!!!! PAH !! :cry: :cry: :cry: wish i was ! once a fat cow always a fat cow for me !!! :roll: :roll:
BBC HUGS and GROPES for mark xxxxxxxxx
rictus01
28-11-06, 11:50 AM
mark i keep readin your posts and truly beloeve that this litle forum is helping you in some way xxxx its good to get it all out so to speak xxxxxxx was lovely to see you and i'll be popping in all the time xxxx anything you need you know my number xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx so honoured you came to my birthday bash, all be it that i managed to cause you yet again further pain !!! :roll: :roll: so sorry honey xx :oops: :oops: xxxxxxxx
SIZE 8 !!!!! PAH !! :cry: :cry: :cry: wish i was ! once a fat cow always a fat cow for me !!! :roll: :roll:
BBC HUGS and GROPES for mark xxxxxxxxx
Indeed it is Vern, much as I have a choice most of my time is spent either in pain or frustrated boredom; only punctuated by welcome visitors and all to brief visits here (20 minutes is about my max until I have to move and the buildup of pain needs attention).
I had a great time last Wednesday, for a start I got the trip to the corner shop, may not sound like much (and in fact is about 150-200 yds) but it was nice to get out for a couple of hours, then I found the changed cast was just a little shorter than before so in Bens car it wasn't wedged between the seat and footwell; which enabled me to lift it a bit from time to time and stop the transmitted forces.
Add to this the usual friendly crowd from Selkent and it couldn't help but be a wonderful time :)
the Icing on the cake of course was a rather nice cuddle with a certain very attractive birthday girl 8)
what's a little pain and discomfort (after all I get that normally) compared to that? :wink:
Cheers Mark X
rictus01
05-12-06, 04:01 AM
all things just about static at the moment and not really expecting anything to change until I go back.
into a routine of good sleep one night, none the following, a couple of hours the next, then so tired I'm back to a good night again.
it's enough and I get by with just a little codeine at present.
the only thing that's changed is the muscle wastage, lost about the same again, so had the cast changed today, they didn't have the blue so settled on red.
http://upload4.postimage.org/1828175/redleg.jpg (http://upload4.postimage.org/1828175/photo_hosting.html)
Cheers Mark.
Mark,
Keep your chin up your doing amazingly well and after all what is Xmas (bah humbug) I have cancelled this years in any case ;)
After the green fiasco I am glad to see that you have at least chosen a decent colour this time!!
Take it easy and look after yourself!
A
the only thing that's changed is the muscle wastage, lost about the same again, so had the cast changed today, they didn't have the blue so settled on red.
http://upload4.postimage.org/1828175/redleg.jpg (http://upload4.postimage.org/1828175/photo_hosting.html)
Cheers Mark.
Now saying that is red is like saying that candy-assed weak pearly-pink Triumph came out with was red. :oops:
It looks pink dude. :P
But then only Real Men TM can wear pink*. :wink:
* Real Men TM excludes Hovi5 on the grounds that he actually likes the colour pink... and appears to wear a tu-tu when rinding his bike. Nuff said.
rictus01
05-12-06, 09:21 AM
Thanks Anna, although I haven't done anything to get to this stage, in fact my major imput has been to do nothing :shock:
You were worried about the green clashing with the carpet :?
K although I'll grant you it could be taken as pink perhaps in the pic it isn't ( although of course refering to your comment I could carry it off without a problem :wink: ), they indeed do have a pink option but it's a day glow pink you'd need sunglasses just to get it done :D
Cheers Mark.
... they indeed do have a pink option but it's a day glow pink you'd need sunglasses just to get it done :D
Cheers Mark.
Hmmm, that definately could be a problem with the ol' sleeping issue. It'd be difficult to drift off into the land of nod when you leg is glowing like it went on holiday to Chernobyl. :shock:
rictus01
05-12-06, 09:39 AM
At least it's tight enough for now and should last the next couple of weeks, by then (with a little luck) I should be in a leg brace and be finished with them (well for now anyway).
Cheers Mark.
K although I'll grant you it could be taken as pink perhaps in the pic it isn't ( although of course refering to your comment I could carry it off without a problem :wink: ), they indeed do have a pink option but it's a day glow pink you'd need sunglasses just to get it done :D
It's not pink, its "nuclear red"?
Dan
rictus01
05-12-06, 09:44 AM
It's not pink, its "nuclear red"?
Dan
No Dan that WAS Pink :wink:
rictus01
10-12-06, 02:26 AM
Update time again.
day 60.
Physical.
After getting my nice new red cast on monday, it's now as loose as the previous one in a little more than 5 days :shock: , still on the plus side I've got myself a "lazyboy" type recliner which helps with moving position.
Not alot else happening, just waiting.
Had a fall this morning, bashed my hip, but that was nothing compared to the world of hurt it caused in the leg, don't think I've done anymore damage, but bl**dy hell did it hurt, still not quit calmed down now and that was 20 hours ago.
physiological.
the techniques I use to manage the pain are becoming a little less effective as time goes on, and playing the cheerful recovering person just that little bit more taxing, I feel almost vampireish (is that a word?) drawing what I can from those that visit me. Reserves of just about everything are low to nonexistent, and I'm clinging to the 18th or December like a drowning man.
