Car Drivers on Mobile Phones (still)

a few months ago i was at the front of the traffic at the lights in a town near me. the driver of the car next to me was on the phone but had trouble hearing coz my bike is so loud on tick, so the cheeky w@nker winds his window down shouts to me to turn it f@@kin of coz hes trying to have a convo. the cheek of some ppl

Originally Posted by MiniMatt

Now, I'm not endorsing this kind of criminal behaviour. It's not big. It's not clever. It is however, very funny

he had a can of spray paint taped to the side of his bike (can't remember for the life of me if it was an NTV650 or that shaft drive 500 kawasaki that every other courier rode). Every time he was cut up, he'd keep his cool and just filter alongside at the next set of lights, lean down and "tag" the offender

i know a guy that has sand paper glued to his slidders, if he is cut up, he just rides past with his knee out

Originally Posted by hovis

i know a guy that has sand paper glued to his slidders, if he is cut up, he just rides past with his knee out

A lad I knew took his toe sliders off, drilled a small hole in them and put a screw in from the back, then put them back on, so there were little 'spurs' on the outside of his boots.

Originally Posted by hovis

i know a guy that has sand paper glued to his slidders, if he is cut up, he just rides past with his knee out

And smashes his knee cap, looses control of the bike and crashes?

Originally Posted by MiniMatt

Now, I'm not endorsing this kind of criminal behaviour. It's not big. It's not clever. It is however, very funny

Many moons ago I did a short (and very wet) stint as a bike courier in Nottingham. One of the lads that worked the same area had a tactic for dealing with cretins who cut him up: he had a can of spray paint taped to the side of his bike (can't remember for the life of me if it was an NTV650 or that shaft drive 500 kawasaki that every other courier rode). Every time he was cut up, he'd keep his cool and just filter alongside at the next set of lights, lean down and "tag" the offender. All round nottingham for a while you saw cars with bright yellow spots on their doors and you knew to give them a wide berth Perhaps if you could incorporate some sort of cut out mobile phone template then the police could go round and pick up everyone with a mobile phone graphic on their doors at their leisure

At lunchtime I was working on an idea for a new, slightly more evil version of this. I couldn't condone this as it would obviously be quite illegal, but it would work somewhere along these lines.

1: Put a small tank under the tail seat, something like a model aircraft fuel tank would be perfect, and run a tube from it to a car washer jet pump. We may need to use resistors to lower the voltage to the waher pump to make it run slower, but testing will prove.

2: From the washer pump, run a pipe to something like a scottoiler delivery tube (black pipe) under the footpeg of the bike on your chosen side, so it sticks out beyond where any drips from the pipe could land on your bike.

3: Wire a push switch to a convenient place on the dashboard or bars.

4: Fill tank with chosen liquid, ie dulux emulsion or, for the nasty amongst us, acid, paint stripper, brake fluid, etc etc.

5: Don't get caught!

My usual response it to do the "been drinking" hand sign, then "phone" signal to my ear, followed by the " Vtanker" sign so everyone sees this person on the phone.

Its suprising the amount of peopel that then try to hide it and deny it... Phone still light up in their hands.......

Originally Posted by Ceri JC

I've started doing a hand gesture that's basically followed by the hand sign for a mobile phone at drivers who are using phones.

Short version of mine above

[timwilky]

Originally Posted by Ceri JC

I've started doing a hand gesture that's basically followed by the hand sign for a mobile phone at drivers who are using phones.

It was fun to see bluepete trying to tell the beamer driver to get off the bloody thing as he was crawling up the M6 when we were on our way to the N/S. Even after Pete had spent time trying to point out his errors and rode on, he was still on it when I passed.

It would have been funnier, if instead of gesturing, he flashed the warrant card

[SoulKiss]

Originally Posted by WRCSixtyThree

At lunchtime I was working on an idea for a new, slightly more evil version of this. I couldn't condone this as it would obviously be quite illegal, but it would work somewhere along these lines.

1: Put a small tank under the tail seat, something like a model aircraft fuel tank would be perfect, and run a tube from it to a car washer jet pump. We may need to use resistors to lower the voltage to the waher pump to make it run slower, but testing will prove.

2: From the washer pump, run a pipe to something like a scottoiler delivery tube (black pipe) under the footpeg of the bike on your chosen side, so it sticks out beyond where any drips from the pipe could land on your bike.

3: Wire a push switch to a convenient place on the dashboard or bars.

4: Fill tank with chosen liquid, ie dulux emulsion or, for the nasty amongst us, acid, paint stripper, brake fluid, etc etc.

5: Don't get caught!

My variant involves mounting twin paintball gun barrels under the fairing of my pointy, a compressor and tank and panniers filled with paintballs - which have had the paint taken out and replaced by brake fluid......

Originally Posted by timwilky

It was fun to see bluepete trying to tell the beamer driver to get off the bloody thing as he was crawling up the M6 when we were on our way to the N/S. Even after Pete had spent time trying to point out his errors and rode on, he was still on it when I passed.

It would have been funnier, if instead of gesturing, he flashed the warrant card

Chuckle, every now and again it would be nice to have some flashy blue lights

(not suggesting I'd like to impersonate a police officer, that's very naughty - besides, at 5'5" it wouldn't be a very good impersonation)

PS. WRC63 & Soulkiss - you're onto something there, there's a whole market for non-lethal motorcycle mounted vehicular weapon systems just waiting to be tapped into