The Comedy Club - Think up some new jokes

For those that have reported daddyjob's "joke" (using the term loosely) whilst you may consider it to be in bad taste, not funny and insensetive it does not imho break the forum rules.
May I suggest if you don't like his "humour" add him to your IGNORE list and you will no longer see any of his posts.

[gruntygiggles]

I didn't report, I just didn't like it. I don't want to add anyone to my ignore list, I can move on from things immediately. I don't however think there is anything wrong in vocalising a general dislike for something.

[DJ123]

Originally Posted by Captain Nemo

what a *****

Originally Posted by Jabba

Couldn't agree more. Completely insensitive and absolutely no need for it.

Originally Posted by svrich

Me too.I thought this place was better than that.

It was a joke from else where. Appreciate it wasn't 'tasteful'.

[DJ123]

Originally Posted by gruntygiggles

It is most of the time. I am not normally bothered by jokes like that, but sometimes the line is crossed and I believe it has been here. Her family are going through hell, that is no laughing matter.

Can we please keep this thread as lighthearted as it is intended to be?

Post above ^ It was copied and pasted from else where, i appreciate it wasn't 'tasteful'

There are a number of jokes in here about the unfortunate situations that people have gone through. That joke is not the only one of 'bad taste' i have seen.

[gruntygiggles]

Originally Posted by daddyjob

Post above ^ It was copied and pasted from else where, i appreciate it wasn't 'tasteful'

There are a number of jokes in here about the unfortunate situations that people have gone through. That joke is not the only one of 'bad taste' i have seen.

Daddy job, people are just vocalising that they didn't like it that's all. I think it is because this is still a search that is ongoing for a 5 year old girl.

Just because I don't like the joke doesn't mean I don't like the joker and the same goes for most of us

[DJ123]

Completely agree with that if it's in a constructive way with a point to it, much like your own post. Others are more of a pointless one line.

I try not to post such jokes.

Originally Posted by daddyjob

Completely agree with that if it's in a constructive way with a point to it, much like your own post. Others are more of a pointless one line.

I try not to post such jokes.

not really a "pointless" one line. i think it put my sentiment accross clearly as i felt that a simple response would more likely be understood by someone who clearly cant recognise when a situation is not worthy of comedy.

please dont think i don't have a sense of humour, i gigged stand up for 3 years and i ve got a nasty inappropriate sense of humour at times, im just careful about using it in sitautions where it may be misconstrued

[gruntygiggles]

Back to the jokes...

A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse's trainer meets him before the race and says,
"All you have to remember with this horse is that every time you approach a jump, you have to shout, "ALLLLEEE OOOP!" really loudly in the horse's ear. Providing you do that, you'll be fine".
The jockey thinks the trainer is mad but promises to shout the command. The race begins and they approach the first hurdle. The jockey ignores the trainer's ridiculous advice and the horse crashes straight through the center of the jump.
They carry on and approach the second hurdle. The jockey, somewhat embarrassed, whispers "Aleeee ooop" in the horse's ear. The same thing happens -- the horse crashes straight through the center of the jump.
At the third hurdle, the jockey thinks, "It's no good, I'll have to do it" and yells, "ALLLEEE OOOP!" really loudly. Sure enough, the horse sails over the jump with no problems. This continues for the rest of the race, but due to the earlier problems the horse only finishes third.
The trainer is fuming and asks the jockey what went wrong. The jockey replies,
"Nothing is wrong with me -- it's this bloody horse. What is he -- deaf or something?"
The trainer replies, "Deaf?? DEAF?? He's not deaf -- he's BLIND!"

Originally Posted by daddyjob

Apparently, Ford are selling transit vans that are also time travel machines.

Some guy in Wales bought one and ended up back in April...

I think that having a child kidnapped, sexually abused, probably videoed and then probably murdered and posted on the internet for other peoples sexual pleasure is a perfect vehicle for humour, no it really is, you're a **** and can some mod delete my account please, pathethc

[Mark_h]

My bedroom needed re-papering. I knew the neighbour downstairs had recently re-papered the exact same room in his flat, so I went and asked him how many rolls he had bought. "Seven" he replied. So off I went, got the paper and did my bedroom. I papered everything: inside the cupboards and behind the lightswitches. I had two rolls left over. Went back to see him and told him that I didn't understand how, but that I had two rolls left over. "So have I" he said.