Bl**dy police have sent me a nice letter asking if I want to help out with a statement, meaning they have lost the original, so I'll have to do that again :roll:
So not great news, but I'm still here and time has passed,just cross your fingers people for good news the Monday after next.
Cheers Mark.
Biker Biggles
10-12-06, 10:05 AM
Best wishes.Hope progress speeds up soon.
BTW that sounds like a police delaying tactic caused by ineptitude rather than them losing stuff.
rictus01
10-12-06, 01:56 PM
BTW that sounds like a police delaying tactic caused by ineptitude rather than them losing stuff.
Just find it a p*ss take to ask the victim who will more than probably end up with a permanent disability from it; if they want to take part, or maybe it's just me, I can't garantee a balanced perspective these days.
Cheers Mark.
Could I suggest not falling over ;) Imagine the cast being loose again is more muscle loss :( The sooner you're out of that and able to start putting the leg to use again the better, know its not going to happen over night though, hang in there
As for the plod, may be a case of them asking if you are willing to help with the case against the cage driver, but not in so many words :roll:
blinkin heck Mark.. you will do anything for attention.. green cast then that bright red one.. and now falling over :roll: :wink:
hope the pain subsides a little for you.
im going to come down to see you one night this week Mark
can you pm your address and mobile - i know ive got it but ive never known you answer my calls / texts so i just wanna double check, just in case you werent ignoring me as usual ! :lol: :lol:
btw - enter the dvd comp ! you might win an extra copy! 8)
After getting my nice new red cast on monday, it's now as loose as the previous one in a little more than 5 days :shock: , still on the plus side I've got myself a "lazyboy" type recliner which helps with moving position.
:lol: Now you know why I was so attached to my recliner chair.
On the cast side - they pack a fair bit of cotton wool in them things - nice and fluffy to start with but it flattens down a hell of a lot. Hopefully most of that looseness is being caused by that rather than muscle wasteage this time.
Im pleased to report that Mark was in good form when i dropped in on him today. :D
His Mrs came in with his dinner on a tray, he sat with it on his lap for about 5 mins , but eventually asked me to put it to one side , as he had not stopped talking and i think he had realized he wasnt going to stop until i left ! :lol: :lol:
Hes having a tough time and i must say he is dealing with it brilliantly ! :lol: :lol:
BernardBikerchick
17-12-06, 11:28 PM
totallllllly agree !!! HE IS A TRUE INSPIRATION TO US ALL !!!!! mark you are amazing !! so good to see you today honey xxx sorry it was so brief i will make up for it next time !! xxxxx you are truly doing so well i know it is slow but you have improved no end since i last saw you xxxxxxxxxx see you tuesday honey xx
bbc :lol: :lol: :lol:
rictus01
18-12-06, 03:30 AM
Yeah, I'm truly inspirational? a perfect example of a man whittled down by the grind of chronic pain, two things are all that I cling to at this moment.
I haven't really mentioned the single most important one, the bedrock of my being, she who makes me whole and is and will always be there no matter how short tempered or irrational I maybe, she'll never read this as she doesn't come on here, but if any of you (and some have) ever meet this diminutive Philipino, know that she is the steel that keeps me standing tall, my darling wife.
The second is thoughs that have put themselves out; for no reason I can see, to give me that little bit extra just when I'm in need the most.
I've always chosen to believe the best in people, and it's not a belief that I've maintained without some cost over the years, but realism has often proved otherwise, however I've seen and received something far beyond my expectation over this ordeal to this point and I'm truly humbled by it.
I fervently hope none of you are ever in a position to understand exactly what it means to me, but know this, a simple text or visit means a whole lot more than is sometimes shown, and I thank you all.
I've managed a few hours sleep tonight (which was unexpected) and only achieved by the massed visit this evening (very tiring but in a good way), however that was ended by the (as I've come to expect) hammer blow awakening, so I lay here now on the floor of my living room; leg pounding away, awaiting the dawn and the expectation of the hospital appointment in a little under seven hours time.
I'm sure I could have reached this point without the support I've received but am truly grateful I didn't have to.
So inspirational, you bet it's just pointed in the wrong direction, how does it go " with a little help from my friends".
Cheers Mark
... and the expectation of the hospital appointment in a little under seven hours time.
Finger crossed - check
Toes crossed - check (yeah, I can cross my toes. Wierd huh.)
Legs crossed - check (but that's cos I need a wee)
Eyes cosrsed - cehck
rictus01
18-12-06, 08:32 AM
... and the expectation of the hospital appointment in a little under seven hours time.
Finger crossed - check
Toes crossed - check (yeah, I can cross my toes. Wierd huh.)
Legs crossed - check (but that's cos I need a wee)
Eyes cosrsed - cehck
Thanks.
Amanda M
18-12-06, 10:04 AM
Hope all goes well today Mark. I'll be keeping everything crossed for you :)
:grouphug:
Good luck Mark fingers crossed
Good luck at the hospital.
Dan
454697819
18-12-06, 10:57 AM
everything is crossed Rictus,
do let us know
rictus01
18-12-06, 02:00 PM
Quick update, well a mixed bag of sorts.
First the good news, the cast is gone :!:
Eight weeks of purgatory are over, in that regard, result.
I'm in a leg brace, which I can remove to sleep and have a bath (trust me little things mean a lot).
