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#1 |
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Whats happened to all the jovial banter that used to be on here? Has everybody had their chuckle glands removed?
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#2 |
Captain Awesome
Mega Poster
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Hamble
Posts: 4,266
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if you're referring to the skoda post go back and read again, there was a subtle joke in there
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Official "Dumbass of the Year" 2011 (•_•) ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) Deal with it... |
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#3 |
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I am not a tart,just because after a cup of tea and a jaffa cake I'm antibody's. Its not true,needs suggestive biscuits as-well
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#4 |
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This site used to be funny?
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#5 |
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#6 |
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best I can do at short notice
An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. Before the wedding they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements, and so on. Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship. "How do you feel about sex?" he asked, rather tentatively- "I would like it infrequently" she replied. The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses and leaned over towards her and whispered "Is that one word or two?" |
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#7 |
The Teacer
Mega Poster
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: colchester
Posts: 2,739
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another one that made me laugh
A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables; and when he picked up a CD player to place in his sack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head and continued. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. Did you say that?" He hissed at the parrot. "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed . "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus."
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There's a fine line between a hobby and a mental illness |
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#8 |
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The lounge seems to have gone into stealth mode again...
Think I'll hang out elsewhere for a while ![]() |
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#9 |
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Humour ? Wat's dat den ?
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#10 |
Guest
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![]() Top 10 Best 'Out of Office' Automatic email Replies 1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared for my mood. 2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all. 3. Sorry to have missed you, but I'm at the doctor's having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team. 4. I will be unable to delete all the emails you send me until I return from holiday. Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received. 5. Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged £5.99 for the first 10 words and £1.99 for each additional word in your message. 6. The email server is unable to verify your server connection. Your message has not been delivered. Please restart your computer and try sending again. 7. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks. 8. Hi, I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response. 9. I've run away to join a different circus. 10. I will be out of the office for the next two weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as 'Kate' instead of Dave. |
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Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
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