The wounds from the surgery have healed well (although I'm going to be getting more along the line).
now the not so good, the consultant wanted to put me back in a case for another four weeks, which wasn't going to happen, but as the top of the tib & fib has become separated he's unable to reconnect the ligaments, the whole joint is very unstable, so a compromise was reached, I'm not allowed to weight bare and have the brace set for a range of 0-45' this I've got to exercises for the next six weeks without any load through the leg (can't do anything without the brace on even to the point I can have a bath, but have to drain the water, dry myself and refit the brace before trying to get out), he's hoping this will pull the tib & fib back in line or at least closer so he can reattach the ligaments, any standing on it runs the risk of splitting the bones apart, so that's a no no, the front of the knee feels like it's under local anesthetic and what I thought was pain from the front is actually from the back where the nerve have been severed, so a big numb area which I'm not going to get back.
He confirmed it's not going to be a total recovery and after being told I only need enough to use the gear change on the bike said he would do his best ( be thought it unlikely to ever be strong enough to support a bike on that leg without a brace/ side stand side).
So another six weeks to wait, and I still can't stand on my own two feet :?
I can draw some comfort from the absents of the cast, but in general, it's not good.
Cheers Mark.
I'm in a leg brace, which I can remove to sleep and have a bath (trust me little things mean a lot).
I'm sure your wife and visitors will be glad of this bit of news. :wink:
...the consultant wanted to put me back in a case for another four weeks, which wasn't going to happen...
Kinda :smt064 :smt014 :smt021 :smt075 :winner:
fizzwheel
18-12-06, 08:42 PM
I wish it could have been better news than this. But its not a total disaster and at least you've got that infernal cast off now.
Try as best as you can to keep your chin up fella. Try and take what each day chucks at you as best you can.
Hey Mark, great news that you've got the brace - I'm really sorry to hear that everything else didn't progress in the way that you hoped. I'll keep my fingers crossed that it won't be too long until you can move onto the next stage.
Really lovely to see you yesterday and have a proper natter. (I will now always think of you when I see hanging baskets that need watering! :wink: ).
I'm sure I'll be able to come over again between Xmas and New Year - if you're feeling up to a visit from a daft bird that is.
Love Cazza x.
Rossi_C
18-12-06, 10:21 PM
Only just read this, having been away for a few years!!!!! Oops
Really sorry to hear about your off Mark. But great to see you are in high spirits.
Wish you a quick recovery mate!
Ross
rictus01
19-12-06, 06:42 AM
I’m sorry perhaps that last post of mine sounded a little negative, I spend the day reveling in the freedom of being cast free, and what dose that mean? Well it’s huge, predominately the pain has been replaced by an ache, OK a persistent bugger, and I can see it grinding away over the coming weeks, but so much better that the pain.
I slept in my recliner for a few hours yesterday, the first time I’ve managed that.
Although I awoke to a nagging ache this morning, no hammer blow pain, it’s only taken me an hour or so to get it mostly under control, and not the 3-4 hours that had become my daily routine.
I can remain in a static position for an hour or more at times and actually have some comfort, which is also something new.
Of course without the cast the leg feels incredibility vulnerable, and I’m having to lift it to move (with the cast you can just drag it about) and surprisingly weak (it takes an effort just the raise the leg), but I’m hoping this will improve with a little practice and time, so not all doom and gloom.
I'm in a leg brace, which I can remove to sleep and have a bath (trust me little things mean a lot).
I'm sure your wife and visitors will be glad of this bit of news. :wink:
Having developed a techniquece of laying across the shower tray, I was having 2-3 a day anyway, not for any hygiene reasons, but just to make it feel different, which I’m sure you’ll understand, (although the manky toothpick exposed yesterday was a tad gross).
the consultant wanted to put me back in a case for another four weeks, which wasn't going to happen...
Kinda :smt064 :smt014 :smt021 :smt075 :winner:
A win yes but I did have to sit though 15 minutes of lecture about how easy it would be to damage the knee now the cast was gone, and promise to be a good boy and not try any standing on it, small price to pay.
I wish it could have been better news than this. But its not a total disaster and at least you've got that infernal cast off now.
Try as best as you can to keep your chin up fella. Try and take what each day chucks at you as best you can.
You’re right Fizz, as a wise person has already pointed out, I’ve managed the last 8 weeks =, the next six should be easier (with any luck), and as to the “Chin up” stuff, the guys & girls have been a godsend in an ongoing stream of support which has made such a differences.
Really lovely to see you yesterday and have a proper natter. (I will now always think of you when I see hanging baskets that need watering! :wink: ).
I'm sure I'll be able to come over again between Xmas and New Year - if you're feeling up to a visit from a daft bird that is.
Love Cazza x.
I might not be genetically engineered for it, but over the years I’ve developed to match just about any of you ladies on the “chat” front (OK with Vern it’s a close run thing), but no I really did enjoy it, anytime you want to come over will be an occasion I’ll look forward to.
Only just read this, having been away for a few years!!!!! Oops
Really sorry to hear about your off Mark. But great to see you are in high spirits.
Wish you a quick recovery mate!
Ross
Hi Ross, if I haven’t got my wires crossed aren’t you our policeman chap from a while back (Soho massive) ? if so then nice to see you back, although in different parts now I see, yeah not the best of times, but if the saying “if it don’t kill you , it only makes you stronger” is anywhere near true, I’m expecting ox like strength any day now.
Cheers Mark.
Amanda M
19-12-06, 09:55 AM
Hi Mark.
Good news about your cast being off and there being less pain :) Good luck with the next 6 weeks and I hope there's better news for you next time!
Amanda
:grouphug:
rictus01
19-12-06, 12:36 PM
Hi Mark.
Good news about your cast being off and there being less pain :) Good luck with the next 6 weeks and I hope there's better news for you next time!
Amanda
:grouphug:
Thanks Amanda, been working today, spent a hour or so just straightening (well as much as I can) my leg, the bending to 45' isn't a problem, but straightening is a b*gger, I wasn't aware your knee was directly attached to your tear ducts, but it seems it is :shock:
Can't believe just how weak that leg is :shock: it's going to be a lot of work once the surgery is completed, still at this stage I'm happy I should be able to stop the muscle wastage.
Cheers Mark.
Samnooshka
19-12-06, 12:45 PM
Hi Mark.
Good news about your cast being off and there being less pain :) Good luck with the next 6 weeks and I hope there's better news for you next time!
Amanda
:grouphug:
Thanks Amanda, been working today, spent a hour or so just straightening (well as much as I can) my leg, the bending to 45' isn't a problem, but straightening is a b*gger, I wasn't aware your knee was directly attached to your tear ducts, but it seems it is :shock:
Can't believe just how weak that leg is :shock: it's going to be a lot of work once the surgery is completed, still at this stage I'm happy I should be able to stop the muscle wastage.
Cheers Mark.
It was great to talk to you yesterday :D , even if the recepton was bad so couldn't understand everything you said :P . Hang in there, and lets hope in another 6 weeks the doctors will have some good news about being able to operate. my fingers are crossed for you .http://www.icebaymals.co.uk/forums/html/emoticons/57.gif
rictus01
19-12-06, 12:57 PM
It was great to talk to you yesterday :D , even if the recepton was bad so couldn't understand everything you said :P . Hang in there, and lets hope in another 6 weeks the doctors will have some good news about being able to operate. my fingers are crossed for you .http://www.icebaymals.co.uk/forums/html/emoticons/57.gif
Yeah good to talk to you Sam, I can remember the last time I spoke to a young attractive female whilst sitting in a bath :wink: .
Cheers Mark
northwind
19-12-06, 06:35 PM
Straightening a ropey knee's harder/more painful and more work than bending in general, I think, gave me absolute hell. I got most of the bending movement back long before I could fully straighten the leg out... And I had probably less muscle damage (much les wastage, but more physical damage) and none of the ligament damage.
I wish I could think of helpful/supportive/funny things to say, but I can't, so you'll have to make up your own.
Rossi_C
20-12-06, 07:04 PM
..........
Only just read this, having been away for a few years!!!!! Oops
Really sorry to hear about your off Mark. But great to see you are in high spirits.
Wish you a quick recovery mate!
Ross
Hi Ross, if I haven’t got my wires crossed aren’t you our policeman chap from a while back (Soho massive) ? if so then nice to see you back, although in different parts now I see, yeah not the best of times, but if the saying “if it don’t kill you , it only makes you stronger” is anywhere near true, I’m expecting ox like strength any day now.
Cheers Mark.
Indeed I was the policeman from the days in Soho Massive. It's nice to be back, so to speak. I've currently got my eye on an Sv 650 S K2 after I sold my K3 some years ago now after my accident. Now I've got a little extra cash, i can get a new(ish) bike. Great to see some of the old faces and cant wait to finally meet them all again, some great peope here!!!
Nice to know that your are on the mend and keen to get riding with "ox like strength" but until then I may be poising a few questions your way concerning my new(ish) bike, that's if you don't mind of course!?!?! hehehehe, I'm sure I can count on your knowledge concerning the SV more so than a Haynes manual!!!
Best wishes mate,
Ross
Well it's very good news that you are out of the cast now .. and no more horrid colour clashes will torment us again!! ;)
Obviously it's not the news that you wanted to hear but at this stage it's good that you get rid of the cast and are able to start to do some exercises suggested. At least this is something you are in control of and from a psychological point of view must mean a hell of a lot right now??
At this stage I must ask that you refrain from falling down any more and pulling your own teeth out with sweets .. just a small request that if granted should help you along a little ;) :lol:
Finally one of these :grouphug: is making it's way to you ;)
rictus01
21-12-06, 05:51 AM
At this stage I must ask that you refrain from falling down any more and pulling your own teeth out with sweets .. just a small request that if granted should help you along a little ;) :lol:
Finally one of these :grouphug: is making it's way to you ;)
OK so what you're saying is no self mutilation :shock: , well that's my Christmas fun out the window then :wink:
But i'll do my best if only to cash in the :grouphug: promised :P
Cheers Mark.
Rob S (Yella)
21-12-06, 03:12 PM
Hello mark.
I keep meaning to PM or even give you a visit but been working about 9 days per week for the last few weeks.
Glad your out the cast but please dont try and do anything you should'nt on that leg. A few weeks care now will give you years of benefit. You can (will) get over a Severe Knee/leg injury but it does seem to take for ever. I went to the Christmas dinner this year and a few peeps (the ones that remember me) were suprised to see me without a stick/crutch and not walking like a pregnant penguin with cramp so if I can do it then you can to.
If you pm me your address I will try and pop over sometime soonish.
PS. just out of interest who is your consultant.
rictus01
21-12-06, 07:36 PM
Hi Rob, I was going to make the Soho bash and planned to see you there, but then remembered those steps :shock:
PM sent.
Cheers Mark.
amarko5
28-12-06, 02:18 AM
Hi Rob, I was going to make the Soho bash and planned to see you there, but then remembered those steps :shock:
PM sent.
Cheers Mark.
not being a person that lurk's in others forums i had totally missed this :oops:
Mark I am in awe at your steadfastness and resolve, you really are an inspiration (and that's not just small talk) it's true.
I appreciate your ability to post the negatives alongside the positives (and after reading all the post's there are positives) putting your heart on your sleeve so to speak takes more courage than i would have shown, and just goes to prove what a great guy you are.
my sincere best wishes to you over the coming months as you heal both physically and mentally ( no offence meant by that statement) the support and visits from members / family and friends you are receiving just proves your highly thought of in the extreme.
but one thing i will say (your not getting any kisses off me :P ) hugs and back pats, admiration yes but no kisses not on your Nelly :P :lol:
rictus01
28-12-06, 07:14 AM
Thanks for that, I hadn't reviewed this thread from the beginning, and have just read it all through.
It's a little sanitized but not much, anyone going through something like this will know what's missing and where.
Don't take this the wrong way, thanks very much but I'll stick to the kisses from the ladies.
I'll add an update after the festivities are over (wouldn't want to be a kill joy for anyone else).
Cheers Mark.
argatxa
28-12-06, 02:12 PM
Just read the hole thread for the first time.... it is not easy but sounds like this stage is being a time of self-discovery and that...
Hope you mend well (lets forget about the soon thing for now)
L
PS: Yet another remainder for all of us to take it easy, my last one was a dislocated shoulder three months ago and I was sufffering like hell the first week... I am such a wussy....
amarko5
28-12-06, 11:40 PM
missing and where.
Don't take this the wrong way, thanks very much but I'll stick to the kisses from the ladies.
Cheers Mark.
Phew *wipes brow* thank god for that :lol: and it seems there are plenty of ladies. :kiss:
P.S. Mark if i can be of any help RE: AR 2007 planning just drop me a PM, maybe have a few bit's of local knowlege to impart. :thumbsup:
anyway here's a :grouphug:
rictus01
29-12-06, 04:03 AM
Indeed the ladies have taken good care of me, as to AE07 (AR07 being part of the Event) expect developments in January.
Cheers Mark.
For those that do not know.
AE = Annual Event. AR being the Annual Rideout. Evolution you see. :wink:
Fizzy Fish
29-12-06, 03:32 PM
and just in case anyone is still confused, 07 = 2007
:wink: :lol: :lol:
mark - good to hear you've escaped the cast at last. does this mean us girls will get treated to a flash of leg when we pop round for a visit now?? :wink:
BernardBikerchick
06-01-07, 04:46 PM
Indeed the ladies have taken good care of me, as to AE07 (AR07 being part of the Event) expect developments in January.
Cheers Mark.
happy new year sweetheart xx how are you ???? no sign of you for a while us peeps are getting a bit worried :? :? :?
your bbc loonpot xxxxxxxxx :wink: :wink: :wink:
CoolGirl
07-01-07, 11:03 AM
does this mean us girls will get treated to a flash of leg when we pop round for a visit now?? :wink:
I can confirm that this is indeed now the case :wink:
[no sign of you for a while us peeps are getting a bit worried :? :? :?
I was up there yesterday for quite some time and he is alive and kicking :D (I mean this literally - have seen a demonstration of how long it takes him to kick something. At this stage I'd squarely put my money on the other team winning, but he deffo gets 'man of the match' for effort)
rictus01
07-01-07, 11:14 AM
I'm still here, well in fact I'm a most predictable person these days as I can't really do anything or go anywhere else :?
In an effort to not throw a dampener on anyone else's festive fun I've refrained from posting, as my mum would say "if you've got nothing good to say, don't say anything at all".
The best I could manage was to not so much dealing with things over this period, but more pushing everyone away and enduring the time on my own (as apposed to the irrational feeling to beat anyone to a bloodied pulp who wished me a merry this or happy that :shock: ), spent most of Christmas day, all of boxing day and the New year in a very dark mood, but at least the wife and son got to spend the time with others enjoying the merriment instead of stuck here with me.
In essence, I've a deeper understanding of the depression side of Christmas than I previously possessed.
I'll draw a line under that now and move on from here.
Day 88
Physical.
I guess I should start from when the cast was removed, it did feel good, I had 5-6 days where I just spent most of the time sleeping (and I really needed it too), but as seems to be the case with this thing then the other shoe dropped :!:
Christmas eve in the evening the leg introduced my to the next faze of pains. Every thing from a feeling of ice water dripped on the skin or perhaps a bit of freezing steel touched somewhere; all the way through to sharp stabbing pains. these would start and stop at will, ranging from seconds to hours on end, not linked to any movement I could discern and absolutely nothing I could do about them, this ment that sleep was once again all but impossible and exhaustive sleep for the odd hour here and there is all I've managed since, I'm down the GP's tomorrow for something else to help me sleep as the lack of this makes dealing with the knee a loosing battle, not to mention fighting through the mental molasses it induces.
The knee itself ?, well after a concerted effort I've found I can't straighten it no matter what, soft tissue prevents in from going back far enough (about 5' off) having tried beyond the point of pain and to the blacking out stage, trust me it's not me stopping it, it just won't get there :shock:
Bending, well although I'm allowed the 45' stuff I can get about 60' but don't know whether that's god or bad at this stage so won't try pushing beyond this for now.
Everything is very slow and takes a real effort which hasn't improved, but I think I know why :?:
Looking at the leg in comparison to the other it's a different shape :shock: , I'm not talking about the knee here , but the thigh muscles.
this should help.
http://upload5.postimage.org/141797/ThighMuscles.jpg (http://upload5.postimage.org/141797/photo_hosting.html)
I seem to be missing the Stratorius and both Vastus muscles from that side :shock: , leaving only the Rectus Femoris to raise the lower leg.
I haven't been told these muscles are gone and I think they are just not connected through the knee anymore and hanging flaccid so will need surgery to connect back up :?:
Now this effectively means I've the use of one off the four muscles you would normally have, I'll confirm this with the consultant when I'm there next.
All this means I'm at an impass as I can do no more to progress thing and once again it's a case of just waiting.
Phycological.
Well I guess I'd have to say, taking out the Christmas stuff (which is a real kick in the head, just when you don't need it), I've got a spiral routine of fairly good days eroding to unmanageable (through lack of sleep) at times, this is normally re-started by something like someone visiting me or new painkillers or something else, I guess it's a fairly normal depression cycle, but not having been here before I really don't know.
I should be able to pull myself out of it and sometimes can, but most times it's just easier to let it wash over you.
So that's where I am, just killing time until the Doc's say they can do their stuff, another four weeks to go :roll: :roll:
Cheers Mark.
(having a good day today, thanks Si/Deb :wink: )
Well, killing Time is better than killing anything else I guess - but he is an elusive bugger and keeps coming back for more. :? :wink:
I had guessed right with the ol' 'which muscles are which'. Yay me. :P
I guess the small comfort in knowing there's nothing more you can really do is that there's nothing more that you can really do! :smt102
Just keep up the good work so far and channel your anger towards the state of the NHS. :thumleft:
Rob S (Yella)
10-01-07, 02:46 PM
Hello Mark,
hope you not in a mood to bash me but I was reading your post and some of the symptoms you are having are similar to my experiences so I thought I'd comment.
The knee itself ?, well after a concerted effort I've found I can't straighten it no matter what, soft tissue prevents in from going back far enough (about 5' off) having tried beyond the point of pain and to the blacking out stage, trust me it's not me stopping it, it just won't get there
This is common in multiple ligament injuries and when you have had whatever surgery is needed to fix it then scar tissue and shortened muscles etc will take over and make a strait leg quiet hard to achieve. My prang was 3 years ago and I can't fully get a strait leg. As long as you can get close then you can get away with walking about without locking out but it takes about 20% more effort with each step. This is not a big deal really since in real terms it's like taking the effort of 10 miles for every 8 you walk if that makes sense.
Bending, well although I'm allowed the 45' stuff I can get about 60' but don't know whether that's god or bad at this stage so won't try pushing beyond this for now.
This is probably the main problem that knee injuries can throw up. I have been pushing this with Gym/Swim/physio/Hydro since my rebuild in May 05 and can just about get past 90 degrees if I warm up but from cold it's less than 90 degrees. Not a major problem except you tend to trip everybody up on trains and buses and you will need a certain amount of bend to reach the foot-pegs on a bike. At 6ft 2 and mostly leg I still can't get my foot on an SV foot-peg. If you can get 60degrees then that's pretty OK, don't push to hard until you get the go-ahead from your doctor.
Looking at the leg in comparison to the other it's a different shape , I'm not talking about the knee here , but the thigh muscles
Yep, same here. 3 years down the line and my left thigh is thinner (but thicker than it was) and my knee and calf are totally different in each leg. My doc tells me it will always be different as basically most of the bits in the knee knee are either re-built missing or replaced with bits of dead people so the muscles above and below the knee support it in different ways and take on new shapes. That's why when I do thigh exercises my calf and buttocks burn. the body gets very good at working around injuries.
You say 4 weeks to go (less now) but do you know what they plan to do yet. Have you had an MRI, do they plan to rebuild ligaments from your own donated hamstring, or artificial or Allograph (cadaver donated ligament) There are lots of options with knees.
I Had two cadaver donated ligaments for ACL & PCL and one of my own hamstrings was nicked to fix the LCL and the fourth ligament was just left but 3 out of 4 ain't bad.
I would insist your surgeon is a knee specialist. With multiple ligament and knee structure repairs as decisions like whether to do one big fix or if 3 smaller surgeries, and if you want a choice on type of graft etc will have to be made. I opted for the do it all in 1 hit, I know it meant 3 months again of non weight bearing but when I was allowed to start pushing my recovery then I knew It would not be put on hold for any more surgery.
Good luck and keep us updated, I know half the battle is in the mind and that I haven't got a clue about.
rictus01
14-01-07, 01:46 PM
Day 95
Physical
well not alot has changed, perhaps the knee isn't as loose as before, I can manage about 15 minutes supporting the foot upright without the brace, or it could just be me :smt102 .
lost all my appetite which is playing havoc with my diabetes, the Mrs has been great and gets me whatever food I want, I just can't eat it, I'm just about holding my own floating around the 9.5-10 stone mark, 5' to about 50' isn't to much of a problem. but if I don't move it for 20 minutes or so I have to go through a tightness pain before it will move at all, so I've got in the habit of avoiding it by flexing the leg all the time, which also helps with the ache which builds about every 20 minutes or so anyway.
the single thigh muscle I have has got a little more tone, not building up or anything, but then again not wasting either, bit concerned the three that aren't attached will be shortening and I can't do anything about it.
Physiological
Although I got sleeping pills on Monday, they worked for all of one night, even after doubling the dose on Wednesday they still weren't touching the sides, haven't had anything like a nights sleep all week now, the mental fog takes increasing effort to work threw, back to the GP's tomorrow, see what else they've got ?
A maintenance of sanity in the form of Jo (Mrs Ape) on Thursday and Si (BigApe) on Friday, was most welcome, Simon (Mr Toad) also called in yesterday.
Just coasting through as of now, don't feel I've achieved anything in ages and the 29th (next hosp appointment) seems miles away.
hopefully will get some assisted sleep tomorrow, as I've got some paperwork to do which can't be put off, but of now I can't concentrate.
and that's about it for now.
Cheers Mark.
Samnooshka
14-01-07, 07:55 PM
awww hun, hang in there. Sorry you can't sleep or eat. I can't even imagine what you're going through.
Not that it helps, but sending healing thoughts :) wish there was something i could do to make it better for you.
rictus01
16-01-07, 05:31 PM
Thanks Sam, new pills and new sleep, 16 hours yesterday :shock:
Although the last lot worked for the first day, I'm hoping these work for a bit longer, I shied away from the tamazipan (sp?) as I've already had some and didn't like them at all.
will see how it goes, still hurts like hell, but at least I can manage better today :wink:
Cheers Mark.
rictus01
18-01-07, 05:46 AM
Well that didn't work :!:
Got back from Selkent last night, totally knackered and thought I'd pop a couple of sleeping pills. wait for the throbbing to go down and get a reasonable nights sleep :?:
Fat chance :? sat until 2 am, then made my way to bed, laid there for a couple of hours, but no joy, ended up getting in the bath (the only temporary relief I have).
Ho Hum, onwards and upwards.
Cheers Mark.
rictus01
24-01-07, 11:18 AM
Update time again.
Day 105
Physical
well I guess I've probably pushed it to far, over the last couple of weeks I've been stretching the ligaments & tendons, got back a bit of tone in the one attached thigh muscle and can push (gently) to about 105' or so (but still can't get than 5'-0' bit) and hold it for a minute, as the consultant gave me 0'-45', but given the amount of effort involved, even if I was allowed to stand on it I'd only be able to manage a step or two at most. Of course this is all to no avail, as when they re-attach the muscles and tendons/ligaments it will go as tight as a bow string and I'll have to start all over again, still nothing wrong with a little practice.
Got rid of bed sore now which is a great help, right hip playing up a bit as it's taking all my weight hopping about, on that subject, appetite still not fantastic, 9 stone 10 pounds, can remember the last time I was this weight.
physiological
Sleep is still a problem, although I got a few hours yesterday night, last night I paid the price and couldn't get any at all. the almost overwhelming feeling of just "fading to grey" is ever present these days, apart from the times I have company.
This coming Monday is once again Hospital time, steeling myself for another metaphoric kick in the teeth, but I do so hope not.
I must be getting unstable (yes I know, some would say I've been there sometime already :roll: ), but really hoping to go back in hospital :shock:
One day at at time.
Cheers Mark.
Hang in there but don't over do it, know it doesn't seem it but you do have time to heal if you give your body a chance, you just know your body wont let you do things too quickly
Fizzy Fish
24-01-07, 09:19 PM
best of luck for the hospital visit on Monday xx
Amanda M
26-01-07, 09:13 AM
Good luck on monday Mark :)
Yes, good luck for Monday Mark. Will keep my fingers crossed for you and will be thinking of you.
A Cazza hug is winging its way to you. :grouphug:
rictus01
28-01-07, 08:45 AM
Thank you Ladies, I'll try to carry a "warm hug feeling" with me until then.
Cheers Mark.
Mr Toad
28-01-07, 09:40 AM
chin up mate
I've got my legs crossed for you :D
CoolGirl
28-01-07, 05:13 PM
adding my hug for the trip tomorrow.
rictus01
29-01-07, 03:38 PM
update.
Day 110
Just out of the bath after a hospital visit (knee giving it some).
But, and it's been a long time coming,GOOD NEWS.
Apparently I'm not in pain :shock: which was news to me :? :?
I've got a condition (as it was explained to me) where my brain (and yes this doe mean I've got one) has registered the MAX pain I suffered and got stuck at that level, now every pain no matter how minor is interpreted as that :shock: .
Just about to start a three week course on some fairly heavy weight drugs, this is designed to kick start a reset in the brain, so we'll see how it goes.
And the next bit, apparently I've grossly exceeded medical expectations, given the way and amount of movement I've achieved, the consultant no longer wants to operate to attach the two lower leg bones together, but says they have been forced together so well they don't need it. so that's one operation negated :thumbsup:
He's also impressed with the control I have (much more than he had expected) so will for go opening the knee again to do that as well, result a second operation avoided.
So what does this all mean?
well, as I can currently manage about 110' of bend I don't want to loose any of that and him operating would mean 90' max (no good to me as I wouldn't be able to get my foot on a footpeg)so I have to live with the fact that the two muscles I've still got attached on the thigh will have to compensate for the two missing and the slight lack of control will always be there, the stability issue will require other operations (got to do all this still in the brace for sideways stability) but only after I've built up movement and strength.
So I've got an appointment for the physios on the way and have been told I can start to apply weight to that leg leading up to my full body weight.
(although I dd try it about half an hour a go and it's not going to be a fast process, but knowing the pain isn't doing any harm lets me push a bit more than I'd hoped I could).
With any luck over the course of the next three weeks I should have a lowering of the pain, and be well on my way to standing on my own two feet again.
A much happier Mark.
That's brilliant Mark, it's been a long time coming, I'm glad you seem to have turned a corner. Clearly there's a long way to go but it sounds like things are starting to move forwards for you!
Well done mate
Jambo
Fantastic news.
So once they reboot your brain, and have some physio. You can go downstairs and play with your gym!
Dan
Well done mate, reading that has brought a smile to my face :D ......it's great to hear that you've made so much progress :thumbsup:
SoulKiss
29-01-07, 05:24 PM
Great new Mark.
Good to hear it going well - always thought you general stubborness would get you though it better than someone who would have sitten back and given up.
Looking forward to eating your dust at AR07
David
That's fantastic news Mark - I'm so pleased for you.
When you start your physio, ask them when they reckon you can start having massage treatment and I'll come round and give you(r leg) a rub!
C x.
rictus01
29-01-07, 06:15 PM
Thanks Guys, tired but happy now.
Oh the stuff I'm taking is Gabapentin (http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/druginfo/medmaster/a694007.html)
looks a bit serious this one :shock:, I've taken two now but we'll have to see how they work, I could be a little spaced for a while :?:
I've already tried my leg raise on the multi gym, can barely move it with my good one and not at all with the bad , and that's just the block itself with no weights on it (min 10 kg), but then it's just the start, I'll give it another go later, after all you don't get incentive like this When you start your physio, ask them when they reckon you can start having massage treatment and I'll come round and give you(r leg) a rub!
C x.
on the NHS (guess what question I'll be asking first :wink: .)
Cheers Mark.
That's great news to hear. I look forward to seeing you back on your own 2 feet. :D
What the others have said, all good :)
This site may have one or two answers about the pain RSD (http://www.rsd-crps.co.uk) hope thats not what it is though :(
Filipe M.
29-01-07, 06:58 PM
Great news, Mark. :)
CoolGirl
29-01-07, 07:18 PM
brilliant news!
reprogramming your nervous system isn't as bad as having your leg cut open and messes about with unncesessarily. just feels a bit funny. did they suggest things like TENs, acupuncture, tickling (seriously) etc to give it a kick start? Gabapentin is 'interesting', even in small doses. Pardon the pun, but I could barely stand when I was on it, and I think those around me found the gibbering mildly amusing.
But I can vouch for the Cazza cure :D
fizzwheel
29-01-07, 07:52 PM
Thats good news, really pleased for you Mark 8)
Mr Toad
29-01-07, 09:29 PM
Very pleased to hear this :D
Will sir be requiring a lift tomorrow night to another dodgy pub as recommended by Mr Squid :wink:
rictus01
29-01-07, 09:41 PM
Very pleased to hear this :D
Will sir be requiring a lift tomorrow night to another dodgy pub as recommended by Mr Squid :wink:
If it's going, yes please after all it is exercise :wink: ( not to sure of these meds and beer, but we'll find out).
Cheers Mark.
Amanda M
30-01-07, 08:24 AM
:smt058 That's brilliant news for you Mark 8)
rictus01
30-01-07, 08:50 AM
I've set myself the goal of making my world 3 feet taller, as in no more going up stairs on my bum, but rather standing, you may think this isn't a big step, but anyone who knows will tell you there's a huge amount of effort involved.
being as restrained as ever I walked* up and down my stairs 5 times last night before bedtime, hurt like hell and I was a ball of sweat, but laid down at the end of it and went out like a light :!:
Don't know whether it's the new drugs or just the physical activity but I'll try replicating it today again, you never know might have cracked this sleep thing as well :shock: .
Head feels a little cloudy this morning not sure why, could just be the effects of sleep or the Gabapentin :?:
Still new day, onwards and upwards.
Cheers Mark.
* that would be with my crutches and about 5% weight through my leg, any more than that and I'm in danger of passing out, you know darkness around your vision and stuff, brain still thinks it hurts.
I've set myself the goal of making my world 3 feet taller....
Always a better view :) Take it steady and you'll be running up and down in next to no time :)
Good to hear things are on the up for you.
As for looking ahead and stability when riding - hell, as long as you can get your foot on the peg (though it can be, and was my, only excuse for fitting Gilles Adjustables to the 'Blade :wink: ) and wiggle it about enough to change gear that's all you need...
... well, it was for me to make it to the Nurburgring, round and back, last year. :wink: Crutches n all. 8)
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